Unsure...

[JaiBrazier]

I need help on this, so about 3 day's ago I tried to cut myself on one of my wrist's at that point I was in a bad state, I had multiple things running through my head. I have very low self esteem, I feel as if i'm unwanted, unseen and nobody cares about me. I feel as if i'm ugly and ... well stupid (?).
I cut my wrist as if .. without realising, I just pulled out knife and started cutting, but ... I don't know ... I just want people to care because at the moment I feel as if i'm invisible to the world and nobody see's my problems.
I have many friend's, mostly girls, saying that .. i've changed, i've gone from a happy, joking person to one of the quietest people they know but they still haven't asked what wrong.
I kinda suffer from depression. Literally everyday I feel like sh*t and like i'm nothing :/
Does anyone care?!

The last time I posted in this forum I kinda got a lot of grief, sorry if this all sounds stupid :/

Muchos Amor

[anonymous53]

People do care, have you tried talking to any of them about it? They might not be sure what to say or how to approach you about it.

[JaiBrazier]

People do care, have you tried talking to any of them about it? They might not be sure what to say or how to approach you about it.

About 3 have asked me what's wrong, but I haven't really opened up to them :/ I always seem to shout in their faces because I get so emotional about it :(

[anonymous53]

Are you close to any of them at all that you think you could actually sit down and talk to them about it? By the way. I kind of know what you mean about that

[JaiBrazier]

Probably not, not face to face at least. About 3 people have seen my scars on my wrist (all close friends) and have questioned me, I've just quickly changed the subject but they probably know what I've been doing but don't know how to bring it up..

By the way, I have P.E tomorrow and I have to wear a short sleeved shirt, is there anyway I could .. hide my wrist or something? We're not permitted anything on out wrist unless it's medical wise, I have a bandage on it now and if anyone see's it i'm saying I burnt myself or something .. but i'm sure it'll raise a lot of questions in school if people saw it and could lead to bullying :/

[anonymous53]

Well, since you have to hide it I'll quote from another thread yesterday posted by LoveLikeWinter. Like they say, best solution is to stop, I know it's not that easy. If someone asks you about it say you fell or something. If you can't talk to a friend face to face about the issues try the internet, or if there are any adults you can trust..

Let me be repetitive:

Best is to not do it. But ya know what? I know how it goes. Stopping isn't that easy, so it's probably a bit silly to point out the obvious.

We ALL have been through that at some point or another, most likely. Hiding it is a big problem you have to face. And it is hard, and can be embaressing, and blah blah blah. Shall I share what I do?

I work at Subway. I have to wear short sleeves. I know I SHOULDN'T cut my arms but sometimes I can't not. So I use a really thick facial base over them and then a bit of powder and some concealer. Spray hairspray on it so it doesn't melt off.

They make shirts that are partially long sleeved and go down just below the elbows if you cut further up the arm---
I wear a super thin over-jacket like thing all the time. It only goes to just below my elbows and isn't thick nor does it close in any way. It's just to cover my shoulder and what not.

A better solution? Stop doing it on your arms. There are other places. Less dangerous places...

And, once again...

Not at all!?

[JaiBrazier]

thanks a million seriously, but it'll be at least a week or so before they go. I guess i'll have to make up an excuse or something ... I think two people have figured but i'll just .. come clean since they are pretty good friends or make up something.

Thanks a lot anyways, I'll try to stop and not do it again ... I might go get some anti-depressants from my GP and stuff soo .. yeah thanks :)

btw, I love MCR :D

[anonymous53]

I hope you feel better and everything works :) and yes....MCR is amazing.

[JaiBrazier]

Thanks :) & I may be seeing them live this year :P

[Fiction]

OMG YOU'RE FROM NOTTINGHAM :O :O Ermm yeah me too :D

Anyways... You should try talking to your friends. I've found that finding a supportive friend can help more than anything else, even professional help. Professional help can make things better for you though so maybe you should talk to your parents about this? I know it's hard. I never had the guts to do it, my parents found out after I ended up in hospital after an overdose. That's not the best way to do it. I wish now that i'd had the courage to tell them before hand. If not maybe you could go and see a school councillor or go and see a doctor yourself?

Feel free to pm me if you want to talk :)