Grandma issues?

[Kaius]

Urgh, this is just a rant really but tbh I feel like i need some sorta push in the right direction.

Basically, my grandmother is coming to spend Christmas with us. Any other year I'd be absolutely thrilled, I love my grandma to pieces but in the last 6-9 months shes just been unbearable to be around. Shes always been an animal lover, i suppose thats where my dad gets it from and in turn, where i get it from. But lately its become more than just giving the animals in the house affection, its basically like shes having fully fledged conversations with them. The worst part about it is every time she does it it sets off my most excitable dog whos known to get too carried away, jump up at and nip people. Not only that shes making us all uneasy whenever shes here with us because of the things she does. Its like we're not even here, she won't talk to us or anything its either the animals or silence. We've asked her to stop several times because the more she antagonisies the dog the more boisterous he gets and we're trying to curb that habit. She carries her handbag around constantly, even into the bathroom with her and clutches it tighter to her when one of us walks past, its like she expects us to steal from her. Shes even accused my father of it and he's the most loyal person i know! She refuses to go to the doctor for a check up and we can't do it for her, she forgets the days and shes continually turning up at our house out of the blue for absolutely no reason whatsoever. We're unsure whether shes doing it on purpose because she never does it around other people its just with us, or whether theres something seriously wrong for example our main concern is Alzheimers as its genetic in my dads side of the family. Its starting to get me down quite badly and its gotten to the stage i just stay in my room whenever shes around because it quite frankly worries me to the stage of illness. I don't want to spend Christmas just dodging my family because i can't cope with it but tbh i'm out of ideas. My temper isn't the best part about me and its getting harder to hide how frustrated im getting with it. I know hopefully its not her fault but its just so hard to sit there and watch/listen to. Not only is it affecting me but its also putting a huge strain on my parents and at this time of year they don't need it on top of other family matters.

[nick]

Its very difficult to cope with elderly relatives if they start showing signs of confusion, and knowing a little about the trouble you've had with Merlin I can well understand why you dont want any set backs on that front.

Not sure that I can offer much practical advice, keeping out of the way as much as possible seems a reasonable plan, as does taking Merlin for lots of walks, doubt if he'd mind.

[IAMWILL]

:(

Well, I dont know what more to offer besides stay strong, I understand it's a tough time for you put you can push through it. Just keep your mind off it, and it'll be over before you know it.

[Kaius]

Thanks for the replies guys.

Well, it just got a lot worse. My grandmother has just out rightly accused my father of stealing from her flat, or that he's paid someone to do it for him. Then when it came to the fact shes ruining Christmas for us she told my parents because i'm not blood related to her she doesn't give a fuck whether i care about her or not. So, well. Thanks Gran. :/

[The Joker]

That's not her talking, Aaron, that's the Alzheimers.

[Kaius]

Thanks Matt :)
Yeah, it looks like it was. Today has been like it never happened, it doesn't look like she remembers either. Dad is going to phone her Doctor when they open again and get her submitted for one of those tests.

[nick]

:( its a horrible thing

[CaptainObvious]

Alzheimers is tough, pretty much all of my grandparents who have died so far have been as a result of that. As frustrating as it is, it's no longer really them speaking, so don't take it too personally. It's harder to do that when the dementia leads them to be outright nasty, but it's just the same thing as when they're forgetful.

[Zazu]

That's not her talking, Aaron, that's the Alzheimers.

This.

The sad thing with old age, and the things that come with it, is that it's inevitable. There's nothing you or anyone else can do about it, you just have to sit there and put up with what it does to people.

Along the line of what Matt said, you always have to remember that it's not really her being how she is, it's the neurological condition that she or no one else can help. However cliched it sounds, you just have to remember the good times you've had with her and remember her for who she is, not the person she's presenting as at times now.