People's jokes about self harm.

[Kitty]

I hate it when people are like omg emos self harm for fun.
And all i can do is sit there and laugh as i can't run the risk of people picking up on my weird behavior on the issue.
When i'm with my friends it's like they have no idea!
If they knew the truth they wouldn't even joke about it.
A friend of mine just started Facebook chatting me about this girl who went my ballet who use to self harm...
and she was saying how she should give her scissors for her birthday to kill her self with.
It made me cry.
I wish more people would understand but not experience what true self harm is like :( <3
Sorry guys :| xxx

[Nevermore]

I completely understand your frustration. That is horrible what your friend said to your friend. Perhaps if you feel comfortable say it's not a joking matter and try to educate with reasons why. If people ask how you know, you could say that you were curious and looked it up. However that could lead to people thinking you self harm. People need to stop being so ignorant, I understand your hate and frustration. I've tried to educate people I know around me when they joke about it, what self harm is really about. Few know my story, I tend to keep it a secret.

[Charleigh]

I understand where you are coming from.

You just need to block out those comments that people make, they are only ignorant to self harming. I get it all the time, I get bullied for it, you just need to let it go over your head. Why let peoples ignorance hurt you, and get to you, pay no attention. They dont understand hun.

Im here id you wanna talk
:hug:

[Love.Hate]

Gosh thats horrible.
No wonder you cried, just dont listen to any of it.
They dont understand how much it hurts, and how mean it is.
:/
You could always just not laugh and tell them you dont find it funny laughing at others?
Unfortunatley most of us know all too well these jokes and snide comments, i just tend to brush them off.. but as most of my friends know i do it they dont tend to take the mick like they used too. X

[Fiction]

I know the feeling, I get it from my dad all the time. Unfortunatly people are always going to joke about things they don't understand, you have to realise it's not there fault. :/

[Kitty]

However that could lead to people thinking you self harm. People need to stop being so ignorant.

OMG I completely agree. It's so annoying. I mean people know about my eating and they've suspected me of SH but i point blank deny it all.
I wish i weren't so fricking emotional and could hold my self together.
I feel like i loose control all the time and get really angry or upset easily but never can realize it. :| ARGGGG!!!!!

Thank you guys <3 im glad i'm not the only one that's affected by this <3 xxxxxx

[UnknownError]

Yeh people seem to think SH is like, a hobby or something.
My friend said today "I seen Sean from primary yesterday and hes such a fucking emo bet he slits his wrists now and everything" and started laughing.
Im just like "Just cause he wearing a black t-shirt doesnt mean he cuts.."
Just try and ignore it. Its ignorance and they no nothing.

[Kitty]

I wish every one in the world could understand the same as us (partly) <3

[FullyAlive]

This has always really got to me too, every comment, every laugh, every look I keep in my mind. I end up upset and obsessing over it. Even though most of my friends know now, one of them still makes innapropriate jokes or statements she's really insensitive! Anyway unless you're prepared to tell them you're probably just going to have to learn to rise above it all and ignore it. Self harm is just a topic people wrongly think they know all about, in fact they are all usually incredibly ignorant and need to respect other people and not mock what they don't know. The only people with the right to use self harm as a joke are those who have lived through it, as I know I sometimes laugh and don't take it seriously but that's just because it's easier to laugh than cry :/
I hope you're ok xx

[Kitty]

Your so right Louise in soo many ways <3
I hope your ok too <3 xxxx

[REGRET]

I just try to block those comments out. Like others have said, people are so ignorant and will never fully understand.

Once we were watching a movie in school and this girl cut herself and people just started shouting "EMOKID!!" and things like that. I just wanted to punch them.

[Syvelocin]

You have friends that say that stuff hun?

Why do you hang out with them if they're going to say that stuff? They obviously wouldn't be able to accept you if they found out, and what kind of friend wouldn't accept you?

You have to find mature friends who aren't hateful like that, and accepting of things that are real and serious. There are always going to be kids like that, but you can choose which ones you surround yourself with.

[The Dudeh]

It's because they've not experienced it. You hear people saying things like "Aw pure emo sat in the corner slitting their wrists!" and I'm like - it's not at all like that. Just gotta ignore it, because they're blissfully ignorant.

[Bananaa]

Urrgh i know its awful some of the things people say i wish they'd just think sometimes how thier uneducated comments can hurt people. :/

[Weeping]

Once, before my family knew about my self-harm/depression/all that shit, I sat by the computer and my sister was in the same room. I was on some kind of test site and there was a 'test' like "what's your emo name?" I typed my sisters name and told her what it was. Then she said something like.. "I can't be emo, cause I'm not cutting up my arms". I didn't say anything more that day.

