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Old October 26th, 2020, 01:28 PM   #21
Oitamara
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

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you like boys to openly confess their feelings and not leave much mystery?
I donít know, it depends on the boy
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Old October 26th, 2020, 04:03 PM   #22
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I donít know, it depends on the boy
Well to be clear i didn't mean that i don't talk at all, i can talk for hours about a lot of general stuff, but i don't share much about my feelings or my personal life. Would that change something for you?
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Old October 26th, 2020, 04:35 PM   #23
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Well to be clear i didn't mean that i don't talk at all, i can talk for hours about a lot of general stuff, but i don't share much about my feelings or my personal life. Would that change something for you?
I just don't understand why you wouldn't want to share your feelings or personal life with someone you care about, or someone who cares about you? That's kind of important in a relationship...

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Old October 26th, 2020, 04:44 PM   #24
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I just don't understand why you wouldn't want to share your feelings or personal life with someone you care about, or someone who cares about you? That's kind of important in a relationship...
Maybe because i know that will be used against me in the future. In a way i become vulnerable and i don't like that. Also i was always known as mysterious and i felt great like that so without that it would be like losing my identity. I actually don't why i would tell someone everything about me the same way as you are wondering about me.
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Old October 26th, 2020, 04:48 PM   #25
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Maybe because i know that will be used against me in the future.
But you don't know that...

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Old October 26th, 2020, 04:59 PM   #26
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But you don't know that...
but i wouldn't want to take the chance
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Old October 26th, 2020, 05:05 PM   #27
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but i wouldn't want to take the chance
Taking chances is what life is all about. Rejection and disappointment is all a part of experiencing life. And trying to avoid it at all coasts, first of all, never works...and second of all, you never learn to grow and mature and move on from it and become stronger.

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Old October 26th, 2020, 05:09 PM   #28
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

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Maybe because i know that will be used against me in the future. In a way i become vulnerable and i don't like that. Also i was always known as mysterious and i felt great like that so without that it would be like losing my identity. I actually don't why i would tell someone everything about me the same way as you are wondering about me.
You don't have to tell someone everything about you, and probably not going to get to personal for a few dates. But telling nothing I'd think you weren't bothered or interested in me. Being a mystery might be great to start with, but I'm not going to get an emotional connection if after month I don't know anything about you, and feel you don't trust me. Maybe a starting point (maybe after a few dates so you know you have some feeling for eachother) is tell her the reason why you feel this way, and how in the past things have been used against you. Then she'll know why you like you are, and if she doesn't tell people you have some proof that people can be trusted


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Old October 26th, 2020, 05:13 PM   #29
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Taking chances is what life is all about. Rejection and disappointment is all a part of experiencing life. And trying to avoid it at all coasts, first of all, never works...and second of all, you never learn to grow and mature and move on from it and become stronger.
I still believe that you don't need to share everything about you to take a chance in life and relationship. That sounds almost like someone is expecting something from you in order to like you. Like you have to tell them everything for them to like you.

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You don't have to tell someone everything about you, and probably not going to get to personal for a few dates. But telling nothing I'd think you weren't bothered or interested in me. Being a mystery might be great to start with, but I'm not going to get an emotional connection if after month I don't know anything about you, and feel you don't trust me. Maybe a starting point (maybe after a few dates so you know you have some feeling for eachother) is tell her the reason why you feel this way, and how in the past things have been used against you. Then she'll know why you like you are, and if she doesn't tell people you have some proof that people can be trusted
Ok maybe not exactly nothing but definitely not everything. Things that i want to be kept secret i wouldn't share and i don't want to feel like they want me to change just for them.

