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Old August 14th, 2004, 01:50 PM   #141
teenboy9
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Why? If you mom was going to marry a man, would be saying the same thing?
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Old August 14th, 2004, 02:31 PM   #142
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no i wouldnt, but then she wouldnt be asking me to accept her lifestyle, i never will, she ruined my young life and and wasted about 9 years of my fathers, and now shes asking me to accept it? **** that. dont talk about **** you dont understand
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Old August 14th, 2004, 04:24 PM   #143
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You need to see things from her side. Isn't she allowed to be happy?

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Old August 14th, 2004, 05:38 PM   #144
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why does she need marriage to be happy~ shes already validated her own feelings by living the way she does, i dont condemn her lifestyle, but she doesnt need a marriage and therefor shouldnt require one to be happy~ if shes not already happy in her "relationship" then theres no point in marriage, happiness does not require a ceremony, and if it does, then its false happiness, regardless of anything anyone ever tells me, ill always be against gay marriage~
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Old August 14th, 2004, 06:14 PM   #145
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Well if what you say is true, why should anyone get married? If its just a stupid ceremony? Marriage is something (hetertosexual or homosexual) people like not because they need it to be happy, but it is a way to express a loving comitment to each other that makes it feel like the two are bound to each other. I think you have been getting a lot of pain from the life your mom wants to lead. She is gay, and just like everyone else she to completly accept and love herself to be happy. The world is not always accepting, but something like this is something she NEEDS to do. You have to understand that, and work through your views, and the problems which have developed for YOU because your mom is gay. To solve YOUR problems, you need to resolve YOUR feelings about your moms life to be happy, not just stop your moms life so you can be happy.
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Old August 14th, 2004, 08:19 PM   #146
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u totally ignored my main point~ i dont mind her being happy, but does she have to shout it to the world, a wedding is something between a man and a woman and it should always be that way~ its tradition, my feelings~ i love my mother, to a point, pain? nope that was over a year after she left my father~ its simply my opinion that she shouldnt have the legal right to bring another woman into my family, i dont care if they have a get together, but im not gunna accept some woman into my family just because my mother sees fit to get "married"

i recomend you shut your mouth about things, you dont understand, happiness is not contingent upon what a piece of paper tells you your name or spouse is, if she believes it is then she obviously has no regard for those around her, my aunts, uncle etc accept her lifestyle, but i know theyd be against having that woman inducted into there family, NO one can make them accept it but they dont have a choice if marriage is allowed, create a new ceremony but i dont think they should be brought into the family of there spouse, after all, they have no genes to pass on so they dont need the family name

your "opinions" arent going to influence mine, my beliefs have been set in stone for the last 5 years, so dont try and tell me i have feelings to resolve, when ive have done so for years



me last post here~ u know my opinions
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Old August 15th, 2004, 01:49 AM   #147
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Its just kinda sad, I think its just too bad you cant understand what your mom is doing. Your post seems different then Dfsg, or others who are trying to express their beliefs, your different. I think your views come from pain. It does not have to do with screaming anything, she just wants to go on with her life, if she was marrying a man or a woman it is something she feels she needs to do. Most couples feel like that marriage is higher level of a relationship, most people want to get married, so does you mother, it has nothing to do with being gay or not. She felt like she needed to get married the first time around to your father, so it makes sense that she wants to get married again. From the way you write your posts, it SEEMS like you have been hurt, maybe just because she got divorced, or maybe you do not understand why she NEEDS to be gay?
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Old August 15th, 2004, 02:52 AM   #148
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its funny how badly your misinterpreting things, if it was pain or hate i wouldnt tell my mom i every few days or call whenever im going to be late, im perfectly friendly with her mate, we play tennis sometimes, i just dont want her to be related to me by law, they can have any ceremony they want~

stop trying to act all knowing~ your making yourself sound like an idiot
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Old August 15th, 2004, 04:41 AM   #149
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I have to ask though. What exactly are you against homosexual weddings for? You've yet to actually say why. Seems more like personal feelings rather than beliefs.
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Old August 15th, 2004, 11:04 AM   #150
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I apologize if you believed I was trying to sound "all knowing" only an idiot would talk like that. I just try to talk with what I know, and all I know is your few posts, I did not get the video with you and your moms fiancé playing tennis. You write like you are emotionally upset, thats the only reason I say these things.
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Old August 15th, 2004, 06:14 PM   #151
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jono
I have to ask though. What exactly are you against homosexual weddings for? You've yet to actually say why. Seems more like personal feelings rather than beliefs.

