A Problem

[Azunite]

So this girl, she is from my class...

Thing is, we talk every night! We talk on the phone sometimes, we talk on facebook for ages! We text each other every moment, we comment on each other's photos...

But when I go to school the next day, everything seems changed. ıt is like she is someone else. I am not saying she acts cold to me but when my friends saw all those comments, all those text messages and things on facebook, they are like "Dude is she your gf or something?"

She doesn't pay attention to me as she pays attention to several other boys and yes I am jealous!
Do you think of any reasons ?

[BreatheHopeIntoMe]

I would say that you probably grew attatched to her. You two became close only to be suddenly wrenched away by others views on the friendship. The best thing to do would be to give her-her space so that she can figure out what to do from there. She probably still wants to be friends, but just doesn't want people thinking she's dating you. Or, the latter would be that she's confused on what she wants.

[Azunite]

Thanks for the reply...
Well I don't know... She seems to close to other boys in class in school. But I never hear the boys telling me that they text or do anything after school.
From my perspective, well she laughs at my jokes, I ask her questions in German classes, she asks me questions in English classes. When I go home I talk to her and do other stuff.

And well I doubt she thinks anything about dating, as I said she has a boyfriend. By the way she is quite naive so I doubt she will know that people think we would be dating ( as I said, these are people who she doesn't know )

[Amnesiac]

Just because you talk to a girl, even if it's a lot, doesn't mean anything will happen. Trust me bro, I learned it the hard way. Sometimes girls just like having a guy to talk to, and that's a good thing.

[The Madman]

I agree.
Some girls just want a guy friend who won't be all creepy and " I wanna be your boyfriend ", some girls just want a friend who will look out for them and chat to them like a sane person. It is very good. If you are talking to this girl but she doesn't want to be your girlfriend then just leave it at that.

If you really do like her then here is what to do, im not saying it will work but maybe..

So just remain friends with her for as long as you want. If one day, ( hypothitcally ) she breaks up with her boyfriends then just be caring and supportive of her, DO NOT just ask her straight away to go out with you. She should eventually see that you are kind and nice and you may get to go out with her.

As for convos on facebook etc etc. I wouldn't talk to her on the status's or that if you don't want people to get the wrong idea. Use the chat bar or use the inbox PM, or MSN too.

If you arent that close I wouldn't text her very personal stuff as she might just show her friends and then you are in a whole heap of sh*t.

Anyway, Hope I helped.

The Flame

[Azunite]

Well I do post on her wall ( but not serious stuff lol, just some jokes ) but we have our talks with chat. And well she doesn't tell me a lot of her personal stuff, and I wouldn't ask her about it...

But I want to get close to this girl as much as possible because when the next schoolyear begins, they will shuffle the classes and there is a chance we won't be in the same class. And alright, it is no problem with boys because you are super close to them and won't have any problems after classes change but girls are different. In my opinion girls are keen on forgetting old boy friends ( unless they are super close, or handsome ..)
And I have seen other girls around the school, in my grade ( well this is my first year in Highschool ) and they don't look good ( by good I dont mean appearance ). But she is both beautiful and kind, a rare girl :)
So my priority thing would be to build up a strong and stable friendship, but for a month now things just seem stalled...

[The Madman]

Rare indeed.
I would just back-off ever so slightly. Just keep talking to her but don't try to take anything up or the "next level" ( not dating ) if you know what I mean. Just keep being her friend and let her trust you and you can work on omproving your friendship.

[dmeek7]

Well the question you have to ask yourself is "do I like her?" If you like her and want to be with her as her boyfriend and her as your girlfriend, then you can't be such a "friend" to her. Girls have Girlfriends to talk to about their feelings and stuff. They don't want to date a guy they are super good friends with, b/c they are always scared of ruining the friendship. You can't be super good friends with her if you want to be with her because once you are in the "friend zone" you are basically doomed to be there the rest of your friendship with her.

If you DON'T like her and you JUST want to be good friends with her, then keep doing what you are doing. Talk to her about regular stuff, and if she trusts you enough she will tell you personal stuff when she's ready.

As for the school situation. Say "Hi" to her in the halls every now and then (not everytime you see her but in the moring when you first see each other. and maybe once or twice the rest of the day). Also in the hallways, walk with her to a class if you are goin the same direction and ask her some normal questions (like do you understand what is going on in....and then say a certain class you both take) or talk to her about something you would talk to in facebook or when you text. eventually, hopefully she will start to talk to you first, and open up to you.

[Azunite]

Well the question you have to ask yourself is "do I like her?" If you like her and want to be with her as her boyfriend and her as your girlfriend, then you can't be such a "friend" to her. Girls have Girlfriends to talk to about their feelings and stuff. They don't want to date a guy they are super good friends with, b/c they are always scared of ruining the friendship. You can't be super good friends with her if you want to be with her because once you are in the "friend zone" you are basically doomed to be there the rest of your friendship with her.

If you DON'T like her and you JUST want to be good friends with her, then keep doing what you are doing. Talk to her about regular stuff, and if she trusts you enough she will tell you personal stuff when she's ready.

As for the school situation. Say "Hi" to her in the halls every now and then (not everytime you see her but in the moring when you first see each other. and maybe once or twice the rest of the day). Also in the hallways, walk with her to a class if you are goin the same direction and ask her some normal questions (like do you understand what is going on in....and then say a certain class you both take) or talk to her about something you would talk to in facebook or when you text. eventually, hopefully she will start to talk to you first, and open up to you.

So, for the first and second paragraph, yes I do like her.

For the third paragraph, it will happen next year :D