What not to do dealing with Gay Friends [Archive]

Sire

January 25th, 2011, 07:42 PM

First off, just because I am gay, this does -not- mean I'm your "Gay friend" we have names, stop saying "You should meet my gay friend *insert name here*" Why not call us your artistic friend, funny friend, good friend etc.?

No, I will not do your hair/nails just because I am gay.

No, I do not oogle every man in sight.
No, I do not want to have sex with every man I see.

"Ar you sure?" For the last time YES. Why would we have told you if we werent positive?

No, I will not put on make-up because I am gay.

No, I do not like Glee/Twilight etc. because i am gay, it is because -I- like it.

No, I do not automaticaly like any of the above due to being gay.

Feel free to add-on :D

Alexithymia

January 25th, 2011, 08:16 PM

No, I am not feminine.

No, I do not like clothes, fashion, etc because I'm gay. I like it because -I- like it.

No, I am not going to make a move on you.

No, I do not want to hang out with girls all the time.

Quick_Sylver

January 26th, 2011, 01:08 AM

nyQ4_KVDnoI

I think that says it all.

Fourth Dimension

January 26th, 2011, 02:15 AM

i dont not like britney spears cher miley madonna because im gay/bi its because i like because i do

willrod

January 26th, 2011, 08:46 PM

Here are some things about me:

* I am not into fashion, musicals, or makeup

* I don't use words like "fierce" and "fabulous" in my daily vocabulary

* My wardrobe looks- pretty ordinary i.e. I mostly wear T-Shirts

* I am not super skinny and obsessed with how I look

* I do like football and fast cars, almost as much as I like guys :)

* I am not obsessed with gay pop icons- I prefer listening to jazz and blues, and maybe some classical, though

* I hate going to the opera

* Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I automatically like every guy;

* I won't necessarily hit on you if you're straight, and

* Just because you happen to be gay too doesn't necessarily mean I want to date you- sorry. But..

* I do like making friends, of all genders and sexual orientations :)

That being said, do not ask me:

* "How do you know you're gay if you've never been with a girl?" Um, maybe because I see no need to? By the way, how do you know you're straight if you've never been with a guy?

* "So, like, are you the man or the woman in the relationship?" I'm pretty sure I'm a guy, and any guy that I date is also a guy, so I guess we're both the man in the relationship. That's how it works!

* "Aren't you afraid you're going to die of AIDS?" (I've been asked this one by some of my relatives) Yes, it's true that HIV and other STDs are on the rise, but they affect everyone. So everyone out there needs to be careful.

and one of my favorites

* "Which dress do you think I should wear to homecoming?" Um, well, whichever one you want. As long as it's not blatantly ugly, I could care less.

And on a final note- I am not your "gay friend"- I am simply your friend who happens to like guys :)

Vonn

January 26th, 2011, 08:54 PM

/too lazy to make a list

1) Acknowledge my lack of interest in girls, but other than that treat me as you would any other friend.

spw184

January 27th, 2011, 06:38 PM

Well all i can say is, when I tell girls im gay, they take it as a surprise.
Self-explanitory.

Sire

October 22nd, 2011, 06:06 PM

Resurrecting the Thread.

