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Old December 28th, 2011, 04:28 PM   #2
Donkey
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Join Date: October 9, 2008
Location: England
Age: 24
Gender: Male
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Default Re: What Exactly Is Sexuality?

All credit to pmm98 for this wonderful piece of writing. Original copy located here.

HEADS UP: This is a lengthy post, however it may help you out.

Most of the time when I look through the posts that people make on this forum, I find things like "Is it normal to be turned on by guys? Am I gay?" and it frustrates me because everyone always answers, "Yes, it is normal! It's called hormones!" this is extremely true, yet people continue to make posts about it anyway.

So, that being said, I thought I would make a post for those people that continue to post about whether their normal or not or whether they are gay, straight, or bi. I'm straight myself and I have questioned/gotten curious before.

This post is meant to help people that are confused about their sexuality. So without further ado, here are some reasons that I think might hint towards a person being straight, bi or gay.

*An important thing to keep in mind is that hormones are certainly raging at this point. This mostly applies to 13 to 17 year olds, in my opinion. These are my thoughts and I respect the fact that everyone is entitled to their own opinions.

You might be gay if;

-You have no sexual attraction to girls
-You have no emotional attraction to girls
-You can't picture yourself ever being with a girl
-You find girls to be a turnoff
-You only want to do things with a guy
-You don't want to have a life with a girl
-You do want to have a life with a guy

*If your gay, most likely a part of you deep down really knows. So it is important to ask yourself if your in denial or not, because sometimes it's not so obvious. Making excuses for things is normally a sign of denial.

These are just a couple of basic things that might hint towards you being gay. These are fairly simple reasons and I covered pretty much the essential/obvious things that suggest whether you may be gay or not. Sexuality is far to complex of a thing to be summed up in a forum post.

You might be bi if;

-You have a sexual attraction to both guys and girls
-You have an emotional attraction to both guys and girls
-You can picture yourself having a life/family/house with both guys and girls
-You can picture yourself waking up next to both guys and girls
-You want to do things with both guys and girls
-You feel like you could be in a committed relationship with both guys and girls

Again, these are just a few basic, simple things that might suggest your bisexual. The things i'm listing are so basic because in most of the posts I see this is the things they seem to be dealing with.

You might be straight if;

-You have a sexual attraction to girls
-You have an emotional attraction to girls
-You can see yourself waking up next to a girl
-You can see yourself having a family/house/life with a girl
-You can see yourself doing things with a girl
-You can see yourself being in a committed relationship with a girl
-You can see yourself proposing to and marrying a girl

These are a few simple reasons suggesting that you may be straight. It's helpful to keep in mind that VERY few people, male and female, are exclusively gay or straight. Many people are somewhere in between.

You might be bicurious if;

-You have a strong sexual attraction to girls but a minor one to guys
-You have a strong emotional attraction to girls but a minor one to guys
-Seeing same-sex sex turns you on
-You truly have no clue about your sexuality. This often means your bicurious.

Those are really the only things I could think of as to why you may be bicurious.

Honestly, the most important thing to remember for those who are questioning their sexuality is that it is mainly dependent on what you want in the long run. Many scientists will argue that sexuality is not a decision, you are born with it. This may be true to an extent but it's important to realize that it is your life and you have to do what makes you happy. It is you in the relationship, you doing the things with another person. It's all about who you love, trust and feel comfortable with. So in that regard, sexuality is your choice. As a teenager, it's incredibly normal to be turned on by sex in general. No matter what it is; gay sex, straight sex, lesbian sex, oral sex, anal sex, vaginal sex any kind of sex, is sex. So it is reasonable to conclude that sex in general is what turns most people on.

I'm straight, but if I saw a naked guy I would probably get aroused. It's normal. You really can't expect much else. I've been down the road before where I had no clue about my sexuality and it truly an awful road to walk. It is full of confusion and depression. Not a fun time, in the least. All you can do is take puberty and hormones with a grain of salt and realize that even though nobody is open about it in person, most of your friends or even family members probably silently suffered through it or are currently silently suffering through it. It's normal. You probably won't really know your sexuality until you are older and are more immersed in a sexual world.

Sorry that this is so long, but I felt like I needed to get it off of my chest. Hope that I was able to help someone!

Last edited by Donkey; December 28th, 2011 at 04:32 PM.
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