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View Full Version : Cure for restless legs syndrome lies in masturbation


mrmcdonaldduck
April 1st, 2011, 06:53 AM
Dopamines relieve RLS
Ejaculation releases dopamines
Connect the dots
SOME say it makes you go blind. Others reply that hey, the lights are out anyway, and I need some sleep.
Yes, we're talking about masturbation. And later, about how doing it more often can be good for your health.
Particularly if you suffer from Restless Leg Syndrome - a condition that causes as much consternation in scientific circles as it does to those who claim to suffer from it.
Restless Leg Syndrome - RLS - is characterised by an irresistable urge in the limbs to move or spasm.
As the name suggests, it mainly affects the legs, and is at its most active when the sufferer is trying to sleep.
The tickling or burning sensation builds up until the affected limb spasms, then settles only to build up again.
It's not unusual for people who suffer RLS - which has a wide range of effects - to describe it as torturous
The scientific community is not so easily convinced. The cause of any individual's RLS is difficult to diagnose and treatments can range from relaxation techniques to cutting down on coffee to increasing physical exercise.
Of particular concern is the potential for pharmaceutical companies to develop and promote drugs that "cure" RLS online and through backing RLS support groups.
Some of the drugs have been proven effective and are endorsed by government agencies. One such line of drugs includes dopamines.

Fortunately, the body can produce a ready supply of dopamine, something which Luis Martin and his colleagues at Sao Paulo's Federal University have decided to, er, investigate further.
Here's comes the bit about masturbation.
In this month's edition of Sleep Science, Prof Marin points to study results from the University of Groningen in The Netherlands, which shows ejaculation in men swamping their brains with dopamines.
"Manual penile stimulation was performed by the volunteer's female partner," the study says, with the end goal producing "a wide variety of rewarding behaviors".
"Parallels are drawn between ejaculation and heroin rush," it concludes.
Prof Luis says this seems like a simple way for men to reproduce the effects of RLS treatment drugs, without the cost and side effects of using dopamine agonists, one of which is, bizarrely, problem gambling.
So if you find yourself in bed jerking spasmodically and unable to get to sleep, why not go with the flow?
A quick hand shandy certainly never hurt anyone and, hey, it may even take your mind off the slots.


Read more: http://www.news.com.au/technology/sci-tech/sick-of-jerking-in-bed-try-masturbating/story-fn5fsgyc-1226031963818#ixzz1IGu4c900



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Nice.

Amnesiac
April 1st, 2011, 05:16 PM
More like Restless Dick Syndrome, amirite?

Syvelocin
April 1st, 2011, 06:57 PM
Great. What do the girlies with RLS do then? :/ This seems to be just referring to male masturbation. Even then, I would prefer using medication to this one hundred times over, even if it did work for girls.
My meds I was on made be wake up at the same time every night with nausea, so I'm off of them, and I just do sleep meds to put me to sleep quicker. I'm screwed during aeroplane flights however.

Might I mention also, that yes, it's how the article is written, but RLS doesn't exactly mean you have leg spasms. I have this intense crawling, tingling under my skin, which can happen in my legs, arms, even my shoulders, and the only way to relieve it for a period of time is by moving that part of your body. The feeling will return shortly after that though. No, it isn't pins and needles, the feeling is much different to that, and there's nothing directly causing it though it usually happens in the evening, as well as long car rides and aeroplane rides.

User Deleted
April 1st, 2011, 07:06 PM
More like Restless Dick Syndrome, amirite?

no kidding!

Trevoooor
April 2nd, 2011, 03:45 PM
Ehh. If this was true, NO man in the world would have restless leg syndrome. :D

Azunite
April 3rd, 2011, 02:23 AM
I just came

Continuum
April 3rd, 2011, 02:27 AM
I just came

http://unrealitymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/jizz-in-my-pants-andy-samberg1.jpg

In your pants? :D

Azunite
April 3rd, 2011, 09:43 AM
I would rather use the "j-word" in more private places :P

Memory
April 3rd, 2011, 10:18 AM
http://i793.photobucket.com/albums/yy213/skull_link/must-not-fap.jpg