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Old Yesterday, 05:27 AM   #21
Zndr
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Name: Zander
Join Date: August 2, 2020
Age: 13
Gender: Male
Default Re: Abusive dad is back

Ok so my incredibly stupid impulsiveness gets the best of me yet again. I did the really stupid thing you were advising me against the entire time. We've left for our other families house. Let the judging of me commence now...

I left a letter for my parents telling them basically that me and my brother can't live in this house with them any more. I said the choice was either I called child services on them and got them in trouble or we left and got somewhere safe. I told them once we were safe I would contact them again and if they tried to find us before then I would tell the cops everything dad was doing to us and I have proof of it.

One of the guys who uses me is helping get us there since we can't travel alone on any public transit. Its quite pathetic what these guys will do honestly to have the chance to have sex with me.

And on that subject, I do know its wrong on some level but at this point its normal for me so why not just use it to get something I want or need. I've already made it very clear to this guy that my brother is 100% off limits. Nobody touches my brother. I'll fuck with any of these guys but he doesn't need to be exposed to this life.

5 hours into our 36 hour journey. Was this an absolutely massive fuckup?
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Old Yesterday, 11:10 AM   #22
Second Chance
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Default Re: Abusive dad is back

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Originally Posted by Zndr View Post
Ok so my incredibly stupid impulsiveness gets the best of me yet again. I did the really stupid thing you were advising me against the entire time. We've left for our other families house. Let the judging of me commence now...

I left a letter for my parents telling them basically that me and my brother can't live in this house with them any more. I said the choice was either I called child services on them and got them in trouble or we left and got somewhere safe. I told them once we were safe I would contact them again and if they tried to find us before then I would tell the cops everything dad was doing to us and I have proof of it.

One of the guys who uses me is helping get us there since we can't travel alone on any public transit. Its quite pathetic what these guys will do honestly to have the chance to have sex with me.

And on that subject, I do know its wrong on some level but at this point its normal for me so why not just use it to get something I want or need. I've already made it very clear to this guy that my brother is 100% off limits. Nobody touches my brother. I'll fuck with any of these guys but he doesn't need to be exposed to this life.

5 hours into our 36 hour journey. Was this an absolutely massive fuckup?
None of us here wants to judge you or make you feel badly.

At this stage I think you are in a dangerous position being with someone whose only goal is to have sex with you and to use you in the worst possible way. There is no guarantee that this person is going to fulfill his end of the bargain.

My hope is that you will return home, despite how bad it is, because one way or the other you will end up there because you are legally your parents' child. From home you can deal with the situation much better than being a runaway.

It appears you are heading to your other side of the family which appears to be people you think will help you. Once you get there you know they will have to contact your parents. Assuming that these people are good, then you have to tell them the truth so that they can get you help. If these family members are good and are really helpful, then getting in touch with social services is critical. You have to tell social services everything that has happened to you so that you can get help including for the sexual abuse. If your family does not turn out to be so good, then head to the nearest police station and get help from there.

Because of the Pandemic your family members may not really eager to receive visitors especially if they are in an at risk category. Simply showing up could put them at risk.

My strong suggestion is to go to a police station and get help there. At least break away from the guy you are with so that he will not do anything stupid if he finds out you will be going to a police station. Now that you are out of the house going to a police station on your own will be best.

I know that the situation is really bad for you, and you made a decision to protect yourself and your Brother. I cannot blame you for trying to get out of a bad situation. I am really sorry that our advice was not useful to you.

Even now all of us want you to be all right. While I do disagree with you using your body to get what you want I also know this is not the time to get into a debate about it. At this stage my sincere hope is you can go to the authorities so that they can help you. I am not saying the authorities are perfect, especially after we have seen in Minnesota as of late, but they are far better than going on a cross country trip with a pedophile.

On one side none of us wants to put you down because that has been happening to you all of your life. You made a decision based upon your individual circumstances, and your Father clearly pushed you to the breaking point. At this stage we just want you to be safe and work with the system so that you will not end up in the juvenile justice system. You seem like a very caring person to be willing to do anything for your Brother, and you know that what is going on around you is not right. With that being said, even now it is still not too late to work within the system to set things right.

I hope you will let us know what is going on and where you are. Again, my strong advice to you is either go to the nearest police station or to return home before it is too late.

Last edited by Second Chance; Yesterday at 11:53 AM. Reason: add words
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Old Yesterday, 12:02 PM   #23
Zndr
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Name: Zander
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Age: 13
Gender: Male
Default Re: Abusive dad is back

Being this far from home now, I feel we are to committed to getting to my other family. I mean we are 2 states away now. I dont really want to say where were at. I just don't want to leave a trail of where we're at until we are safe at the destination. I will say we're 11 out of 36 hours of the way there and about 7 hours away from our first transfer point.

