suicidal?

[Bath]

So I've never really been suicidal before, ya know? Just wanted to hurt myself, and sometimes I would think about what's the point of living, but I never wanted to kill myself.

Earlier today, I got really pissed, depressed, upset, and downright horrible...thinking about things, a thought came across me.. how EASY would it be, to just take a knife from my kitchen, go take a shower and just.. slice a vein? Or find my dad's gun and just put it to my head and be dead before I even realized I pulled the trigger? I would feel better, well, I wouldn't feel at all.. and all this bullshit in life would just be gone. everything would be gone. The thought of it gave me pleasure until I snapped back. I was thinking about killing myself.

that fact scared the hell out of me.

what should I do? I don't want to think about that again but in my little fits that type of stuff comes to my mind usually.

[nick]

I think like that regularly, we dont have guns here so that option isnt available to me. But the feeling that enough is enough and just wanting it to be over is very familiar to me. I've had that thought most of today, and of course I think about how I could do it.

I hope you will continue to fight, the fact that we are both still here shows that however bad we are feeling part of us doesnt want to give in. We only get one shot at life, even when things are bad we have an instinct to cling on and make the most of it.

Message me if youd like to talk.

[Fiction]

I can remember the first time I had suicidal thoughts... and how scared I was. Although your thinking like this when it comes to it, it's much harder. I tried to commit suicide twice.. Or i thought i did but deep down i knew that the amount of pills I was taking was not enough, and the second time i made myself throw all the pills back up.
Try not to let them scare you, because chances are deep down you know your life is worth living. If not then i suggest you get help.

[Brittany123]

I know how scarey it can be when you first have those thoughts. If the thoughts get really bad you may want to get a therapist or counseller. If you don't you could get worse, I have attempted suicide so I know how bad it can be. Just remember that you will always have a reason to live, things will get better. Therapy can also reveal that you may have depression and be able to get medication. If you ever get medication STAY on them it'll make things worse being off them (my friend doesn't take her meds and was just diagnosed with Borderline depresion) also talking to people sometimes helps

[Mike321]

Its is quite scary the first time you have suicidal thoughts, I've been getting them quite alot recently, I know what you mean when you think about how easy it would be.
But the fact that you snapped out of it, means that deep down you dont want to do it and you have a reason to live, we all have.
Try not to let the thoughts scare you too much, if you have them again.
We only get one life, its really not worth throwing that chance away.
Hope this helps

[Zazu]

Its is quite scary the first time you have suicidal thoughts, I've been getting them quite alot recently, I know what you mean when you think about how easy it would be.
But the fact that you snapped out of it, means that deep down you dont want to do it and you have a reason to live, we all have.
Try not to let the thoughts scare you too much, if you have them again.
We only get one life, its really not worth throwing that chance away.
Hope this helps

I think this post bears very good advice.

I went through a period of having heavy suicidal thoughts which ended in two suicide attempts. It's fucking scary and you feel like you have no control over yourself and your body. Like the above poster said though, you snapped out of it. You got into a bad state but still had some logic and clear thought left in your mind. IF you ever get like it again, remember that moment of clarity. Remember how stupid what you're doing is and remember that you can easily snap out of it once more.

[notactive]

As long as you have that little voice in the back of your head saying "you don't really want to do this" then you should be fine but it still doesn't change the fact that you have these thoughts and how scary it is in the moment.

Whenever I get like this I think of the one person in my life that is worth living for. It would be so easy for me to just not be here anymore but it would affect him so badly. He is the reason I live for. Find your reason and hold on to it with all your heart. If you have more than one reason even better. The more reasons you have to stay alive the less likely you are to actually attempt/commit suicide. Please stay strong and there is always people on VT to talk to when you feel like this to help you through ! xx

[Preacher]

1 week ago, a friend of me commited suicide, she couldn't handle the stress of the upcoming exams -__- really sad, .. you think it'll never get close to you and then you hear your friend did it. suicide is never the solution for your problems! It always get's better