6 months...

[celine93]

Hi everyone, it's been a good few months since I've been on this site, mostly because I stopped needing it. I haven't cut in over 6 months, which of course I'm really happy about. I started talking more, I saw a counsellor, a doctor, a 'specialist', I told my mum, I completely conquered it... Or so I thought. I went for months without even thinking about it. I became happier- not completely, but a little happier. And this past 2/3 weeks has been hell.
I came out to my mum and told her I'm gay, I told her I have a girlfriend, who I'm completely in love with and have been going out with for almost 5 months now. And ever since everything's just been terrible. I'm starting to think about it more and more and I don't want to. I remember how it started and I'm starting to feel that way again. I read through all the journals that I wrote at the time and completely relate to what I was feeling then. I keep the razors in my room, hidden away. I can't help but think about doing it again and again... But at the same time I know I have to be string because 6 months is a long time- and I know if I mess this up just once and I give in, it will be so hard giving up again.
Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks, Kate x

[Njathind]

Awwww :hug:

I'm sorry you feel that way, is your mum accepting of the fact your gay? If not then maybe she needs time to accept it and you need hell of a lot of distraction techniques, 6 months is so so good, it would be a sahme to slip up now, wouldn't it?

You gotta stay strong, maybe start writing again? draw, use ice or an elastic band if you want to feel that rush so bad but if I'm honset I think you'd do better with one of the less physical options.

Were all rootin for ya to pull through, just remember its short term gain long term pain. If you wanna rant I'm open?

Stay strong hun.