I do plan one telling my family everything that's been going on when we get there. I have proof of it. I'm sure my family will take us in. I remember them being nice people.

I am getting more and more nervous the further we go though. Its like you said, what if this guy doesn't follow through. He's been flakey in the past fulfilling his end of deals but in the moment he answered and I wasn't thinking past getting out of there. We are runaways now, arent we?
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Old Yesterday, 12:39 PM   #24
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Being this far from home now, I feel we are to committed to getting to my other family. I mean we are 2 states away now. I dont really want to say where were at. I just don't want to leave a trail of where we're at until we are safe at the destination. I will say we're 11 out of 36 hours of the way there and about 7 hours away from our first transfer point.
When you say that you are heading to a transfer point, then what does that mean? Is another person supposed to pick you up and take you on from there? Who is that person, and do you know who the individual is?

You do not need to tell us where you are, but we are obviously deeply concerned especially since you are with people who do not have the best intentions.

What you need to do is make sure you know exactly where you are at all times and make sure your telephone is charged. That way if something happens, then you can call 911 or the authorities (assuming you are in America).

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I do plan one telling my family everything that's been going on when we get there. I have proof of it. I'm sure my family will take us in. I remember them being nice people.
I have no doubt that your family are nice people if that is the vibe you had gotten from them. However, they cannot just take you in while your parents have custody of you at this point. They have to contact your family once you get there.

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I am getting more and more nervous the further we go though. Its like you said, what if this guy doesn't follow through. He's been flakey in the past fulfilling his end of deals but in the moment he answered and I wasn't thinking past getting out of there. We are runaways now, aren’t we?
You currently are runaways though that does not make you a bad person.

This whole group of people you are with is getting me nervous. None of us has any clue who they are and what their intentions are. I have heard of child sex trafficking rings that even exist in America which shocked me.

Listen, I understand why you are doing what you are, and what has happened has happened. Once you get to the next big city get in touch with the police. You will be safest with them rather than the people you are with now. At this stage the police will help you and get you safe. Especially if you have evidence on what your parents have done you are on strong ground.

We just want you to be safe, and get with responsible adults at this stage which is the police. If your extended family is as good as you say they are, then you can eventually be reunited with them. However, the only way that can happen is if you go through proper channels which is the police. You are not with the safest people right now, and it is best to work with the authorities who will help you without a doubt. When you get to a police station, then let them know about your extended family and try to have to get into contact with them.

None of us are trying to tell you what to do or to discourage to get into contact with your family. However, the basic problem at this point is the people you are with which is getting me nervous. At least if you were on a Greyhound or something like that, then you would have been away from such shady people.

Anyway, let us know that you are safe, and reach out to the police if something is not right.

Last edited by Second Chance; Yesterday at 12:44 PM. Reason: add words
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Old Yesterday, 01:05 PM   #25
Zndr
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Name: Zander
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Gender: Male
Default Re: Abusive dad is back

Sorry. When I said transfer point, I meant we were transferring from a bus we are on to a train. The guy is with us to pay and get us on the busses and trains without questions.

I dont know about just going to the police yet. I'd just feel better doing it after me and my brother are with my family first. I know its stupid. I know this whole trip was a stupid idea but we've committed to it and I promised my brother I was going to get him to our family. We wouldn't be separated. I would protect him the entire way there. Not involving anyone else guarantees we won't get separated on the way. Involving more people just adds more variables that I can't control.
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Old Yesterday, 01:32 PM   #26
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Sorry. When I said transfer point, I meant we were transferring from a bus we are on to a train. The guy is with us to pay and get us on the busses and trains without questions.
I get what you are doing now, and you basically have gotten an adult to accompany you on trains and buses so that no one will ask questions. By having an adult with you, then you will have no questions asked.

My question is once you reach the place where your relatives live, then how will you get from the train station to the relatives? Also, what will you do with the guy accompanying you, and how will you pay him back? Do you have your relatives' contact information including telephone numbers and addresses? How do you know everything is current?

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I dont know about just going to the police yet. I'd just feel better doing it after me and my brother are with my family first. I know its stupid. I know this whole trip was a stupid idea but we've committed to it and I promised my brother I was going to get him to our family. We wouldn't be separated. I would protect him the entire way there. Not involving anyone else guarantees we won't get separated on the way. Involving more people just adds more variables that I can't control.
I think I understand your trip right now with your traveling with one guy who is pretending to be a responsible adult so that you can get past checkpoints without any questions.

