Someone please help. Idk whats goin on

[Necroxfiendx07]

Me and y girlfriend dated for a year and 6 months. She broke up with me november 2nd, saying i didnt accept her for who she is, and says i got a little controlling sometimes. But said she still loved me. November 7th we got back together, hours later i pushed quitting cigarettes on her like a dumbass and she broke up with me again saying i proved i could never change. We didnt talk for a few days, then out of no where we started talking again. She came over the next wednesday and we got intimate and everything felt normal. Everything was the same, only i wasnt a "boyfriend" and she wasnt my "girlfriend". I asked her once more to take me back and she cried and said she didnt wanna be in a relationship right now, i guess because of the stress. Anyways, since then we talked everynight and talked AS IF we were dating. Saying baby, and i love you, etc. Saturday night she got sick, i called to make sure she was ok and she told me to leave her alone. So i sent her a huge text about how i proved myself tp her and couldnt take it anymore, i said to give me a call if she wants me in her life. Since then (over a week ago), she has ignored everything ive sent her. Everything. Idk what happened. Thigs were going so well again. If i leave her alone for a while, is there a chance she will contact me? I lover her more than anything, i just couldt imagine how she could change overnight like that.

[Lasky]

Me and y girlfriend dated for a year and 6 months. She broke up with me november 2nd, saying i didnt accept her for who she is, and says i got a little controlling sometimes. But said she still loved me. November 7th we got back together, hours later i pushed quitting cigarettes on her like a dumbass and she broke up with me again saying i proved i could never change. We didnt talk for a few days, then out of no where we started talking again. She came over the next wednesday and we got intimate and everything felt normal. Everything was the same, only i wasnt a "boyfriend" and she wasnt my "girlfriend". I asked her once more to take me back and she cried and said she didnt wanna be in a relationship right now, i guess because of the stress. Anyways, since then we talked everynight and talked AS IF we were dating. Saying baby, and i love you, etc. Saturday night she got sick, i called to make sure she was ok and she told me to leave her alone. So i sent her a huge text about how i proved myself tp her and couldnt take it anymore, i said to give me a call if she wants me in her life. Since then (over a week ago), she has ignored everything ive sent her. Everything. Idk what happened. Thigs were going so well again. If i leave her alone for a while, is there a chance she will contact me? I lover her more than anything, i just couldt imagine how she could change overnight like that.

There is a chance she'll contact you, a BIG chance. Just let her be, let her figure things out. And remember, if it wasn't meant to be, don't force it. Good luck man

[Fact]

There is a chance she'll contact you, a BIG chance. Just let her be, let her figure things out. And remember, if it wasn't meant to be, don't force it. Good luck man

This kind of.

Pushing your attention on her when it's clearly not wanted isn't going to help. If she's ill, then give her time to recover and get a clear head.

[AllThatIsLeft]

women need space, a lotttt of it. believe it or not... making her change certain stuff was a huge mistake, one she wont forget and one she will bring up every so often. the key to that is, advice... not force. She is her own person, and if you can't accept that then she was right to not want to be with you.

But don't give up yet, give her a little time.. if after a while she still doesn't come back, contact her again, not with the intentions of getting back together but to just have her in your life. if things go as they should, and you don't press the matter too much things should go back to normal within a couple months... or sooner, it all depends how willing she is.
Keep in mind that she may not want you back at all, and that it is better to expect nothing, than expect it all. It will surprise you if she wants you back, and it won't hurt as much if she doesn't.

Best of luck. =]

[Necroxfiendx07]

Thanks everyone! Really good advice youve given me. Hopefully in time she will miss me and look past my mistakes, as ive done for her before. I will keep a positive head, but wont get my hopes up as for all i know she could be moved on already. Thanks again!

[Necroxfiendx07]

Anyone else have any tips or suggestions? How long should i wait for her to contact me? From what i hear a month or two is a good amount of time before i should contact her if she doesnt contact me. So far ive been ignored for a week and a half.

[Rutherford The Brave]

I'm going to tell you something and by no means, do I wish you to take the wrong way. However, I think you need to move on. You might hate me for saying it, but shit's obviously not working between you. Why put yourself on the fast track to issues and a lot of dissapointment. I've seen it too many times, but I digress. It is your decision of course, should you so choose either way its not going to hurt me.

[Necroxfiendx07]

I'm going to tell you something and by no means, do I wish you to take the wrong way. However, I think you need to move on. You might hate me for saying it, but shit's obviously not working between you. Why put yourself on the fast track to issues and a lot of dissapointment. I've seen it too many times, but I digress. It is your decision of course, should you so choose either way its not going to hurt me.

Meh, i disagree. I dont see it as "shits not working", it just seems she needs some time to herself. Before i jump to conclusions, ill give her her time.

[Rutherford The Brave]

Meh, i disagree. I dont see it as "shits not working", it just seems she needs some time to herself. Before i jump to conclusions, ill give her her time.

I hope for your sake thats the case, but usually when they start acting like this, its too late.

[Necroxfiendx07]

I hope for your sake thats the case, but usually when they start acting like this, its too late.