Syvelocin

October 22nd, 2011, 06:35 PM

Okay, sure then :P

-I do not hate guys because I'm a lesbian. There are many other reasons. And I also don't hate all guys. Just specific types of guys.
-I do not have penis envy.
-The reason I wear pants all the time is due to something completely different than my self-expression and sexual orientation.
-No, I will not have a threesome with you. I'm gay.
-My girlfriend and I are both girls. We are girls. There is no guy in the relationship. That's why it's a lesbian relationship. At least pick a different word for it. Honestly, in many relationships, there actually is what you seem to be getting at, but choosing to call it "the guy and the girl?" o.O It also varies a lot. For instance, if we choose to use the term "guy," it's definitely my girlfriend and not me who's "the guy" but she's very feminine as well. She's probably more feminine than I am. But I really do not like the term "guy" to describe this. As in, there isn't some sort of rule in lesbian relationships that states one partner must assume the role of the man.
-Just because there are a lot of stereotypes I coincidentally do follow, it doesn't mean I follow all of them. Okay, I'm vegetarian. I'm all organic, hippie, tree-hugger, shit. I love The L Word and I listen to Tegan & Sara. I moved in with my girlfriend right off the bat and I have a cat I treat like my son, who will most likely be the closest thing to a child I'll ever have. Sure. All that's true. It doesn't mean the rest of it is true... if anything is left... :P
-And also, though I don't want you paying too much attention to my sexuality, I find that some actually don't pay enough attention to it. Like they completely ignore it and treat me like I'm straight. Not that there's a different way to treat me, no, but it's really uncomfortable when they act like I like guys and I'm not into girls. That's why I'm slowing starting to hang out with more guys as time goes on. Because they understand that part of me at least. :P

LuckyLuke

October 22nd, 2011, 07:35 PM

I'm into fashion

I hate sports

Love to gossip (who doesn't?)

Lindsay Lohan is one of my dream BFFs and Madonna and I could Vogue it up (BTW, hit me up Gurrl)

I love the arts, music, opera, etc.

I use the word "delicious" as a verb, adjective, adverb, noun, and any other possible way.

And I'm straight as an arrow. Assumptions make an ass out of you and ..... nope, just you.

People need to accept that everyone is unique. :)

humanesquire

October 23rd, 2011, 12:39 AM

Yes, I am gay. Not because I was sexually abused as a kid, hurt by a girl, saw gay porn once, or whatever. I'm gay because I am attracted to guys and not to girls.

No, I don't find it ok for you to throw your repressed homosexuality onto me in the form of bullying.

No, black girls are not the only ones who understand me

No, I don't hate sports (Roll Tide!)

Yes, I can actually tell when a girl is pretty

redmann

October 23rd, 2011, 01:35 AM

Im Gay. Big whoop! Im the same old guy you have always known so treat me how you always have.
enough said

Emiil

October 23rd, 2011, 07:19 AM

best thread ever

logan fields

October 23rd, 2011, 11:31 AM

I agree with emil, this is the best thread ever and i have read a lot here at vt. I am fighting with maybe being gay because i am just so confused but part of that is because of what other people will think and say if i am and this thread made me feel so much better. the guy that made the first post (nick) is awesome and i very much agree with everything he said. thanks for this thread

Ender

October 23rd, 2011, 12:44 PM

Honestly, I like the gay guys that are just average guys. The sterotypical gays, I have no problem with it, but it seems they play it up a bit. To each his own though :)

Jimmy Page

October 23rd, 2011, 01:15 PM

My "list":
-No i don't like Cher because im gay,i like her because i like her
-No i don't whistle "Girls just wanna have fun" because im gay,i do it because that song is bloody glued to my mind
-I don't give a damn about fashion
-I don't like theater because im gay,i like it because...i just do
-I will not hit on you if your straight,no matter how cute you are
-And i will not hit on every gay/bi guy
-My dictionary is not filled with "fabulous" and "sparkly" words
-I don't stand like i do just because im gay,its because there's something wrong with my left foot
-I will not help you pick a outfit to a party because im gay,i will because im your friend and want to help you
-I don't like Glee because im gay,i like it because i think its a good and exciting show
-Artists and bands are not gay just because i like them
-I will not give you a makeover,or do you nails/hair
-I don't like using skin products because im gay,i like it because i really really hate dry skin
-And i don't hate dry skin because im gay,i do because i find it annoying
-And for the last time,i did not choose to be gay
-I'm not you gay friend,im your friend,and if you keep saying that i wont even be your friend
-And last but not least,im not gay because i like some things that is stereotype,im gay because i like to suck dick(sry,its my sarcasm and humor)
I actually had to make a "list" like this once,i was getting so bloody tired of people thinking the exact opposite of the things i wrote here,but that was partly because i answered stupid questions with irony and sarcasm:P

Kujiro

October 23rd, 2011, 02:58 PM

I am who I am , and accept me for who I am and not what I am.

