Being punished for a suicide attempt...

[Magenta]

I'm no longer allowed to go out and see the only friends who were close to keeping me alive for an indefinite amount of time. When I asked about plans I had made before my attempt that my dad had been promising me for months because he always got in the way of my making them before he turned around and said 'Well you had the police called to out driveway'.

The first thing he said driving me home from the hospital was that I should apologize to my stepmum for having police and an ambulance outside her house. I didn't call them! A friend did because I made the mistake of telling them how I was feeling! Is living while wanting to be dead not punishment enough?

He's holding it over my head. It wasn't my fault. I didn't do it just to embarrass my family. If I confront him about it, I will likely end up in hospital again because I plan to go to the knife block in the kitchen and start stabbing my arm just to prove a point. But I don't want to do that. I just want him to help me not constantly make me suffer and want to die even more. I'm not trying to get attention or be manipulative. I'm in pain!!!

Help me.

[FullyAlive]

I don't really know what to suggest but firstly how long ago was the attempt if it wasn't very long then maybe he is just having a hard time adjusting and handling this however I do agree you don't deserve this attitude in the slightest. Is there someone outside of the family that your dad would respect? A therapist or someone? Maybe if you told them how you were feeling then they could talk to your dad about it? If not could you try writing a letter or something?
Hope something changes soon, :)

[TheSleepingInsomniac]

I am so sorry he's not more understanding, big hug from me :hug2::hug::console::cuddle:. If you feel like you can't confront him without hurting yourself, try finding someone you really trust to talk to him for you if this is easier or write him a note and leave it just before school or something like that so he has to think before talking to you.
Best of luck.:cuddle:

[Magenta]

It was a week ago. I have spoken to my therapist who is talking to him on Monday but I'm just so desperate.

[Kaius]

This shouldn't be happening. After a suicide attempt no matter how serious or not you need your friends around you. Being alone is the worst possible thing. There is nothing you can do yourself at the moment but wait until the therapist has spoken to your father, it might help.

[FullyAlive]

A weeks really not that long ago especially for something as serious as this, its been three months since my mum found out I cut myself and she still has her moments when she says something innapropriate or won't let me do something. So give it time and please try not to hurt yourself, your dad won't understand and it will only make things worse.
At the moment I'd just wait it out until Monday when your therapist speaks to him, he could realize what he is doing and change his attitude. I know it will be hard but it's only two days. I hope you're ok :)

[Njathind]

Well personally I think what your dad is doing is wrong. He shouldn't be punishing you for your feelings and actions. You couldnt help being the way you were.However on the other hand maybe this is your dads way of coping with it all, maybe he thinks what he is doing is right. As has been said the best thing you can do is just wait for your therapist to speak to him on monday. Maybe he will realise what he's doing isn't right at all, its all completly wrong.

But please, please, pleas try and stay possitive. Dont ever try and kill yourself, its a horrible, painfull, scary experience. Being on deaths door for 4 days is no fun at all. Trust me I've been there.

Take care, please. :hug:

[georgiamay]

you shouldn't be punished for attempting suicide. You're dad should be supporting you, not punishing you. And keeping you from your friends is wrong as well, because when you're feeling depressed, friends are a great help a lot of the time.

But cut him a little slack. His daughter just tried to kill herself, how must he be feeling? I'm sure he doesn't have a clue what to do, and he probably thinks he's helping. I'm not saying you should let him punish you. So maybe sit him down and tell him that you think he's making things worse? But maybe do it in a way that couldn't be seen as confrontational, and he should listen.

Good luck. :)

[Magenta]

Was talking to him briefly... Then started to yell at him. I don't even care. I am screwed either way and I have nothing left to lose. He's taken away everything including my will to live. I told him I wanted to try again. He just looked at me with some smug look. I hate him. I wish he would just die.

Fuck you, Dad.

I know I should have been calm but nothing gets through to him. Nothing. If he won't die, I will. Don't know when but I can't take this anymore.

[LittleEpidemic]

I think, from your dads point of view here he's saying that cus he doesnt want to tell you how he really feels.
I think he's keeping you away from them because he wants to make sure youre safe, to make sure that he can check on you whenever

I know it might be hard for you to see it that way as you really want your friends but dont put up a fight for a while, for your dads sake
He doesnt want to lose his daughter <3

[Alexithymia]

I'm sorry. Your father sucks right now. Today's Monday, though, right? So have the therapist talk to him. Make him see that isolation = depression. More depression is not something you should have after a suicide attempt. While venting at him may not have been the smartest idea, it might have helped you. I know I'm not much help and I'm just re-iterating what everyone else said. Good luck. Try and not get too pissed off at him. :)