Syvelocin
March 11th, 2011, 01:05 AM
Goddamn.
The only issue I have with not being straight, is that I have to face double the issues.
I've just admitted to myself that I'm attracted to this girl, and this girl isn't into girls (yet, anyway, though I'll get to that later), AND she's my BEST, best friend.
http://cur.cursors-4u.net/smilies/images1/smi20.gif
What could be fucking worse?
Oh, that I'm married? :P
It's just that... I have this urge to tell her, "My god, your gorgeous. I have a major crush on everything about you." Then what comes to mind? That we've been friends for fourteen years. It doesn't bother me to say that to a girl and find out that she's straight nearly as much as it would to say that to her and BOTH find out she's not interested and ruin our friendship.
The only thing is, the reason why I want to say that so badly, is because she confided in me that she's curious. But I can't do... god...
And she's my age. Fuck, when was I ever attracted to anyone my age?
I saw her new profile pic on Facebook and... wow. I don't know. I didn't feel quite this way when we got together for a little reunion when I went back home for Christmas. I was questioning maybe a baby attraction to her. Now... *sigh*
She's not like most girls. She's a great friend, a brilliant mind, a "rare beauty" as well, you could say. She doesn't look like any other girl, or any girl I'm attracted to for that matter. But there's something about her...
This is the only reason I have ever hated my sexuality.
Yep, this is just a vent post.
You could say there's more than a little problem that I am only emotionally attracted to guys, while I'm fully attracted to girls, actually. I said otherwise in the post I made, that got erased in the server move however. Because I'd call this angst at this point.
The only issue I have with not being straight, is that I have to face double the issues.
I've just admitted to myself that I'm attracted to this girl, and this girl isn't into girls (yet, anyway, though I'll get to that later), AND she's my BEST, best friend.
http://cur.cursors-4u.net/smilies/images1/smi20.gif
What could be fucking worse?
Oh, that I'm married? :P
It's just that... I have this urge to tell her, "My god, your gorgeous. I have a major crush on everything about you." Then what comes to mind? That we've been friends for fourteen years. It doesn't bother me to say that to a girl and find out that she's straight nearly as much as it would to say that to her and BOTH find out she's not interested and ruin our friendship.
The only thing is, the reason why I want to say that so badly, is because she confided in me that she's curious. But I can't do... god...
And she's my age. Fuck, when was I ever attracted to anyone my age?
I saw her new profile pic on Facebook and... wow. I don't know. I didn't feel quite this way when we got together for a little reunion when I went back home for Christmas. I was questioning maybe a baby attraction to her. Now... *sigh*
She's not like most girls. She's a great friend, a brilliant mind, a "rare beauty" as well, you could say. She doesn't look like any other girl, or any girl I'm attracted to for that matter. But there's something about her...
This is the only reason I have ever hated my sexuality.
Yep, this is just a vent post.
You could say there's more than a little problem that I am only emotionally attracted to guys, while I'm fully attracted to girls, actually. I said otherwise in the post I made, that got erased in the server move however. Because I'd call this angst at this point.