gerardlynz
February 22nd, 2011, 03:20 AM
First of all I think I should tell you how it started.
I was 5 years old, I had done something stupid like every kid dose, my dad got angry and hit me for the first and last time, he goes on pills now.
Some years later when I was 11 I accsidently put yellow color on a classmates jaket, he got really angry and when I was on my way home (it was a friday) he kicked me, and pushed me onto the wall. I started to cry and my bff told him to leave me the hell alone! On monday I told my teacher, the teacher had a meeting with me and the classmate. My teacher said: why did you do it? My classmate: He did it too! Then he just walked away! And the other guy, "his friend" had to beg for my forgivness, while he was standing on his knees. While my classmate didnt even say sorry. The same year a girl called me poor. When I was 13 I got beat up by some guys, the girls ignored me, I was all alone.
The boys painted me naked (really ugly btw), kicked me, put a note on my back where it stand: kill me!!In a museum I almost got raped! I cried myself to sleep, I thought about killing myself, couse who would care if I died anyway?! Then I moved to Norway, it saved me from suicide and it was good a while. Until I heard that people where talking behind my back. The were to much of cowards to tell me anything face to face. So instead they broke me down on facebook. A guy wrote: ur so ugly, go to hell! you suck bitch, midget! and stuff like that! Now Im 16 (17 in august) and in the autum vaccation, the same guy and his "gang" said: your so ugly, everyone hates you, and just want you to die!! heng yourself, or we heng you! Your worthless, I bet your own parents are ashamed of you! I cried, but now! For the first time, I told evey single one of them how much they hurted me. Sinice then they havent bothered me! But I get flashbacks, and its a lot of fights in my home. Now I have been cutting for almost 2 months. I told the doctor about it, and Im going to get help at some hospital!
I was 5 years old, I had done something stupid like every kid dose, my dad got angry and hit me for the first and last time, he goes on pills now.
Some years later when I was 11 I accsidently put yellow color on a classmates jaket, he got really angry and when I was on my way home (it was a friday) he kicked me, and pushed me onto the wall. I started to cry and my bff told him to leave me the hell alone! On monday I told my teacher, the teacher had a meeting with me and the classmate. My teacher said: why did you do it? My classmate: He did it too! Then he just walked away! And the other guy, "his friend" had to beg for my forgivness, while he was standing on his knees. While my classmate didnt even say sorry. The same year a girl called me poor. When I was 13 I got beat up by some guys, the girls ignored me, I was all alone.
The boys painted me naked (really ugly btw), kicked me, put a note on my back where it stand: kill me!!In a museum I almost got raped! I cried myself to sleep, I thought about killing myself, couse who would care if I died anyway?! Then I moved to Norway, it saved me from suicide and it was good a while. Until I heard that people where talking behind my back. The were to much of cowards to tell me anything face to face. So instead they broke me down on facebook. A guy wrote: ur so ugly, go to hell! you suck bitch, midget! and stuff like that! Now Im 16 (17 in august) and in the autum vaccation, the same guy and his "gang" said: your so ugly, everyone hates you, and just want you to die!! heng yourself, or we heng you! Your worthless, I bet your own parents are ashamed of you! I cried, but now! For the first time, I told evey single one of them how much they hurted me. Sinice then they havent bothered me! But I get flashbacks, and its a lot of fights in my home. Now I have been cutting for almost 2 months. I told the doctor about it, and Im going to get help at some hospital!