But just ignore them, and don't laugh at it. If they wonder why you don't, just tell them that you just don't find it funny. They're just a bunch of people who doesn't understand what depression etc. is.

[Kitty]

awhhh thanks guys.

But yeah mature friends....it's different when you're in high school...no one's mature. :|

and can't wait till i'm older and i can just move on from all this.. :|

And be friends with sensitive people.

All you guys are so helpful thank you <<3 xxxxxxxx

[ErykaInspire.]

The ignorance of people isn't really blame-worthy. Today's society, most teenagers are used to getting everything handed to them. Cars, Allowance, No curfews; they basically have no worries. For them to not know about and understand the struggles that others (us) partake in.. Well, I feel sorry for them. They'll never have as good of an outlook on life as the rest of us. They see things through a cardboard tube; nothing special, nothing changing, just cutting off their peripherals so they can't see what's going on around them. Whereas, we don't need to look through anything but our own eyes. We take in, we express, we understand. Granted, we may not like what we see, feel and witness, but at least we get that opportunity.
In my opinion, we live more than others. Life isn't a box of chocolates. It's like a maze of mousetraps that we have to walk through wearing a blind-fold. One wrong step, even the slightest one, could result in a pain nobody else would want to bare witness to.
They may laugh and joke about it, but they don't understand it. They don't see it the way we do. So instead of taking it to heart, think of how much we get that they don't.
Life wouldn't be better on the other side of the spectrum. I'm proud of being a cutter. It shows that I'm capable of getting through things on my own. Definitely not with the best solutions or anything, but it's far better than not experiencing life.

My friends joke about it all the time. Bringing up that they seen cuts on someones arm, making "emo" jokes and not thinking when they indirectly suggest for that person to kill themselves. I just got fed up about a month ago while my friends were saying disrespectful things about one of my good friends, who's one of the worst cutters that I know of. I said: "What if that was you? Do you even know what it's like to suffer? Put yourself in their shoes. Perhaps they have more on their plate that you do. Maybe his dad beats him and his mom does drugs. Maybe his brother committed suicide 3 months ago and was the only person he could talk to about things. Maybe it's people like you, that don't take into account just how much it fucking hurts. Before you start saying shit about people that you don't know a damn thing about, think of who you're saying it around- and think of who they're friends with".

They shut up immediately and gave me the kicked puppy look. I was too upset/angry to care.

Sometimes you have to fall from the mountain to realize what you are climbing for. Obstacles are placed in our way to see if what we want is really worth fighting for. From every wound, there's a scar, and every scar tells a story. A story that says "I was deeply wounded but I survived".

Don't bend your head. If people can't accept you for the real you, you don't need them. You have to surround yourself with people that understand you. Don't be ashamed of who you are. It's the only chance you get to live the way you want to.

[Kitty]

The ignorance of people isn't really blame-worthy. Today's society, most teenagers are used to getting everything handed to them. Cars, Allowance, No curfews; they basically have no worries. For them to not know about and understand the struggles that others (us) partake in.. Well, I feel sorry for them. They'll never have as good of an outlook on life as the rest of us. They see things through a cardboard tube; nothing special, nothing changing, just cutting off their peripherals so they can't see what's going on around them. Whereas, we don't need to look through anything but our own eyes. We take in, we express, we understand. Granted, we may not like what we see, feel and witness, but at least we get that opportunity.
In my opinion, we live more than others. Life isn't a box of chocolates. It's like a maze of mousetraps that we have to walk through wearing a blind-fold. One wrong step, even the slightest one, could result in a pain nobody else would want to bare witness to.
They may laugh and joke about it, but they don't understand it. They don't see it the way we do. So instead of taking it to heart, think of how much we get that they don't.
Life wouldn't be better on the other side of the spectrum. I'm proud of being a cutter. It shows that I'm capable of getting through things on my own. Definitely not with the best solutions or anything, but it's far better than not experiencing life.

