Im going insane.

[XxMurderedKissesxX]

Deeper
Longer
Blood everywhere.

Everyday I follow this routine. But now its getting dangerous. I try for more shallow, smaller cuts, but it does nothing for me. All I hear is "If your going to punish yourself, atleast do it right...Idiot" Im stuck, im trying to help someone else stop, but I cant even go a day myself. Im such a fucking hippocrate. I hate myself. I just want to end, everything. It would be so easy. I thought I was getting better. HA! Ive been dragged back down to this hell like time after time. Ill never be free from this demon that is self mutilation. One minute I like it, love it. The blood, the pain, the scars. The next I dispise it, my scars repulse me, i feel guilty & ashamed..Wtf is wrong with me?

[Quahog]

It doesn't make you a hypocrite. You are just trying to help someone, so they don't end up in your situation. So don't feel bad, and don't think of yourself as a hypocrite, because you are telling someone not to cut, but you are a cutter who can't quit yourself. So don't put yourself down over that. You are not a hypocrite. You just want to help them. Even though you are not cutting yourself, as harshly as you were before, it's still cutting. There are still going to scars present. I want to help you.

You should post in the Non self harm calender. I have some distractions that you might want to try. I was in your same situation, and so have lots others, so we all can help you here. Have you tried writing your problems down? Or drawing? Taken up doing exercise? I also heard that putting a rubber band on your wrist can help you stop your urges. Every day that you don't pick up the blade, and hurt yourself is an accomplishment. It isn't going to be easy, but I want to help you through this. I know many more distractions that you can try. Whenever you want to talk, or if you don't feel you can go on, just come here and tell us. I don't want anything bad to happen to you, and I just want to help. Don't be afraid to talk to us.

[xgeekyrocksx]

Helping someone else stop makes you forget, that's how it works for me anyway. You're not a hypocrite- you just need to sort some things out for yourself. I think it's a really nice thing that you're helping someone :) I see what you mean when you say the shallow cuts dont do anything, but you could try cutting less each day. or maybe more gradually? i know how you feel, but i'm not very good at giving advice :/ sorry x