i dont mind living with both women, hell i dont mind having dinner with them half the time, i just don't want her in the family, its a discrace to my name,i was talking with my f.o.b. grandpa the other day and he agreed~

bottom line~ the lifestyle choice is all yours but don't force that lifestyle into someones family~

its not logical to not want her in my family, i suppose you could say its tradition or pride, two familys should not be merged unless a man and a woman are involved



So I say go ahead- love those of your same gender. Move in together, be proud of it. Just don't expect to be recognized as maried.-dsfg

^my opinion summed up i guess, i just have a little more experience
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Old August 15th, 2004, 10:57 PM   #152
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I dont think its tradition and pride. These things are things based on love, family, and bonds. That is all present here, if you love your family you should be proud of it, you cant say you will feel pride only if people in your family do specific things you like only. You say you dont "mind" living with them, or dont "mind" haveing dinner with them HALF THE TIME. You seem to be saying that you would rather not have your mom being gay. You seem to be living with how your mom is, but it does not seem like you are really accepting them.
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Old August 16th, 2004, 02:19 AM   #153
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i said half the time because i live 2 weeks with my father, two weeks with my mother, baka


and i dont "Mind" living with my father either, and pride is a personal thing,and can be in anything,whatever you believe in. and i didnt put love anywhere in there, love is to strong of a term i think, i would do anything for my mother and father if they needed it,even give my life, but i still dont call it "love", love is something that causes you to think unrationally, and in terms of black and white, i see the world in more of shades of grey, there is nothing wonderful about marriage, its simply a tradition, it would hurt noone to change that tradition, but traditions are traditions for a reason, and it would do no good to change this other then satisfying a few desires while incuring the anger of the christian religion, if there is a wedding, it should have a totally different ceremony, and god should have no presence in it. when your looking at these sort of things you have to view them in a more pragmatic way, not just on your foolish ideas of "right" and "wrong", unless you believe that your opinion is faultless,



i think traditions need to be upheld, in my family, if a male is getting married his wife is being brought into the family, if a women is getting married she is being brought into a different family, where does a gay marriage leave us, none the better, you have your way of living and ill have mine, im indeferential towards my father as i am to my mothers mate, i simply used my own expierience as an example.

and while im posting, do you agree with interfamily marriages? its letting people do what they want, and its not hurting anyone, it has the same benefits and drawbacks of gay marriage, both go against tradition, and both of them are caused purely on what people Want to do.

phew ~end rant, on a lighter note, what do you guys think of my debating skills?
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Old August 16th, 2004, 11:10 AM   #154
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Tradition is not something that is set in stone. It use to be tradition for girls to marry adult men around the age of 13. It use to be traditional to kill cattle during jewish ceremony. It use to be traditional for men to have boy sex slaves during the roman era. It also use to be tradition not to allow people who could not produce children to marry in the Christian church. Traditions are nothing more then patterns in society, pride is a feeling not an excuse to exclude. For you marriage means little, but for your mom it means a lot. If you are so concerned about marriage, why not be concerned with real problems, like the yearly divorce rate in the USA, or Reality Shows where people vote which people they see on TV get married? I can respect peoples beliefs when they come from rational thinking. But from reading your posts it seems like your beliefs com from a very irrational emotional place, and I am not the only one who thinks that. Before you cower, shielding your position under the words of tradition and pride think about where you are really coming from. I am just some guy on the internet, fuck me. REALLY look at yourself, because if you trip up now with something as important as your family, your life, no matter how good it may be will always have this tiny rotting hole.
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Old August 18th, 2004, 12:02 AM   #155
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just because something Can be changed doesnt meen they should, prohibiting gay marriage may cause a little emotional discord, but it isnt forcing young girls into marriage, slaughtering animals or using young males as sex slaves, pride Can be a feeling to exclude people, if thats how you feel you can have pride in it, japan segregated itself from the world for 150 years because they didnt want the influence of the outside world corrupting their people, japan is and always will be the nation that I most admire, they put a high value on honour, family and tradition~

