Over this shit life

[Dark_Hellfire]

Over the past month I have had my life collapse into nothingness. I sit around day in and day out watching friends turn away and decided I am not worth being friends with. I get online to talk to those who I still have, and then cop more shit from them as well.

I am sick and fed up with always trying to be the good guy. Always just letting how they treat me slide and being nice to them, only to fear the next time they are going to become bitches and snap.

I am getting fed up with living a life full of being a last resort friend. I am sick of living a life that is full of "friends" abuse that I can't even escape online.

And more then anything I am sick of a life where no matter what I do, I am never good enough for anyone.

I am really beginning to think that a world without Dartz would be a world of joy. At least if I am not around, people wont have to bother trying to treat me like shit, wont have to abuse me online and wont have to worry that there life is being contaminated by me

[Magus]

Over the past month I have had my life collapse into nothingness. I sit around day in and day out watching friends turn away and decided I am not worth being friends with.
I will say something about off-line friends. I don't know if I should label myself "lucky", I still have one friend out of many, that I actually consider as a friend. Someone who can comfort me, to back me up.

But I have learned a bit about friends: They opportunist, treacherous, back-biting people; they snitch, and negatively talk behind your back-- they are not my friends. I slowly started leaving them, drop by drop without causing a commotion.


I am sick and fed up with always trying to be the good guy. Always just letting how they treat me slide and being nice to them, only to fear the next time they are going to become bitches and snap.Been there, done that. That's life, my friend. In this time and age, being the Nice guy is probably the hardest and most unappreciated job. You know, these aren't people. If they don't treat you right, then what you have got to lose if you leave them?


And more then anything I am sick of a life where no matter what I do, I am never good enough for anyone.See, you are who you are naturally. You don't need to change yourself to make sure everyone cuddles you.

If they can't handle who you are, whomever they may be, then they are not worthy of your presence amongst them.



I am really beginning to think that a world without Dartz would be a world of joy. At least if I am not around, people wont have to bother trying to treat me like shitI said the samething "What's the world going to lose if faris leaves it? Parents won't miss me, I don't have friends to miss me. So, what the fuck".

Yes, I had suicidal thoughts, but never acted upon them. I said... oh, what the fuck. I have one life. Should I waste it for trivial thing such as those bastards? No.

You see, even prodigies are raised without having friends.

I always say this. Friends are like a mirror; they reflect on who you truly are. If they can't do that, then they are not your friends.

Yes, I have lived in seclusion ever since. But now, I can easily plan for my self without needless distractions.

I am not telling you to abandon your friends. All I am saying, if you want something right, then pick the path that makes you the most comfortable.

Sure, my life as a loner is a hard one. But with all honesty, it offers me a fake and brief comfort, which is a lot better than being hurt needlessly.

[Dark_Hellfire]

I always say this. Friends are like a mirror; they reflect on who you truly are. If they can't do that, then they are not your friends.

Yes, I have lived in seclusion ever since. But now, I can easily plan for my self without needless distractions.

I am not telling you to abandon your friends. All I am saying, if you want something right, then pick the path that makes you the most comfortable.



You are right, but my biggest issue is I can't let go of these friends who are doing this too me. I fear being alone far to much

[Magus]

I can't let go of these friends who are doing this too me. I fear being alone far to muchWell, that's a sacrifice you have to give. And I believe that there will be a time when true friends do come, maybe it's not this time.

[Dark_Hellfire]

Well things took a turn for the worse and I was admitted to hospital yesterday. I am kind of glad I am in here though, least I can be watched and such. Had a friend rush up when he heard so that meant a lot

[Magus]

Had a friend rush up when he heard so that meant a lotWell, embrace that friend. He might be the one. ;)

[canyon]

Over the past month I have had my life collapse into nothingness. I sit around day in and day out watching friends turn away and decided I am not worth being friends with. I get online to talk to those who I still have, and then cop more shit from them as well.

If they treat you like this, then they aren't your real friends. There's nothing wrong with ignoring the people who make you feel this way. If they ever ask why, tell them how you're really feeling; don't just say 'nothing'.

I am sick and fed up with always trying to be the good guy. Always just letting how they treat me slide and being nice to them, only to fear the next time they are going to become bitches and snap.
Don't worry about what will happen in the future. If you spend too much time worrying about them turning against you, you're not being fair to them. Give them the benefit of the doubt, but take it away the minute they start treating you less than fairly. You never know which friends will stick with you and which will leave you.

I am getting fed up with living a life full of being a last resort friend. I am sick of living a life that is full of "friends" abuse that I can't even escape online.
If you don't want to be friends with them, don't. Don't feel bad about quitting the friendship if they're making you feel bad. They'll come to you and ask why, and you tell them. As to the online friends, ignore them for a while and see if they come around. If not, they weren't your friend to begin with.

And more then anything I am sick of a life where no matter what I do, I am never good enough for anyone.
Who says you're not good enough? Someone out there thinks that you're good enough for them, even if you don't know it yet. Don't worry about lying about who you are in order to make friends, because that just sets you up for more situations like this. You lie to get a friend, you become friends, and then once you start acting like the real you, they don't like it. And it's not their fault, either. They befriended you because they thought they knew you. Lying to them to befriend them is your fault, so you can't get mad at them for thinking you were someone else.

I am really beginning to think that a world without Dartz would be a world of joy. At least if I am not around, people wont have to bother trying to treat me like shit, wont have to abuse me online and wont have to worry that there life is being contaminated by me
Why would you think that it would be a world of joy? If anything, you're just giving into what your 'friends' want. People only treat you like shit because you let them. Stand up to them, and I guarantee that they'll stop. Either that or just stop being friends with them. If they're making you feel this bad, the friendship isn't worth it. As for the people abusing you online, this is kind of easier to deal with. Just ignore them. Delete their messages, block them from wherever you go online, anything. Don't give in to their demands. If they were a true friend, they would stop making you feel like this.

I know some of my advice was kinda geared towards you, but you needed to hear it. Don't pretend to be someone that you're not just to get friends because it'll just bite you in the butt. Those people are your friend because they believe the lies that you told them. And if they find out you were lying, they have a right to be mad. They thought they knew you, and you based your friendship on lies.

Either way, I hope everything works out for you. Don't let people walk all over you, because it sucks. Stand up to them, and maybe they'll back off. If they do, great. If not, they weren't your friends to begin with.

[Dark_Hellfire]

Never lied to them about who I was or anything else. What I meant by "nothing I do is good enough" is that they always tell me how crap I am at something no matter how hard I try. Stuff like maths, skating etc.

I would never even think for a second on lying to someone just to make them like me more. Its deceptive and just plain wrong.

But thank you for your reply, it means a lot and is helping me look over a lot of things :)