My friends joke about it all the time. Bringing up that they seen cuts on someones arm, making "emo" jokes and not thinking when they indirectly suggest for that person to kill themselves. I just got fed up about a month ago while my friends were saying disrespectful things about one of my good friends, who's one of the worst cutters that I know of. I said: "What if that was you? Do you even know what it's like to suffer? Put yourself in their shoes. Perhaps they have more on their plate that you do. Maybe his dad beats him and his mom does drugs. Maybe his brother committed suicide 3 months ago and was the only person he could talk to about things. Maybe it's people like you, that don't take into account just how much it fucking hurts. Before you start saying shit about people that you don't know a damn thing about, think of who you're saying it around- and think of who they're friends with".

They shut up immediately and gave me the kicked puppy look. I was too upset/angry to care.

Sometimes you have to fall from the mountain to realize what you are climbing for. Obstacles are placed in our way to see if what we want is really worth fighting for. From every wound, there's a scar, and every scar tells a story. A story that says "I was deeply wounded but I survived".

Don't bend your head. If people can't accept you for the real you, you don't need them. You have to surround yourself with people that understand you. Don't be ashamed of who you are. It's the only chance you get to live the way you want to.

You can't believe how much this meant for me <3

It actually made me cry :'(

[HeroesAndCons]

Gaah i hate when ppl do that
my dad says in a sarcastic voice "oh im depressed im gonna vut myself"
it realy fucking hurts

my friends dont cause they know in sensitive on the issur cause i trust them so i told them

[ErykaInspire.]

You can't believe how much this meant for me <3

It actually made me cry :'(

D'aweee, hun. Don't cry. <3
Just, try to think about all of that whenever you hear judging slurs. Okay? (:

[Kitty]

D'aweee, hun. Don't cry. <3
Just, try to think about all of that whenever you hear judging slurs. Okay? (:

Yeah i will thank you babe <3 xxxxxx

[ErykaInspire.]

Yeah i will thank you babe <3 xxxxxx

You're welcome (: <3 x

[tombstone]

you should speak up for the things you believe in, when im around people who make distasteful jokes I speak up. I know its easier said than done, but if you speak up for what you believe in, not what effects you, people won't be able to accuse you.

hope your able to follow that :P

[gaypumpkins]

I honestly hate when people joke. I usually say, "Just fucking stop" and they just roll their eyes. I'm sure they know I cut, from my long sleeve shirts, my tenseness when we discuss self harm, etc. etc.
It's annoying and rude.

[Quahog]

There are going to be people who feel that way. They are just jerks, who just don't understand what you're going through.

[mynameisnotimportant]

The best thing you can do is try and ignore it..its difficult, its so fucking difficult but ive found when ive tried to talk to people about it in the past ive been labeld attention seeker and wanna be emo...maybe the people i know are just not that good but when you open yourself up to people you leave yourself vulnerable to ignorant comments and opinions...
now, i just talk to no one about it, ive tried to create a new image of myself as someone whos not easily upset and is constantly joking. I have to pretend or ill break down.
I think that issues with si should be talked about in lessons like pshe in school, maybe if people were more aware of what its actually like then they wouldnt mock so much

[Kitty]

The best thing you can do is try and ignore it..its difficult, its so fucking difficult but ive found when ive tried to talk to people about it in the past ive been labeld attention seeker and wanna be emo...maybe the people i know are just not that good but when you open yourself up to people you leave yourself vulnerable to ignorant comments and opinions...
now, i just talk to no one about it, ive tried to create a new image of myself as someone whos not easily upset and is constantly joking. I have to pretend or ill break down.
I think that issues with si should be talked about in lessons like pshe in school, maybe if people were more aware of what its actually like then they wouldnt mock so much

I completely agree. But i've found in PE and civics when they talk about eating disorders more attention on's me. And also it becomes more likely to be a subject of discussion. :'( :'(

I'd rather people just gain some respect about what they don't understand <3

[MadManWithaBox]

Well that's just people. They don't understand something they've never experienced, so they mock it and make it sound stupid. I'm not saying it's right of course, just peoples natural reaction.

[Charleigh]

People make alot of jokes because I dont think they realise how serious self harming is, and can me. Most of the time, they probly dont mean to hurt anybody but are only being ignorant. Just try and educate them about it, if they are decent people, they will realise its no laughing matter and look at it as a serious subject and not a catogory of humour.

[RAWWR]

People who don't understand really aren't work your time, actually no, people who aren't willing to learn aren't. Just remember how much stronger you are than them, and how stupid they are making themselves look.

[Kitty]

thank you people <3 xxxx

[ashleighhxbby]

It's funny, I blogged about this on here. People know not to joke with me about it. They don't know that I used to/currently participate in that. But I understand what you mean.
People are ignorant. It's very frustrating.