At least you are on public transportation and not in a private car which is a relief. If anything goes south, then make sure to head to authorities at a large train station or bus station with a staff and not an unmanned station which do exist especially at more remote parts of the country (assuming you are in the United States).

You should make a mental note of which cities you are passing and know of the nearest big cities coming up. In a lot of small communities there is not cell phone service or even 911 which is why you need to be careful.

If you are on a train, then stay in the most visible place possible never leaving your Brother alone. If you are on a bus, then sit as close to the bus driver as possible.

It is truly disappointing that anyone would use your body as a price to help you. Once you are in a safe place you have to get counseling for that and never to use your body in that way in the future. You are a person who is worth a lot, and never let yourself be treated like an object even if you think it is normal now. What you think is normal is not, and you were tricked into believing something that is a lie to be true.
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Old Yesterday, 01:47 PM   #27
Zndr
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Name: Zander
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Default Re: Abusive dad is back

Its a fairly small town we are ultimately heading to, and our final bus takes us into the city. At that point the guy can leave us. From there we will have to walk a few miles to their house. I had to do all of the stuff for the guy before we left. So I prepaid I guess you could say?

I'm not leaving my brothers side. Nobody is going to fuck with him on this trip. I'll protect him. The guy doesn't like me being on my phone this much but I've told him its part of the deal and he doesn't get a choice. I'm making sure I'm in control of this situation. That's smart right?
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Old Yesterday, 02:01 PM   #28
Second Chance
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Its a fairly small town we are ultimately heading to, and our final bus takes us into the city. At that point the guy can leave us. From there we will have to walk a few miles to their house. I had to do all of the stuff for the guy before we left. So I prepaid I guess you could say?
It makes me very sad to hear that you had to do that to get help. Very rarely do posts on here make me emotional, but your situation is what really affected me. I just hope you never have to sell yourself like this ever again because it is not right by any stretch of the imagination.

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I'm not leaving my brothers side. Nobody is going to fuck with him on this trip. I'll protect him. The guy doesn't like me being on my phone this much but I've told him its part of the deal and he doesn't get a choice. I'm making sure I'm in control of this situation. That's smart right?
Having a telephone and being in control of the situation is what is right. However, try not to be on your telephone so much from this point onwards to avoid getting the guy nervous. He can do something stupid between now and when you need to part ways. Do not antagonize the situation anymore than it is.

If you have trouble on the train, then immediately go to a conductor who can get you assistance. If you have trouble at a train station, then head to any uniformed employee who will protect you. At any major train station there is the Amtrak police (https://police.amtrak.com/) who are there to protect travelers. You can even text the Amtrak Police nowadays. The following is some information from Amtrak: https://police.amtrak.com/index.php/...king-awareness

If you are on a Greyhound or Megabus, then make sure you head towards the driver if there is a problem.
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Old Yesterday, 02:45 PM   #29
Zndr
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Name: Zander
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Gender: Male
Default Re: Abusive dad is back

Don't be sad for me. I choose to keep doing this stuff. I get that selling myself isn't right, which is why I'm being so protective of my brother around this guy. I just dont see the harm in continuing it with myself now. The damage is already done. Its a useful thing for me to get what I want. Look how far its gotten us today alone.

Being on a bus, there's not much to do but stare out the window and think. I know this trip as a whole was a bad idea. I could have had a better plan. I get that part. But have I screwed up my brother mentally by doing this? I mean I'm doing all of this for him. If it was just me at home, I probably would have just put up with dad like I did before but my brother deserves better than that. He deserves to be happy. But am I a bad brother for doing this? I don't like being alone with my thoughts. I start questioning myself
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Old Yesterday, 03:13 PM   #30
Second Chance
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Don't be sad for me. I choose to keep doing this stuff. I get that selling myself isn't right, which is why I'm being so protective of my brother around this guy. I just dont see the harm in continuing it with myself now. The damage is already done. Its a useful thing for me to get what I want. Look how far its gotten us today alone.
Damage can be repaired though it will take time. What you are doing looks like what JT did at one point, but he learned it was not right and stopped doing it. It is going to take time and a lot of therapy to understand what we are telling you because those of us who have been there know the reality. To be honest, I do not think selling yourself has gotten you that far, and I know it is something that is not good for you. However, all we can do is express an opinion based upon fact, and it is up to you to chose what you do with your life. My hope is that you can get out of what you are doing because folks your age should be playing on playgrounds, hanging out with friends, playing video games, and being with family and not have to sell themselves. It is not your fault since you were taught from an early age that doing that is normal. No question I feel really sad that you were taught and that you believe that selling yourself is what you need to do to get ahead in life when that is not true. You do not deserve that, and you clearly are someone who can do a lot without having to resort to that sort of thing. You clearly are not a stupid person by any stretch of the imagination, and I think if you are in the right environment you will be able to do a lot.

