Sexually Curious Band-Mate?

[Eagle63]

I'm in a 5-man band. Myself, our guitarist, singer, and bass player have all gotten around and had our shares of relationships. But with keyboardist, he flirts with us and the other guys (except for me) think he's gay and make fun of him for it. I try to stand up for him, but they just make fun of me too (even though I have a gf). He's quit the band and re-joined a few times because of this, and I just want them to shut up so we can focus on our music. What's the best way to go about doing this?

[tisdave]

The best way I can see is explaining the situation in a negative light to them. For example; explain how it affects the bonding between the whole band, especially when two of you are being put down. Explain to them how each of them are valued, and if one (or two) of the band members had quit, the band wouldn't be the same.

Good Luck!

[Cristiann123]

The average person doesn't think that much about gays, which is why they aren't. The fact that they are being haters toward a (possible) Homosexual guy, means that homosexuality is on their minds more than the average person.

meaning, they're kinda being gay in the process... Problem? I think so!

[Eagle63]

Never thoguht of it that way... Thanks!

[ccrunner]

have like a band meaning and threten the others with getting kicked off or whatever because its not right

[smitty35]

I think you should address all of the pple who make fun of him and tell them that this is affecting the music

[willrod]

You should explain to them that his sexual orientation is his business, not theirs. Why should they really worry about it- I mean, it's not like he's really openly coming onto them, is he? And tell them that it really doesn't make a difference if he is- that doesn't make him any less a good musician. If anything, there are plenty of famous gay musicians out there, like Elton John and Melissa Etheridge. Who someone is attracted to shouldn't completely define that person- we're all unique individuals.

[Orpheus]

Why hasn't anyone suggested talking to the keyboardist? If he's flirting, he is partially responsible for the situation. Let him know what's goin on. If he doesn't realize his actions are being taken as flirting, he'll want to know and adjust. If he really is flirting, tell him to cool it. His flirting is not wanted and it's breaking up the group. It's not a gay/str8 issue. What if a male keyboardist were constantly coming on to a female singer who has another boyfirend?