Habits

[Syvelocin]

So, well... I was eating some pretzels, those 100 mini bags you know? And then Jay asks me "Why to you open them like that?" I didn't know what he meant. "Like how?" He goes, "Well, you bite the side and then tear open the top instead of the normal way, grabbing the sides and pulling it open." I didn't really notice I did this, but I've realized I do. It makes much less noise than opening it the other way.

I used to do that so I could avoid other people in the house hearing me eating. I couldn't stand people knowing when I do eat. All my garbage, I would put in my pockets and throw it away in my bin in my room, instead of the bin in the kitchen where people could see what I've eaten.

I still hate eating around people as well. I lose my appetite majorly.

I'm still like this apparently, but I'm not on my old portion sizes anymore. I'm half-recovered. I don't think it's hiding it from Jay, but just old habits.

Is/was anyone else like this? That secretive with what you eat? It seems stupid in my head right now, but I can't stop doing those things.

[Fiction]

Yes. When I do eat, I hate the fact that the wrapper will be in my bin. I hate anyone who looks in my bin being able to see that i've eaten, and what i've eaten. I also hate eating anything unhealthy in front of people still. I always think they'll be judging me, even when i'm in a binging type phase.

[Nevermore]

I am the same way. It's hard for me to eat in front of people. I'm actually leaving soon to see my psychologist whose forcing me to eat in front of her. I hate having wrappers and things near me. In school if I buy food I usually hide the wrapper in my bag. At home I throw it out when no one is home or in my room. If I am desperate I'll throw it away in the bathroom. I'm still on my portion sizes. I feel like a mouse or an animal, who has to hide and eat it's food. I feel like people are watching me and making fun of me if I eat even a salad. It gets annoying to me because I don't want to be like this, but I still am full of eating habbits.

[Fact]

So, well... I was eating some pretzels, those 100 mini bags you know? And then Jay asks me "Why to you open them like that?" I didn't know what he meant. "Like how?" He goes, "Well, you bite the side and then tear open the top instead of the normal way, grabbing the sides and pulling it open." I didn't really notice I did this, but I've realized I do. It makes much less noise than opening it the other way.

I used to do that so I could avoid other people in the house hearing me eating. I couldn't stand people knowing when I do eat. All my garbage, I would put in my pockets and throw it away in my bin in my room, instead of the bin in the kitchen where people could see what I've eaten.

I still hate eating around people as well. I lose my appetite majorly.

I'm still like this apparently, but I'm not on my old portion sizes anymore. I'm half-recovered. I don't think it's hiding it from Jay, but just old habits.

Is/was anyone else like this? That secretive with what you eat? It seems stupid in my head right now, but I can't stop doing those things.

I don't have an eating disorder, but I understand what you mean about wanting to be secretive and having habits that just don't go away.

I used to have a habit of counting things that I ate and then writing it down. Not calories, just numerical values - pieces or spoonfuls of things. It was somewhat therapeutic and a personal thing, which I guess is what it feels like to keep what you've eaten hidden away from others?

It's nothing much to be concerned about unless it triggers other problems, through memories etc.
There's nothing much wrong with holding onto a few harmless idiosyncrasies to keep you sane ^_^.