[AlphaDog0127]

I know what you mean, I have self harmed since the age of 9 (14 as I type this), it really annoys me how stupid some people can be, and how careless with their tongues! Those who don't know how great the emotional pain is to self harm always assume you are an "emo"...only recently did I seek help and admit I had a "problem"...but even then that was after years of self harm and a couple suicide attempts. All I got for doing that was more snide comments...but this time AIMED at me!

So I showed them this YouTube video...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKNlQ4N5QIg&feature=related

About self harm awareness, and since then, they have all been really supportive! But i'm not that type to just take hurtful remarks, I will defend anyone over such a delicate matter (eg self harm).

[MyRedHeadWorld]

Dont listen to them! I know how you feel, Ive done the same, and my friends dont understand :/ But I explained my situaction to the more understanding ones and now they dont joke about it, because they know more about self harm. they only joke about it because they dont know or understand it?! Maybe you should tell them you dont find it funny ¬¬ :)x

[Indecision]

Uh, I agree. When they do it as a kind of let down. However, I make jokes about myself doing it. But I've only told two people, and they have self harmed. I was at a sleepover and my friend was trying to cut up cake, she was struggling a bit so I said 'Let me do it, i'm pretty skilled with a knife, I practice whenever I get upset'. Sick? Yes. Hilarious? No.
But It makes those people you've told not forget that it's still in your head.

[Luves Everything x]

I get what you mean :) My friends are really hypocritical about it as well, they;ll be like 'just because your emo doesn't mean you cut yourself' one minute, then telling each other 'to go home and cut yourself, emo' the next. I only ever laugh to avoid attention, but everytime they say it it makes me feel like i'm doing something wrong :(

[whereismymind]

I hate it when people make jokes too but they expect a reaction out of it, to try and make people laugh. Its not something to joke about and agreed it's frustrating and annoying but whoever makes the jokes are just attention seeking. Ignore them your time isn't worth wasting on being bovered about it :)

[Immortal Love]

I agree, it's horrid, and makes me oh so very mad. I always hear people kidding and joking about Sucide, and I'll always butt in and say, "Hey, that's not funny to talk about." Or when this one girl was yelling at a old friend of mine in a meeting we had to have with her about her behaivor, the girl said " And Katie, your a freak because you freaking Cut yourself!!" This caused havoc on my end, and I snapped and yelled back at her, replying "You have no room to call her anything. You don't knwo what she may go through every single day.

[anonymous53]

I hate it too, my boss and such always makes jokes about cutters, I just have to stay silent because I have to work there for another year, and if they knew I was anything like that it would be a long year. People will never stop being ignorant of it... it's not funny, it hurts but I suppose it's best to ignore it.

[char0906]

i completely understand! i have to sit in lessons and listen to people saying things really mean about self harm, and i just want to fight its case.. but i know i can only do that to a certain point so they dont guess... or sometimes i cant say anything at all :/
i think people need to be made more aware of self harm and its effects... and how badly it effects people when people make jokes :/
much love <3

[Cynical]

People who make jokes about SH piss me off. When my friends started joking about it I made them aware of what SH actually is, and i'm glad I did because with that lesson I learned who my real friends where and who where not. I would always speak out and let them know what they jest at is not a joke and is a serious problem, if they take the time to listen and understand then that is one less joke being made, and if they call you an assortment of names and laugh at you then they aren't worth anyone's let alone your time.

[Roses_Are_Yellow]

I know how you feel. My "friend" use to make fun of Demi Lovato for cutting herself, and all I did was laugh at her. So, the next time she called her a phsychopath, I told her that wasn't cool. Coincidentally though, we were around other people, so she got mad and snotty saying" I always wanted to make herblook lie the bad person." And "I had agreed with her before" I told her though that it wash"t right of me to laugh at her for self harming.

...it took me a lot, to not scream" I know how she feels!" Right then and there

[A.J.]