Telling you I'm gay now, does not mean I wasn't gay before telling you.

You know that I'm gay because I chose to let you know, not because you are observant.

I'm gay does not mean every guy appeals to me, just like not every girl appeal to you if you are straight.

Being gay does not make me odd, it makes me honest to myself, and the one I love.

AppealToReason

October 23rd, 2011, 03:02 PM

How about...don't ask they why they are gay or what happened to make them gay.
Happens a lot here and it pisses me off...

Vonn

October 23rd, 2011, 03:11 PM

The only stereotypes that fit me are:
- my love of musicals
- I like having girl friends more than guy friends
- my slightly higher-than-average voice
- how weak I am compared to most guys

And that's it.

I met a girl last night and she got all excited 'cause she's never had a gay friend before. I did not immediately beat her to death with her own high heels; she's actually pretty cool.

Sire

October 23rd, 2011, 04:22 PM

Adding on to my "List" !

- No, NOBODY MADE ME GAY!!!!
- No, My parents did not teach me to be gay, in-fact I am in a strained relationship with them because of it. (Even though they do not know I am gay, but I just cannot bring myself to join in their conversations about how nice it is to be above all those "Fags")
- You have a gay friend? Cool story bro, you should tell some more people, because honestly I do not give a flying F***, and let -HIM- tell -ME-.

TrevorTime

October 23rd, 2011, 05:38 PM

Yupp, stereotypes just drive me up the wall.

I like watching sports and I play some sports.
I dress just like any average straight guy.
I burp, fart, and swear along with other "straight guy" mannerisms.
I have zero interest in operas, musicals, art galleries, and things like that.
Almost all of my friends are males.

And yet I am 100% gay, go figure. :)

kuuliluuk

October 23rd, 2011, 05:58 PM

I didn't choose to be a gay. I just am, have always been.
i wasn't happy when I realised I am gay, I wanted to be like everyone else. Instead I wanted to kill myself.
noone could tell I am gay unless I choose to tell that I am.
NO, I don't want to rape every male around, anally :D
Being Gay doesn't equal to anal sex.
No, I don't want to talk people into being gays (thats impossible!!!)
I wish I could be open about my preferences and nobody make big deal about that.

clr9823

October 23rd, 2011, 07:01 PM

I like guys. No, that doesn't mean that I like you, it means that I may fancy a guy in the same way that you don't fancy every female. If you know, then I trust you; please don't abuse that.

But above all, treat me as your usual friend. If we took the piss out of each other before I came out to you, then me being gay isn't above the things you can bring up. I have a sense of humour.

If its against your religion/ethics/culture etc.; great! I don't care. Unless I ask for your opinion about how I'm going to burn in hellfire for all eternity, or I directly come out to you, then don't mention it. You're wrong, I don't care, and forcing it on me will force me to say some very unflattering things about your opinions.

Oh, and if you want to talk about girls with me, then dont get annoyed if I mention a guy; while I fully respect that you don't feel the same way if you don't feel comfortable discussing it then I'm not really comfortable discussing your latest infatuation either.

AND just because I'm "now" gay doesn't mean I'm going to be any more flamboyant; I'll still be my dark, wry and drole self with a deep voice and a lack of body movement or hand gestures.

AND FINALLY, I need no more help or "advice" about that guy than you do that girl. I can handle gay dating myself kthxplz.

These may seem targeted at one individual, but actually I could say a lot of these about my different friends. Other stereotypes such as watching Glee don't bother me; it could well be related to me being gay, but it doesn't bother me what you attribute my likes and dislikes to.

Jupiter

October 23rd, 2011, 08:54 PM

I hate stereotypes. They suck. I'm not gay, but I am stereotyped as a nerd just cuz I have glasses. Forget haters!

nameless12

October 23rd, 2011, 11:47 PM

WOW!! O_O all the ones ive been reading are true!!, especially the one about liking twilight XD its always good to see people think similar, good post :D and honestly i cant think of other things to add for a list, theyv already been sayd.

