Giving up

[BreatheHopeIntoMe]

I'm not going to try and pretend that I'm getting better anymore. I've come to realize that if I was, I wouldn't be constantly counting calories, feeling immense guilt and self-hate for every little thing that enters my mouth.

I'm going back on a 270-500 cal diet and probably the ABC diet after winter break.
Thank you for the support you guys provided when I was trying though. Particularly Syvelocin and Fiction. You guys are the best.

I'm going to continue using the site for other things, and I'll offer my support to others in the ED forum. So I'm not quite dead yet. =)

[Syvelocin]

I know it's hard hun. I do. I'm a size larger in clothes now, and I just wanted to quit altogether. You can get better. I still would rather skip my meals, but I'm still making myself eat because I know there's only one other option than recovering, and that's dying like this. I want to get to the point where I can look at myself in the mirror and be truly confident in who I am, which isn't going to happen by starving myself. It'll just make me more insecure.

I wish you the best though. I'm glad I could help at all, it means a lot to me :)

[Fiction]

What will starving really achieve? Being skinnier won't make you happier, it'll only make you want to be skinnier and skinnier.
You need help Kyla. The only way you'll be happy is if you get better.