Friend Who's Abused?

[ScarredEclipse]

My best friend is abused, and I'm not. I really need advice on how to treat her when she's upset about it. I'm not exactly sure how she feels, so it's hard for me to know her sensitivity range. Advice?

[heykay]

If it's bad, I'd tell someone about it to help. There's not much you can do if it's a family sort of problem but get help from someone else such as a counselor, or if it's bad enough, the police.

[Quahog]

Support her. Tell her to tell someone, or tell someone yourself if she won't. Be there for her, Comfort her. The worst thing you can do is ignore it.

[Fushigi]

just be there when she needs u... give her a shoulder to cry on... :D and support her always :)

[Charleigh]

If it's bad, I'd tell someone about it to help. There's not much you can do if it's a family sort of problem but get help from someone else such as a counselor, or if it's bad enough, the police.

Any kind of abuse should be reported. Bad or not, report it.

Just be there for them, tell them everything is ok and you will be there for them no matter what. Try and encourage them to seek help about it. Nobody should have to hide abuse, tell someone.

[Weeping]

Be there for her, no mather what! And don't tell someone if she doesn't wan't (you) to. If she tell you such a thing, it probably means that she trust you a lot, and it'll be freaking 'hellish' for her if you tell someone without her willing. Though, make sure that she knows you'll be there as support and help if she wan't to tell somebody.
You can PM me or something if you wan't to talk further about this! (:

[Quick_Sylver]

What kind of abuse? Yes, all abuse needs to be reported, but depending on the abuse, she might need to be gotten out of there. In that case, see if your mom would let her spend a lot of time at your place, try and keep her upbeat, tell her how awesome she is, and try and put a wedge between her and who's abusing her.

[ScarredEclipse]

Thanks guys, that's really great advice. (:

[Myrnodin]

Any kind of abuse should be reported. Bad or not, report it.

Just be there for them, tell them everything is ok and you will be there for them no matter what. Try and encourage them to seek help about it. Nobody should have to hide abuse, tell someone.


I agree with CharlieGirl here. It has to be reported independently of how severe it is. Yes, shes trusting you by telling you, and thats why you have to be careful of who are you going to tell to, but keeping it secret is not a way of helping her, but actually making it worse. Dont be afraid to intervene, she will thank you once its over; but if you keep quiet, it may not even end. Think of it.

- Josh.

[cheergurl]

You're sort of doing her harm by not telling someone. Even if you lose the friendship you have to protect her. Tell someone like a teacher or the police now. When you talk to her, just tell her you love her and just listen :)

[Triceratops]

My best friend has been raped and she asked me to swear that I would not tell anyone. She said that it all happened years ago and that she hasn't even told her parents yet, so for her to tell me only just goes to shows how much she trusts me.

Tbh, I think it's her responsibility to tell whoever else she feels she needs to tell. If I were in her shoes, I would be so fucking mad if the person I had told IN CONFIDENCE blabbed about it.

Even if you lose the friendship you have to protect her.

Depends on how close friends you are to them.
If it was my bestest friend, I don't think I could disagree with what you've just said any more than I already do. :/

OP, if I were you I would talk to her about it and encourage her to go and see someone to get this solved. Offer to go with her as well.

[Mario T]

whats the difference between child abuse and discipline??

[suza23]

I wouldn't tell anyone if i were you we all know how it will end. She wont get help and she wont ever talk to you again.

You need to talk her into getting help. Or just support her if she doesn't want to.