Sire

October 27th, 2011, 07:27 PM

YES, I will laugh at gay jokes if they are funny!

Vonn

October 27th, 2011, 07:31 PM

No, I do not lust after each and every guy that crosses my field of vision. Just the hot ones.

brianpa

November 4th, 2011, 05:05 PM

YES, I will laugh at gay jokes if they are funny!

i like to fish and hunt
i dont like fashion, unless its camo
i like country
i hate the label gay friend, what if i was fat
and "how have you figured it out." well i havent...

jessehs

November 5th, 2011, 12:42 PM

I have a deep voice and I'm taller than average I'm fairly strong and I Play 3 contact sports I'm really bad at doing anything artistic I don't wear makeup or use skin or hair products I have no intrest in shopping, for anything. I hate he mall the twiglight movies make me sick I hang out with mostly guys and we spend time playing black ops and airsofting. I don't like britny spears or madona of anyone like them, and I'm bi. [email protected]!& stereotypes

TayTay

November 5th, 2011, 01:17 PM

AllThatYouDreamed

November 5th, 2011, 04:44 PM

I'm not gay because of sexual/other abuse (:rolleyes:)
Just because I like skirts and have long hair doesn't mean I'm "the girl". Srsly. We're both girls. TYVM
No, I won't kiss for you.

All I can think of thats appropriate. this thread seems to be aimed towards gay/bi guys though.

Sosaku

November 5th, 2011, 10:30 PM

I just have something to say. Do you guys really have a problem when someone says "you should meet my gay friend"? If you get offended by that than you have some serious self esteem issues that I urge you to get help with. He was being descriptive of you and that was the first thing he thought of you. There's nothing wrong with that.

I just had to say that. Carry on with the gay empowerment statements.

Yes, because if that is what people think we are...then why won't they tell their parents, i want you to meet my straight girlfriend, or my blonde girlfriend, or my football playing boyfriend? they don't they say just girlfriend or boyfriend, or just plain friend, but it seems that if you're gay, you're called a "gay friend" its stupid...

Abigballofdust

November 6th, 2011, 05:03 AM

No, I didn't chose to be gay.
No, I don't see every man out there like a potential ass to fill.
No, you won't make me straight.
No, I'm not wearing make up.
No, my elegance is not because of my sexual orientation, it's because YOU fail at dressing.
No, I'm not going to tell you if you're beautiful or cute or have any chance with any girl.
No, you won't contract homosexuality from me.

And last:

Yes, your homophobia is repressed homosexuality. We can be boyfriends if you want.

brianpa

November 6th, 2011, 09:01 AM

I just have something to say. Do you guys really have a problem when someone says "you should meet my gay friend"? If you get offended by that than you have some serious self esteem issues that I urge you to get help with. He was being descriptive of you and that was the first thing he thought of you. There's nothing wrong with that.

I just had to say that. Carry on with the gay empowerment statements.

i sooooooooooooo dont agree with that. what if i was fat? thats descriptive. or black? or asian? or stupid? or dying? how about introdcing me as your friend? who cares what i do? my op

Portable Desert

November 7th, 2011, 10:51 PM

"No thanks, im gay."
"No you arent."
"Need proof?"

kenoloor

November 9th, 2011, 12:04 AM

I just have something to say. Do you guys really have a problem when someone says "you should meet my gay friend"? If you get offended by that than you have some serious self esteem issues that I urge you to get help with. He was being descriptive of you and that was the first thing he thought of you. There's nothing wrong with that.

I just had to say that. Carry on with the gay empowerment statements.

So when a parent introduces their daughter and their gay son, that's okay? Note that they don't say "straight daughter," they just say "gay son."
Yes, it's a descriptor, but so is black, left-handed, blue-eyed, fat, hairy, sick, big-nosed, etc, and nobody uses those to describe people.
If someone introduces a couple of friends and then says, "this is Bradi, she's a lesbian" like...what? No. That's not okay.
I'm off of my soapbox now.

james wolf

November 10th, 2011, 04:29 PM

Yes, your homophobia is repressed homosexuality. We can be boyfriends if you want.

