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Old April 5th, 2012, 03:24 PM   #1
Cicero's Forum Picture
Name: Marcus Tullius Cicero
Join Date: December 10, 2011
Location: Arpinum, Roman Republic
Gender: Male
Default OCD or not?

I've believed I'm OCD, I've looked into it and I read that OCD is strongest when your depressed and I am depressed. I also look up another disorder I think I have and the weird part is, is that all 3 disorders are connection to each other. But I've believed I'm OCD for a good 1 year now, here's the reason why...

So I've look up stuff that OCD people do, and something said they have to do "rituals" for something to go right. And I noticed I do many different rituals on certain days. So on Sunday I have to do a whole line of stuff in order for me to perfectly start the week. For me I think of Sunday as a very holy day, and in order it to be holy. I have to do certain things, if those things I do aren't done right. I feel like I wasted the day, even if one little thing went wrong, I don't find it worth it to continue trying to make it perfect so I just quit. I do the same thing on Wednesday, it has to be perfect, if I don't do something I usually like doing, the whole day is basically gonna head down hill, I feel like its a sign or whatever that it's not gonna start off good (same thing as on Monday's).

Also, I'm a bit of a phobic toward different things, I read that OCD people imagine certain phobias they have or just see them on tv, and freak out. First off is that true?
But like I'm a bit of a germaphobe, like I hate seeing spit. And if someone doesn't look absolutely perfect looking, I feel like I need to wash my hands as fast as possible or when I get the chance. I have a major fear toward most bugs, especially if they look gross or scary. Especially spiders and scorpions. Thinking about them makes me nervous. And for some odd reason (I also read that this is normal with OCD, once again is it?) I have a fear of falling and tripping. Thinking about it makes me nervous.

Also, I always have to do things on a certain number. Even with things that are expensive. So if I do something, I have to do it 5x and every time I do it I have to hit it a certain way, it has to make a certain sound, and I have to hit it a certain hardness (usually as hard as possible). If I fail at hitting it 5x, and if I don't do it within those categories (I have it have it in every category) I restart. So every time I hit it, it has to make a certain sound, be a certain spot, and hit it as hard as possible. Like a like switch. Or even dropping my phone, it has to drop flat on the ground, it cannot bounce or anything on the last 3x. I've literally done this up to 15x because I couldn't do it right.

Lastly, a lot of things have to be straight, if their not straight it bugs me.

Is this OCD?

Sorry it's so long I'm just very confused about this

*if I don't do any of those events right (other than the perfect day stuff) I get nervous, anxious, and I just can't stop thinking of it. If I just do it, it makes me feel better.
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