I hate it when people are like omg emos self harm for fun.
And all i can do is sit there and laugh as i can't run the risk of people picking up on my weird behavior on the issue.
When i'm with my friends it's like they have no idea!
If they knew the truth they wouldn't even joke about it.
A friend of mine just started Facebook chatting me about this girl who went my ballet who use to self harm...
and she was saying how she should give her scissors for her birthday to kill her self with.
It made me cry.
I wish more people would understand but not experience what true self harm is like :( <3
Sorry guys :| xxx

"All emos cut, all jocks are homophobic closet cases, all quiet kids are crazy, all jewish people are bad at sports, all asians are uptight, all metalheads are satanists, all catholics are boy lovers, all black dudes have big cocks, all irish people are drunks..."
people are always going to believe what they hear when they dont understand stuff. Stereotypes are just part of life because there are ignorant people out there. Dontlet otheres judgement bother who you are

[TheSleepingInsomniac]

In health class i said abuse can drive people to self harm not just to abusing others or suicide my teacher said abuse doesnt make emos grrrrrrrrrr

[MyConfusion]

My friends do it all the time joking about it even when it was what true but then that's our way of trying to deny what we don't want to know. Two of my friends on my face book did a whole thing of me hating life and not wanting to live and cutting myself and then committing suicide. But yeah I still <3 them because without them where the hell would I be. But the misconceptions by the media and general public really get on my nerves. Well this looks like a big enough rant so bye :)

[Blujay]

Yesterday a friend of mine was joking about cutting her wrists for being lazy. I 'joked' back to send the razor my way when she was done, because I'm lazy, too. We went back and forth, and she mentioned suicide, and I said I'd hang myself or just cut really deep because it'd be relatively quick and easy.
She doesn't realize I'm being serious.

[bambino]

i was wearing a pair of distressed jeans, you know with the rips?
and my ex pulled at them and goes: not just your arms now is it, you been having a go at your clothes

and laughed. And I looked at him in shock, and then just sort of acceptance. Just 'Of course this is how I'm treated, why would i expect anything else'
blood was seeping through my sleeves because I'd cut 10 minutes ago, he saw it. I said: i know i need to stop, it stains everything
he laughed and said: do it in the shower then stupid


I trusted him with my biggest shame. And he laughed at me.

[derkderpderp]

ahha i know what you mean, its almost taunting, like theyre making a dig at me, at others who self harm, sometimes it almost feels like a freak show to me, like they say things like that to catch someone out so they can see the scars and taunt further, its sickening, ach.
try to ignore them? or just tell them how you feel about making sensitive jokes about people?eek

the last time it happened to me i nearly broke down, it was an ex who knew i used to self harm and thought id stopped, but i resumed it a few weeks after and we were in class and the teacher was trying to dissect a sheep heart in biology to show us how it works, only his scalpel wasnt very sharp, so my ex went and said " oh sir why not get habib to cut it, he knows how to cut through skin", that made me feel like i was winded, it sucked.

[bambino]

ahha i know what you mean, its almost taunting, like theyre making a dig at me, at others who self harm, sometimes it almost feels like a freak show to me, like they say things like that to catch someone out so they can see the scars and taunt further, its sickening, ach.
try to ignore them? or just tell them how you feel about making sensitive jokes about people?eek

the last time it happened to me i nearly broke down, it was an ex who knew i used to self harm and thought id stopped, but i resumed it a few weeks after and we were in class and the teacher was trying to dissect a sheep heart in biology to show us how it works, only his scalpel wasnt very sharp, so my ex went and said " oh sir why not get habib to cut it, he knows how to cut through skin", that made me feel like i was winded, it sucked.

ex's suck. especially when you've trusted them with something thats a sad, but inevitable, part of your life.
Gahhh darn them. teaches me for opening up! never again

[Carolyn]

i was wearing a pair of distressed jeans, you know with the rips?
and my ex pulled at them and goes: not just your arms now is it, you been having a go at your clothes

and laughed. And I looked at him in shock, and then just sort of acceptance. Just 'Of course this is how I'm treated, why would i expect anything else'
blood was seeping through my sleeves because I'd cut 10 minutes ago, he saw it. I said: i know i need to stop, it stains everything
he laughed and said: do it in the shower then stupid


I trusted him with my biggest shame. And he laughed at me.


What a jerk. Someone like him doesn't deserve someone who's so amazing, like you. He may have been awful about it, but think about this... Every one of us here supports you. Through the net we are able to get together and digitally hold hands. Here, you can trust us with your biggest shame, and be encouraged and uplifted instead of ridiculed and laughed at. That's what I love about EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU on these forums.

The fact that we can all come together and learn to accept and help eachother, even though it doesn't give us anything tangible in return is amazing. You all are the people that give me hope for a better tomorrow. You are the people who make me smile when I'm down. You are all absolutely fantastic human beings. We are human and imperfect, but together we can make up for eachothers flaws and come together to do something special.

<3 hugs to you all <3

[Magenta]

Please don't bump threads over two months old. :locked: