what do i have? if anything

[Jacob H.]

i am not the toughest or biggest person. so throughtout my life i have been picked on. also i am sort of a third leg in any type of group i'm in, and dont have alot of freinds. i keep to myself. and i believe i have a little case of depression. but thats not what im asking about.

you see because of the above listed things, mostly being an outcast, and being picked on. i have found enjoyment and pleasure upon huring the yelps, or screams of pain when i hurt someone. i find this disturbing but cant help it. so any ideas on what that could be

also i might have ocd.

i make sure appliances are shut off many times, i chew my food on one side of my mouth then the other. i repetively tapp my right hand twice, then left hand once, superstitious beliefs effect my life some what.

so what do i have, and is this a serious problem

[Syvelocin]

Before I start, we cannot diagnose you. The only way you can for-sure know if you have anything is by seeing a professional.

Those are symptoms of OCD, and you may have OCD. You'll have to see someone about it to get diagnosed, but those are some symptoms.

you see because of the above listed things, mostly being an outcast, and being picked on. i have found enjoyment and pleasure upon huring the yelps, or screams of pain when i hurt someone. i find this disturbing but cant help it. so any ideas on what that could be


If there is something amiss, in your case it would be something called sadism, which when we're talking about psychotherapy can be either looked at as a mental illness or a counter-productive coping mechanism. It simply means you receive joy or pleasure at the pain and suffering of others. Not to be confused with masochism, which is pleasure at receiving the pain instead of causing it to another person. It can either be emotional or physical pain. I'm personally pretty sure I have the psychiatric masochism, but I've never spoken to my therapist about it.

Sadistic personality disorder used to be a disorder of its own, but would now be a personality disorder not otherwise specified as it hasn't been included in more recent DSMs.

You should go in and talk to someone though, to make sure.

[Writer]

Jacob H.

Hmm you remind me of the Jacob H. from Boy Scouts, strange he acts like I did when I went to school for the first time.

Not many of the people in the troop know I went to school.

It was odd, on one of the trips he opened up to me about how he was depressed. I don't think he knows but I listened to him.

You sound just like him, you're fine, and if not, you will be.