:D hehehehehe

littlegayboy

November 10th, 2011, 05:37 PM

i wish i had a guy my age

llamafarmer

November 11th, 2011, 09:01 PM

Um I'm ultra feminine, I go shopping with girls. I watch Glee, i love lady gaga, i love musicals, I like fashion.

oops.

kenoloor

November 13th, 2011, 11:29 AM

This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3j4t185wl-0).

TheDoctor

November 14th, 2011, 01:30 AM

Sire

December 29th, 2011, 03:49 AM

Resurrection! It's only a month old!

Thylacine

December 29th, 2011, 07:11 AM

For Jesús:

Yes Jesús she is pretty but I don't want to message her.

No Jesús I am not going to get AIDS.

In General:

No I am not your gay friend.

No I didn't make a speech about Lady Gaga cause I'm Gay. I made a speech about her because she is fierce and a great role model.

No I don't say fierce and fabulous all the time I was just leading you on.

Yes he is gay, no I don't want to bone him.

I don't like all men as most are lazy twats who smell like urine.

Yes my room is a brothel.

Yes I do only wear tshirts and shorts.

Yes I do want to be a musical theatre performer; but not because I'm gay.

My lisp is not because I'm gay.

I'm weak because I had the shit bullied out of me at elementary school

All these things are parts of WHO I AM!
NOT WHO I FUCK.

Maxxie

December 30th, 2011, 12:51 AM

Yeah, I'm gay. Don't like it? You can Fuck off.

Antagonist

December 30th, 2011, 01:02 AM

Just because i have more friends that are girls than guys doesnt make me gay. Dudes at my school are either butt holes or preps that act gay to get attention.

I might be Bi but-

That doesnt mean I like justin bieber pr Lady Gaga (even tho I do)

It doesnt mean I want attention.

It doesnt mean I wanna have sex with a guy and a girl at the same time.

It doesnt mean Ill bend over or pull my pants down for aanyone and everyone in the world.

Ah. Rant = done.

danny7

December 30th, 2011, 01:41 AM

i am still in the closet, and i say to my friends, yeah im in Drama 2 class and i fukin lovee Glee, but im not gay (im in the closet, not ready to admit it). The Gay Stereotype is reallyy annoying but i kinda got used to it alrdy

Spectrum

December 30th, 2011, 04:52 AM

No, I really don't want to have sex with every guy in the world just because I'm gay. You don't want to have sex with every girl because you're straight, do you?

photojared

June 28th, 2013, 12:36 PM

I love the reaction when a girl comes up to me and ask me to go out, oops sorry I'm gay
When ever I go with my mom to see her friends and meet their kids she always say here he is the ... one

MrDrDude

July 12th, 2013, 06:05 PM

Ah, y'all get tired of the gay stereotypes, y'all aren't an identical twin with his twin having a very high pitched voice and an unfriendly attitude, where people come to you because you are at least friendly to all people when you first meet them and let them get the chance to talk instead of YOUR brother who tells them to shut up and go away immediately, so you're always getting the questions: is your brother gay, why is his voice so high pitched and yours isn't, are you the older twin, AND THE MOST DREADED QUESTION OF ALL: ARE...YOU...TWO...TWINS? NO HE'S F*****G SPONGEBOB AND I'M PATRICK, YES WE'RE TWINS. And y'all don't have to deal with the gay twins stereotypes ie. Are you two gay and f*** each other every night? NO, my twin probably knows nothing about sex while I masturbate every night. All I need to find out now is that my twin is gay, then I'd never hear the end of it: I can see it now, Who has the bigger penis, who's top, who's bottom, etc.. Be happy that you aren't in my position: "is your brother gay? (Your reply: ) Not that I know of, but I am." I'm not gay, that would be YOUR response in my position. If you see this and are an identical and gay twin, let me know via pm, I'd like to hear the crap you get.