Dealing with it!

[bluedreams]

I have a small problem, my Dad both knows that I am bi and is quite happy with it and has said as long as it stays my choice he's okay with it. My mother on the other hand is a problem I have tried many a time to tell her that I am bi yet every time she has shot me down saying that I haven't seen enought of the world to make a choice on how I feel, Its why when I had a girlfriend I could only talk to my Dad about it. I just want to know how other people have dealt with what I am and how they told a parent or parents that where agenst there sexuality that they were gay or bi?

I don't want to have to keep a part if me a secret, and for those of you that have to how do you deal with it!?

[Contra]

I'm not bi, so I don't have to deal with a situation like this, but I just thought I could help you. I suggest that your father should talk to your mother and convince her that you can make your decisions and your feelings are up to you. Or if you feel confident enough to do it, you could do it yourself.

Anyways, even though your mother doesn't accept your sexual orientation, you shouldn't worry about it and keep living your life your own way. Good luck! :)

[ajackson9523]

im on the same boat as u. but i cant tell n e of my parents that im bi because they r hardcore christians. and like if something comes on tv or they see 2 males or 2 females together kissing or whatever they look at them n say that thats bad or that its discusting. sorry i dont have advice but atleast u dont have it quite as bad :)

[nick]

There isnt much you can do to change your mother's view, hopefully as time goes on she will come to realise that it isnt just a phase and its a part of who you are. Its good that your father is more understanding, some people have two unhelpful parents to cope with. I've been luck myself, I live with my dad and he has been just great.

[bluedreams]

Thank you for the help, I know I'm lucky that I have my dad to talk to, and I understand the christian problem both my mother and Gran are so we're in the same boat for that too. I know how it feels. I do wish that my dad could talk to my mum but with them be divorced it doesn't look like thats going to happen any time soon. However I do hope that I my self will be able to tell her. Thank you again for the advice, it was greatly needed and recived and also thank you for letting me know that I'm not alone on this! Thank you!

[Sosaku]

i told my mom that i'm gay, and she said that it is only because i'm scared of being hurt by girls....but i cant tell my dad....so i'm screwed

[OutOfOrder]

Um, so I'm not bi (I think?) so I haven't had to go through this, but I would think that you could talk to your dad to try to convince your mom that this took a lot of time and courage to say and that she should respect who you are. It's not like you choose to be something, it's just how it happened. As long as you are happy with what you are, then others around you should be too.

[ccrunner]

when my parents found out i was curious they flipped but where i come from that is unexceptable and now its ok just maybe say ok mom your right ill think about it and its more of a big deal if your the only boy because she doesnt want her baby boy anything less than perfect

[Sosaku]

when my parents found out i was curious they flipped but where i come from that is unexceptable and now its ok just maybe say ok mom your right ill think about it and its more of a big deal if your the only boy because she doesnt want her baby boy anything less than perfect

I see what you are saying...(however i didn't at first) but "anything less than perfect" isn't really a good choice of words...i took it the wrong way initially...but i rememeber being told this so...yea....just kind of clarifying...(even though i didn't explain...i digress..)

[greekboy]

I have a small problem, my Dad both knows that I am bi and is quite happy with it and has said as long as it stays my choice he's okay with it. My mother on the other hand is a problem I have tried many a time to tell her that I am bi yet every time she has shot me down saying that I haven't seen enought of the world to make a choice on how I feel, Its why when I had a girlfriend I could only talk to my Dad about it. I just want to know how other people have dealt with what I am and how they told a parent or parents that where agenst there sexuality that they were gay or bi?

I don't want to have to keep a part if me a secret, and for those of you that have to how do you deal with it!?

I haven't had to experience this but I can understand the problem that this causes you. Although she is not accepting your decision it is not a secret any more within the family so you should be able to keep discussing the subject with her until her attitude changes. She probably thinks that she is just protecting you. She may think that if she doesn't accept it then it is not real. It's going to be an uphill struggle, but remember, she is your Mother, so we are talking about unconditional love and eventually she will accept you for what you are. Good luck with it.