I wanna stop, But it helps?

[MyRedHeadWorld]

I thought I posted this but I ovs didnt...
Basically, I self harm myself, It helps me when Im stressed :/ And one of my mates smokes when shes stressed. I want her to stop, and she wants me to stop. I know its gunna be hard for both of us, shes doing alright, But Me. Not so good...I really want to do it, But I oviasly cant really carry on like this?! but for some reson it does help me calm down? and this may sound weird but I like the pain?
Is there anything I can do? Maybe something I can substatute it with? :S

[jack_dawkins]

A friend of my wear rubber bands on his wrist, and well "pop" or "snap" them. when he feels stressed. It seems to help him.

[LoveMe_HateMe]

I know that feeling, I both self harm AND smoke when I'm stressed. Its not good :/

It helps me calm down too, and I like the pain of it as well... But I'm not gonna go into that.

Things to do instead of self harming... Hold an ice cube, flick an elastic band against your wrist. I've heard other people say that they get red ink/water colour etc and draw on themselves. Ripped up pieces of paper. Took up hobbies. Do things that take your mind of it, like I listen to music and read. Both work great.. for me anyway, they might work for you.

Good luck :) here if you ever need to talk.

[jack straw]

As a recovered cutter, I can honestly say it hurts more than it helps. It is a bit of a sickly sweet rush when the pain comes, but in the long run it always made me feel guilty and bad about myself. So one day, at school in gym class, we all went to the weight room. it was a 40 minuets that changed my life. It was a frustrating day, and I was ready to explode. went to an open machine, and just started working out. pushed all my frustration out through my muscles. by the endof the period I was exhausted, and my whole body felt like rubber. But I felt clean on the inside for the first time in months. The next day I was in a good bit of pain, a new kind of pain; a whole body ache, with a whole new kind of rush. Since then I've been working out pretty faithfully, never cut again. kept the knife as a reminder of where I had been, and where I was never gonna go back to. I have so much more energy, I feel great, and I'm more outgoing. But, on a side note, let me say I still dread working out. I'm not a meat head by any means, but I still get that rush, which is part of what keeps me going. And the ladies love it, so thats always a plus ;)

Now if you absolutely hate working out (and I cant blame you) here are a few other suggestions

learn an instrument. ITS NOT AS HARD AS YOU THINK. I always thought guitar was complicated and required some sort of magical skill. Until one day I told myself I was gonna learn guitar, not gonna quit. 4 months later, I aint half bad. Been teaching myself too.

Find a hobby. Personally I like fishing. You might enjoy birdwatching. Underwater basket weaving. stamp collecting. Kite flying. quantum physics. target shooting. moonshine making. theres a whole world of things that you could do. Preferably something outdoors, with fresh air and sunlight but anything will do. Write poetry, or short stories, or something.


The key is to get yourself doing something. Once you find something that works, quitting isnt that hard. Robert Downy Jr. Once said "Quitting isnt hard. It's deciding in your heart that you really do want to quit".
Right now, hurting yourself may calm you down, and you know you need to stop but just cant. Find something to trasfer those feelings to, and you wont have a problem. Good luck, my friend. And good luck to your smoker friend too.

[Mike321]

I know how you feel when you say it helps to calm you down, it does the same for me. But if you and your friend are trying to stop your addictions, I think it makes it a little easier knowing someone else is trying to stop too.
As for alternatives to cutting there are some really good ones mentioned in this post and on this site, so give some of those a try and see which ones work best for you, personally I have found the elastic band one worked best for me.
Hope this helps

[Craig1995]

Yeah I wear an elastic band and snap it against my wrist. It works for some people but not me. I need to see blood for some reason. Yeah that sounds weird but yeah. You should try the elastic band thing it does work for some peeps. And everyone gets there in the end. Just some times peeps need a wee bit of help. :)