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Old October 26th, 2020, 05:27 PM   #30
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Ok maybe not exactly nothing but definitely not everything. Things that i want to be kept secret i wouldn't share and i don't want to feel like they want me to change just for them.
Why would you have to change? I understand about where you coming from with people using stuff against you (I've had that happen to me) and I'm not going to say I shared every secret I have with my ex. But he does know stuff about me no one else does, not because he wanted me to, not really because he asked, but because I loved him, and trust that he cares about me, that he would give me a hug or whatever if it made me sad and that he'd never tell anyone about it. When you get to that point in a relationship you realize they're a part of you or something and youd trust them with anything like they trust you. I know things about my ex no one (apart from possibly his future girlfriend) would ever know, and I still wouldn't break that trust ever


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Old October 26th, 2020, 05:30 PM   #31
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Why would you have to change? I understand about where you coming from with people using stuff against you (I've had that happen to me) and I'm not going to say I shared every secret I have with my ex. But he does know stuff about me no one else does, not because he wanted me to, not really because he asked, but because I loved him, and trust that he cares about me, that he would give me a hug or whatever if it made me sad and that he'd never tell anyone about it. When you get to that point in a relationship you realize they're a part of you or something and youd trust them with anything like they trust you. I know things about my ex no one (apart from possibly his future girlfriend) would ever know, and I still wouldn't break that trust ever
Because if she feels like i'm not telling her some stuff she would pressure me into telling her and would start telling me that i probably don't love her and don't trust her and i hate that.
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Old October 26th, 2020, 05:47 PM   #32
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

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Because if she feels like i'm not telling her some stuff she would pressure me into telling her and would start telling me that i probably don't love her and don't trust her and i hate that.
Why would you presume that? What thing would she want to know that would make her think you don't love her? If your not willing to share stuff you are telling her you don't trust her or love her. But if you are sharing some stuff your showing her you trust her, and she'll understand that there are things your not ready to share yet


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Old October 26th, 2020, 07:04 PM   #33
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

Tbh I think part of the problem is that you haven't met a girl you really like and really want to get to know yet. I think if you met a girl that you really clicked with, had a really good connection with you would want to open up a bit more and tell her stuff! My bf was a bit like that at first but over time he got more and more open to me!
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Old October 26th, 2020, 07:09 PM   #34
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

You should probably get tested for asperger's
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Old October 26th, 2020, 07:57 PM   #35
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Tbh I think part of the problem is that you haven't met a girl you really like and really want to get to know yet. I think if you met a girl that you really clicked with, had a really good connection with you would want to open up a bit more and tell her stuff! My bf was a bit like that at first but over time he got more and more open to me!
I think so too, i would definitely get more open with time but the point is i would still keep some things to myself and i wouldn't want her to be offended by that.

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You should probably get tested for asperger's
This is exactly what i have been saying. I just said that i'm a bit different than the majority of people and people instantly think that i'm sick or i'm some sort of a freak.

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Old Yesterday, 02:15 AM   #36
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

Hi, Just looking around there lots and lots people who have found each other when it kinda seems they never would, or it might take forever. I am kinda short and small, and there are seems to be lots of guys who like short and small girls. Guys that like tall or large girls hardly ever notice me because they are always looking at the the tall and large girls; to them I am just somebody's little sister.

One thing that is kinda of unattractive of any guy is when they first meet a girl is being overly insecure about themselves. IMO, when meeting a guy, its always very attractive that he shows some self-confidence about something. Doesn't mean he has to be bigger or faster or smart than other people, just means he feels confident about doing some things. Geeky guys often are really good at lots of things, they just don't show girls what they are good when they first meet people.

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Old Yesterday, 04:11 AM   #37
Oitamara
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Default Re: Would you girls like a guy like me?

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Well to be clear i didn't mean that i don't talk at all, i can talk for hours about a lot of general stuff, but i don't share much about my feelings or my personal life. Would that change something for you?
Itís ok, thereís many things I can like about a boy.
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Old Yesterday, 05:55 AM   #38
john2323
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Hi, Just looking around there lots and lots people who have found each other when it kinda seems they never would, or it might take forever. I am kinda short and small, and there are seems to be lots of guys who like short and small girls. Guys that like tall or large girls hardly ever notice me because they are always looking at the the tall and large girls; to them I am just somebody's little sister.

One thing that is kinda of unattractive of any guy is when they first meet a girl is being overly insecure about themselves. IMO, when meeting a guy, its always very attractive that he shows some self-confidence about something. Doesn't mean he has to be bigger or faster or smart than other people, just means he feels confident about doing some things. Geeky guys often are really good at lots of things, they just don't show girls what they are good when they first meet people.
I am confident in myself but i usually feel like no one else likes the things i like in myself so it becomes harder then. And i don't know how some guys don't even notice you, you look really pretty.
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