High School Relationships

[Iron Man]

Why is it that high school relationships don`t last? It seems like if you like someone and want to ask them out, it won`t mean anything because it is high school.

[ShutUpCasey]

Well, it's always worth the chance to be with someone you like. it donesn't have to last. Because nothing really lasts anyways. You just have to enjoy the relationship while it's around, y'know? and you never know, high school sweethearts get married. I mean.. half of them get divorced but hey. at least there was love at some point, right?

[Bath]

Because most people in high school;

- are too stressed
- are immature
- want to "experiment"
- want to date different people while they're young
- are incapable of strong feelings enough to want one person.

It's fine though. I mean I'm in high school so I notice this stuff. It doesn't matter, in high school you break hearts and get your heart broken. Part of life.

[Andrew0017]

I see exactly where you're coming from. Everyone always assumes that if you're a teenager in a relationship, it doesn't mean anything. It really pisses me off. People need to mind their own business and butt out of others' relationships. It might very well work out for them. You just don't know.
Take a risk and have a high school relationship. If it works out, great! If it doesn't, oh well...life goes on. Plenty of relationships that occur between people later in life don't work out either, but you don't see them getting attacked.
Take me and my girlfriend for example. We've been together for two years and are planning on staying together and getting married. We've already talked about everything, yet people have still given me a hard time about OUR decision, even though we've been together longer than most other highschool-age couples and are mature for both of our ages.
Sorry for the rant, but I feel very strongly about the subject you brought up. :rolleyes:

[DreamSeeker]

Because most people don't care about it in high school :/ They'll mainly just do it for the kicks and social status of being in a relationship. Most people in my school are like that, but sometimes it can be different.

[Zazu]

Because most people in high school;

- are too stressed
- are immature
- want to "experiment"
- want to date different people while they're young
- are incapable of strong feelings enough to want one person.

It's fine though. I mean I'm in high school so I notice this stuff. It doesn't matter, in high school you break hearts and get your heart broken. Part of life.

I agree with all of this.

Whilst I don't personally believe in strict monogamy, I feel that when people are young they are generally too young / not mature enough to fully understand love.

[The Dark Lord]

I see exactly where you're coming from. Everyone always assumes that if you're a teenager in a relationship, it doesn't mean anything. It really pisses me off. People need to mind their own business and butt out of others' relationships. It might very well work out for them. You just don't know.
Take a risk and have a high school relationship. If it works out, great! If it doesn't, oh well...life goes on. Plenty of relationships that occur between people later in life don't work out either, but you don't see them getting attacked.
Take me and my girlfriend for example. We've been together for two years and are planning on staying together and getting married. We've already talked about everything, yet people have still given me a hard time about OUR decision, even though we've been together longer than most other highschool-age couples and are mature for both of our ages.
Sorry for the rant, but I feel very strongly about the subject you brought up. :rolleyes:


You are too young to make decisions about marriage at 17. Just because you have been together for longer than average doesn't make you a better couple. For example if one marriage ends after 10 years but another one lasts 25 years, with the wife in the 25 year one being beaten the whole time, which relationship was better? It doesn't matter if your mature or not, you simply don't have enough life experience to make decisions about the rest rest of your lives. It's stupid, ill-advised decisions like getting married too young that result in people have kids too young, when they can't support them, what do you expect to be married but still be living at your parents house? At 17, your more likely to have a bed time than a plan for marriage and there is a reason for that. Most of the time, THEY DON'T FUCKING WORK. What other people have been saying about high school relationships is absolutely correct, people are too young, too immature and have more important things on their mind than to fuel some teenage romance. There is a sterotype that teens in love and stupid and that's because most of the time they are!

Also and in an unrelated point, what's the point in marriage? Surely nobody's relationship is so shallow that you require a metal ring and sheet of paper to prove you love each other?

/rant

[Fiction]

I think a lot of it is because when you are growing up, your personality is still developing and you therefore change a lot during this time. This means that two people who have compatible personalities at one point during high school most likley will not have compatible personalities later in life.

[Jenna.]

deleted

[Andrew0017]

You are too young to make decisions about marriage at 17. Just because you have been together for longer than average doesn't make you a better couple. For example if one marriage ends after 10 years but another one lasts 25 years, with the wife in the 25 year one being beaten the whole time, which relationship was better? It doesn't matter if your mature or not, you simply don't have enough life experience to make decisions about the rest rest of your lives. It's stupid, ill-advised decisions like getting married too young that result in people have kids too young, when they can't support them, what do you expect to be married but still be living at your parents house? At 17, your more likely to have a bed time than a plan for marriage and there is a reason for that. Most of the time, THEY DON'T FUCKING WORK. What other people have been saying about high school relationships is absolutely correct, people are too young, too immature and have more important things on their mind than to fuel some teenage romance. There is a sterotype that teens in love and stupid and that's because most of the time they are!