Very irrational emotional place? HA, maybe if i was still 6, if my mothers lifestyle choice still effects me at all its in the fact that im stuck here arguing with a little try hard debatist who thinks about nothing but the emotions of the protagonist group, not the antagonist, and couldnt use a good example to save his life~

oh and your still excluding my main point, you cant change a religion, a tradition, fine, but to allow gay marriage would be to begin the slow dismantlement of the christian belief system, you can have any ceremony you want and have the law procaim that you are now joined as husband and husband or wife and wife, but you cant simply Change marriage because its part of a religion, hell, why not just start a totally new religion using the same beliefs of christianity~

bhuddist monks are supposed to be vegitarians, but some choose not to, they do not however press to change it so that monks dont have to be bhuddist, they simply live there own way without changing the religion, why cant the homosexual do the same thing, create a new procedure or ceremony for marriage without forcing change in one that has existed for over a millenium~


tiny rotting hole? nope actually i wouldnt feel bad or good if it became totally illegal for gay intercourse to occur, but if you havent noticed, thats just my belief and im not forcing it into anyones lives or religion, nor trying to bluntly force it into the skull of those who disagree~ why dont you do the same?
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Old August 18th, 2004, 05:36 PM   #156
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I am not trying to force you in any way, please understand that. There is no reason to start throwing mean comments around. All I am trying to express is that your mom is not forcing the Pope's (or other Christian leaders) hand over her head, and force him to marry her and her fiancé, in the hopes that for some reason that little event will bring down the church. All she wants to do is live her life, and have a closer loving relationship, bonded by love and a ceremony. (Something that almost all heterosexual couples feel like they need). I am not trying to change to force you to believe something you don’t. I am just trying to say that you many not understand it, but your mom wants this, and you should respect her for it.
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Old August 20th, 2004, 02:32 AM   #157
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yaawwnnn im done with this discussion~ i have my beliefs and nothing anyone but god tells me(and i dont believe in god) is going to change my mind~ i think the way i think is correct and thats that~

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Old August 20th, 2004, 04:13 AM   #158
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Liquidkid
yaawwnnn im done with this discussion~ i have my beliefs and nothing anyone but god tells me(and i dont believe in god) is going to change my mind~ i think the way i think is correct and thats that~

pc
Then you, my dear, are a very narrowminded person. Even the most stubborn of people should be open to changing views.
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Old August 20th, 2004, 04:14 PM   #159
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jono
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liquidkid
yaawwnnn im done with this discussion~ i have my beliefs and nothing anyone but god tells me(and i dont believe in god) is going to change my mind~ i think the way i think is correct and thats that~

pc
Then you, my dear, are a very narrowminded person. Even the most stubborn of people should be open to changing views.

an openminded person should realise that after someones thought over the same topic for 7 years, about half their life, theyre not likely to change there opinions simply because someone else thinks otherwise~

emotions can only play a part in my opinion for so long, after a while you realise what it must be like from others ppls points of views, this isnt some ill conceived conception of whats right or wrong for me~

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Old August 20th, 2004, 11:19 PM   #160
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Its not some little thing on whats right or wrong. Whats right or wrong is not what this is about. I understand that you are not going to change your mind, because you have had a life time of this, a lifetime of emotions, and a lifetime of those emotions develope into opinions. I am not here to say your wrong, or to get you to change your opinion, because these things have developed over your life, and I cant open your mind. All I am trying to say is that TRY to understand where your mom is coming from. You dont have to agree with her, but you should support her, for at least no other reason beyond she is your mother.
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