If this means anything, if you think what you are doing is all right, then it is telling you do not want your Brother to have any part of it. I think you deserve the same as your Brother and to have a good childhood.

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Originally Posted by Zndr View Post
Being on a bus, there's not much to do but stare out the window and think. I know this trip as a whole was a bad idea. I could have had a better plan. I get that part. But have I screwed up my brother mentally by doing this? I mean I'm doing all of this for him. If it was just me at home, I probably would have just put up with dad like I did before but my brother deserves better than that. He deserves to be happy. But am I a bad brother for doing this? I don't like being alone with my thoughts. I start questioning myself
What you have done is now done, and you cannot undo the past.

As for screwing up your Brother mentally, I do not think you have done so because your parents have done an excellent job of that. If anything, I give you credit for caring for your Brother so much and wanting to help him. However, you cannot help him until you help yourself because you yourself have issues going on. After all, your older traveling companion with you is a clear example of that.

Personally, what I would have done had I been in your shoes is to have called social services when you were at home. That way you would have been in a strong situation and enabled your Brother to be close to home in an environment he knows.

With all of that being said second guessing you or making you feel badly is not helpful or my intention. You clearly are pretty capable for you to set up travel plans and to find out where your relatives are and try to get to them. You have good talents that can enable you to be successful in life once you get therapy and unlearn things like selling yourself and to learn that people will like you for who you are and not what you can give them.

At this stage you are heading towards your family, and I wish you Godspeed. However, if there is a problem along the way, then you have to get the police involved and make sure you and your Brother are taken into social services.

I know you have been through a lot, and perhaps you think none of us understand how you feel. Sadly, your situation has happened to others, including ourselves, which is why none of us want you to suffer in the way we have.

If things do not work out, then one thing I will give you credit for is that at least you tried to do something about your problems. While I do not necessarily agree with your way of doing so at least you have done what most people in this world do not: try to do something about the issue and resolve it.

Just remember that if anything goes wrong, then head towards the police, a bus, or railroad employee. If things do not work out as planned, then do not beat yourself up. The most important thing is that you are safe and that you get law enforcement involved if you are not safe.

Last edited by Second Chance; Yesterday at 03:47 PM. Reason: add words
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Old Yesterday, 04:11 PM   #31
Zndr
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Name: Zander
Join Date: August 2, 2020
Age: 13
Gender: Male
Default Re: Abusive dad is back

I know I should have just called social services from home. I was just worried they would come and not remove us and then dad would be so mad at us. Im just trying to be a good brother. Get him a better life. I'm not that smart since I made us run away from home across multiple states with a guy who I did it with in return for helping us get here.

This might be my last post for some hours. I'm exhausted. I've been awake since well before we started this trip. I'm going to sleep the last few hours of this bus ride and then we'll have our transfer and I might get some more sleep then if it feels safe on the train. My brother has the window seat and I have my arm around him so I feel barely comfortable enough letting myself sleep now
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Old Yesterday, 04:17 PM   #32
Second Chance
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I know I should have just called social services from home. I was just worried they would come and not remove us and then dad would be so mad at us. Im just trying to be a good brother. Get him a better life. I'm not that smart since I made us run away from home across multiple states with a guy who I did it with in return for helping us get here.
I understand why you did what you did especially with the risk that Social Services could possibly have left you at home to incur the wrath of your Father. Under those circumstances perhaps leaving was the only thing you could do since you had to take care of yourself and your Brother.

At least you tried to keep you and your Brother safe which is a very noble desire.

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This might be my last post for some hours. I'm exhausted. I've been awake since well before we started this trip. I'm going to sleep the last few hours of this bus ride and then we'll have our transfer and I might get some more sleep then if it feels safe on the train. My brother has the window seat and I have my arm around him so I feel barely comfortable enough letting myself sleep now
You should get some rest and relax at this point. There is no point in stressing out, and just take things as they come. You have made the best decision possible under the circumstances.

Just make sure you eat when you get to your transfer point and to get cleaned up if you can. You will need the energy for the final part of your journey.

Do not get discouraged, and never think of yourself as stupid when that is not the case. You seem like an all right person, and I hope you can be successful in getting into a safe place.

Get rest, and let us know how things are going along only when you feel comfortable.
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