Also and in an unrelated point, what's the point in marriage? Surely nobody's relationship is so shallow that you require a metal ring and sheet of paper to prove you love each other?

/rant

All I'm going to say in response to this (since this isn't in ROTW and I really don't feel like getting into some major debate over something so insignificant...) is that it's my relationship and my relationship only. What I decide to do regarding marriage isn't anyone's business on an online forum, and I shouldn't be expected to sit around explaining every last decision I make.
Just to clarify, we aren't getting married right now. We aren't even engaged yet. We've simply talked about it occurring in the future. Not this "living at home while married" crap, but I had a good laugh reading that, I have to admit.
And I think with marriage many people want a "step up" from just being boyfriend and girlfriend...I could be wrong....
Also, I'm not 17. My girlfriend is, not that it matters, but I'm just saying.

[Jess]

that is true, though sometimes it does work out

[Sage]

All I'm going to say in response to this is that it's my relationship and my relationship only.

Exactly, and so you do not speak for anyone. People believe teenage relationships generally don't last because they generally don't. You're in the minority.

[The Dark Lord]

All I'm going to say in response to this (since this isn't in ROTW and I really don't feel like getting into some major debate over something so insignificant...) is that it's my relationship and my relationship only.


I don't understand what you consider to be so insignificant? You relationship (I suspose it's only a teenage romance so in all probability it'll end), your opinion (If that's the case why bother posting in the first place?) or my opinion (Now that'd just be rude).

What I decide to do regarding marriage isn't anyone's business on an online forum, and I shouldn't be expected to sit around explaining every last decision I make.


You say your marriage isn't anyone's business, so why tell us in the first place, the thread wasn't about marriage? I'm asking you every decision of your life, it's just that marriage seems to be quite a big deal to you.

Just to clarify, we aren't getting married right now. We aren't even engaged yet. We've simply talked about it occurring in the future. Not this "living at home while married" crap, but I had a good laugh reading that, I have to admit.


I'm glad I made you laugh, it must be nice to be laughing for a change, rather than being laughed at.

And I think with marriage many people want a "step up" from just being boyfriend and girlfriend...I could be wrong....


Yeah you are.
----------------------------

BTW I wasn't specifically talking about you. It's just that I think people who plan on getting married with so little life experience and tell everyone else how mature they are, are the ones who are actually very immature and insecure. If you need a sheet of paper and a ring to prove your love for each other, then your relationship is in serious danger.

Before this turns too nasty, the reason why relationships don't last in High School are because horny teens mistake sex for love

[Mrs.KermitTheFrogx]

not really
my brother and his girlfriend (who are currently 21 know)
have been dating since they were 14 they went to the prom togther and went to university near eachother ...
so you cant tell me that doesnt mean anything ?
i think some people can last years through school its just alot of the time peer pressure and stuffgets to peoplex

[Andrew0017]

I don't understand what you consider to be so insignificant? You relationship (I suspose it's only a teenage romance so in all probability it'll end), your opinion (If that's the case why bother posting in the first place?) or my opinion (Now that'd just be rude).




You say your marriage isn't anyone's business, so why tell us in the first place, the thread wasn't about marriage? I'm asking you every decision of your life, it's just that marriage seems to be quite a big deal to you.




I'm glad I made you laugh, it must be nice to be laughing for a change, rather than being laughed at.



Yeah you are.
----------------------------

BTW I wasn't specifically talking about you. It's just that I think people who plan on getting married with so little life experience and tell everyone else how mature they are, are the ones who are actually very immature and insecure. If you need a sheet of paper and a ring to prove your love for each other, then your relationship is in serious danger.

Before this turns too nasty, the reason why relationships don't last in High School are because horny teens mistake sex for love

I don't really care if I did get "laughed at" before. Oooh, getting laughed at by a bunch of kids sitting on the internet, that upsets me so much. :rolleyes:
Fair enough, I will admit that a majority of teenage relationships don't work out, because of sex and drama and whatnot. However, some do and you can't sit here and tell me that that's not true.
My parents are a perfect example. They met in highschool, got married after college, and have been together ever since. Yes, it's not common. But it can still happen.
What I meant by not having to explain every decision I make is merely the fact that I posted my opinion and my experience with highschool relationships. I didn't feel like going into an entire debate on whether or not my relationship will last or why marriage is good/bad, etc.