Who knows, from people ive spoken to i see this isnt an uncommon thing, and many times the girl does come back if shes left alone and given time to miss the person. Only time will tell

[Necroxfiendx07]

Any other suggestions? Im thinking i should give her a month and if she doesnt contact me i should contact her. But how good are my chances? Before she started ignoring, but after we broke up, she came over and we cried and confessed our love to eachother and had sex multiple times. She said she still loved me too, and that ill alwaya be the only one for her. But then a few weeks later, like i said, out of nowhere she starts ignoring me. Ugh

[Sage]

Any other suggestions? Im thinking i should give her a month and if she doesnt contact me i should contact her.

With all due respect, Anthony, if she doesn't contact you in a month, I don't think you should contact her again. This is not healthy for either of you.

[Necroxfiendx07]

With all due respect, Anthony, if she doesn't contact you in a month, I don't think you should contact her again. This is not healthy for either of you.

This is terribly unhealthy. Even though i messed up my second chance, if shea being honest, if she took me back she'd have nothing to worry about cause i wont take for granted what i have anymore. If after a month i hear nothing, ill contact her JUST to have her in my life and grow from there. If i still get ignored, then ill have to move on. : /

[Rutherford The Brave]

Dude, I hate to say it but this is kind of typical. She'll come back, I know what I did. Yet, how come you didn't know then, why does it have to be the third chance?

[Necroxfiendx07]

Dude, I hate to say it but this is kind of typical. She'll come back, I know what I did. Yet, how come you didn't know then, why does it have to be the third chance?

I didnt know then because i was all caught up and needy and insecure, so i thought i was acting ok, when in reality i was the one who was doing things wrong. I thought i was doing the right thing, when now i realize i was just coming off controlling to her. I just need her to talk to me and at least just be friendly and civil to me.

[Sage]

If after a month i hear nothing, ill contact her JUST to have her in my life and grow from there. If i still get ignored, then ill have to move on. : /

No. The point of moving on is taking initiative to step away from something that's not good for you. Moving on is something you must decide to do yourself, not something you're forced into because the other person no longer contacts you.

I didnt know then because i was all caught up and needy and insecure, so i thought i was acting ok, when in reality i was the one who was doing things wrong. I thought i was doing the right thing, when now i realize i was just coming off controlling to her. I just need her to talk to me and at least just be friendly and civil to me.

You're missing the point. You're still acting that way.

[dmeek7]

pretty much everyone you ask will tell you to give her space. women need space in times of confusing situations and other situations and you have to comply to her need of space. When she does talk to you, be sincere and let her know you are there to talk about anything.

[Necroxfiendx07]

Yeah, I guess I really have no choice but to wait. Its been 4 days since ive said anything to her, and i still have many more days to go. Hopefully absence will make the heart grow fonder and she'll miss me. Or maybe even if she ends up dating around, maybe by some chance she'll see the grass isn't always greener. Everyone's entitled to a few screw ups. I'm just starting to get suspicious of another man involved. I saw a few pics that where border-line "close friend / boy friend " looking but there isn't enough evidence anyways, and I need to keep my mind occupied, not allow my paranoia to drive me up a wall. Hopefully she was honest with everything she said to me. Cause if she is, then all she needs is time. They say true love never subsides, so if she really does have the feelings for me that she said she did, maybe in the near future she'll find it in her heart to allow herself to open up to me again. I can only hope. Any other suggestions?

[Sage]

Any other suggestions?

Stop thinking so much about how great it'll be to get back together and try to accept and plan for the likelihood that it's over between you two and that there are other great women out there. I'm not saying you should totally give up hope, but I think you're going through some excessive wishful thinking here, Anthony.

[Weeping]

Just.. Leave her alone for a while.. :)

Good Luck! :hug:

[Necroxfiendx07]

Stop thinking so much about how great it'll be to get back together and try to accept and plan for the likelihood that it's over between you two and that there are other great women out there. I'm not saying you should totally give up hope, but I think you're going through some excessive wishful thinking here, Anthony.

Im trying to be as realistic as possible. I know the chance of getting her back in my life is no more likely than the chance of her never coming back. I just want to sre if anyone else has some insight as to why things are going the way they are, and to see how confident people are in her contacting me if i leave her alone for a while.

[Sage]

Im trying to be as realistic as possible. I know the chance of getting her back in my life is no more likely than the chance of her never coming back.

No, that's not being realistic at all. The reality is that the odds are against you.

[dmeek7]

If it doesn't work out for you, you could always just be friends with her right? wouldn't you rather be in her life as a friend than not in her life at all?. That's what i keep in mind with a couple of my ex's.

[Necroxfiendx07]

No, that's not being realistic at all. The reality is that the odds are against you.

Well technically, i never said the odds weren't against me. I just said the chances aren't any better for her coming back. I know what the odds are. Im just trying to keep a positive head. We had a year and a half of a healthy relationship, no lies, no secrets. We always showed eachother a lot of love, she just couldnt take trying anymore because whenever we got into a really big fght that resulted in the relaionship almost ending, we would always pick it back up, until the next big fight. (and they didnt happen that often). She was just tired of my issues, my insecurities, and my needyness. So if shes being honest with her reasoning, in time theres no doubt in my head she'll contact me. Not to get back together, but just to have eachother in our lives. And then if feelings are still there, who knows, we could always grow from there. Thats what im shooting for

[Necroxfiendx07]

Any more tips? Suggestions?