[Sage]

I don't really care if I did get "laughed at" before. Oooh, getting laughed at by a bunch of kids sitting on the internet, that upsets me so much. :rolleyes:
Fair enough, I will admit that a majority of teenage relationships don't work out, because of sex and drama and whatnot. However, some do and you can't sit here and tell me that that's not true.
My parents are a perfect example. They met in highschool, got married after college, and have been together ever since. Yes, it's not common. But it can still happen.
What I meant by not having to explain every decision I make is merely the fact that I posted my opinion and my experience with highschool relationships. I didn't feel like going into an entire debate on whether or not my relationship will last or why marriage is good/bad, etc.

Getting so defensive over something this trivial does little credit to your supposed maturity, Andrew.

[Andrew0017]

Getting so defensive over something this trivial does little credit to your supposed maturity, Andrew.

I'm not getting defensive...it's called explaining myself.
Off topic much?

[Jenna.]

I think it just depends on the couple. (: Some work out, some don't...like anything else in life.

[Sage]

I'm not getting defensive...

Yes you are. Simply because everyone on one side of this debate supposedly know a couple that has been together since they were teenagers does not rule out the truth behind the stereotype. Teenage relationships more often do not last, and for every couple you know that did last, there are many, many more that did not. That's all it is.

Don't take things so personally. When people say you and your girlfriend will probably not last, they are justified in saying that because it is statistically true. It doesn't matter how well or how poorly they know you- because if we're in the game of using individual cases to justify generalizations, I'll tell you about a couple I knew that were together since they were 10 years old, and just broke up a month or two ago, one of them being 18 and the other 17. No matter how well you think things are going, anything can happen, and anything will happen.

Now swallow your pride and stop complaining. You are well above this.

[Andrew0017]

Yes you are. Simply because everyone on one side of this debate supposedly know a couple that has been together since they were teenagers does not rule out the truth behind the stereotype. Teenage relationships more often do not last, and for every couple you know that did last, there are many, many more that did not. That's all it is.

Don't take things so personally. When people say you and your girlfriend will probably not last, they are justified in saying that because it is statistically true. It doesn't matter how well or how poorly they know you- because if we're in the game of using individual cases to justify generalizations, I'll tell you about a couple I knew that were together since they were 10 years old, and just broke up a month or two ago, one of them being 18 and the other 17. No matter how well you think things are going, anything can happen, and anything will happen.

Now swallow your pride and stop complaining. You are well above this.

You have a very good point.
I didn't mean to get so worked up, but when people try to act like they know everything about my relationship (at least it seemed that way to me), it pisses me off. And when I'm angry, I'm not the nicest person to deal with.
But back on topic, I see why people think that highschool relationships don't work, because in many cases, they don't.
But I think a lot has to do with the dynamics of each individual relationship and it all comes down to if the two people in the relationship are able to settle problems and work together, as well as many other things.

[Ihaveleftforever]

because usally HS age kids have "crushes" so they may think there in love and what not but really just a crush

[SuperSuraj]

because usally HS age kids have "crushes" so they may think there in love and what not but really just a crush

I couldnt agree more, i've honestly have a a bunch of crushes, but i new it would never be more than that. I'm a junior now so that phase is stopping but HS relationships are a;most pointless to me. All that happens is you like the person for a while, maybe a few months if your lucky a few years, then you break up everyones heartbroken and you move on.

I hate to be this cynical but its sadly true.

[Syvelocin]

I don't like that they're generalized either. So then we have to live with the stereotype other teenagers have created. I always dated with a long-term relationship in mind. I've always dated for love o.O Not some cutsey relationship to brag about and show off in the hallways, then you break up two weeks later. I had one relationship I had to hide from everyone even, because she was a girl and I wasn't quite ready to come out to my entire school...

I'm also not new to love, which is one thing most teenagers are. Getting through a couple extensive relationships, I've come to have a better idea than most kids on when it's love and when it's not. So what I hate is when I get these dirty looks for the engagement ring I wear and the constant "Probably got knocked up, huh?" >.<

I'd like to give evidence to support it though. But I'm not getting married to my high school sweetheart :P He's a couple years older, didn't go to school with him.

I'd like to also back up the length of relationships as well. But my mum got engaged after six months of knowing my step dad :P Going on ten years of being together however. In the long run, knowing my fiancé since 2007 doesn't mean much. But the fact that it's just like it was at the beginning gives me confidence.