I want to cut

[MadManWithaBox]

I want to cut. So badly. So badly I can't think of anything else. I want the pain, and I want blood. And it hurts

[Tristin.]

Please don't :O

whats making you want to cut? maybe you can solve your problem? :)

[georgiamay]

You've helped me through some pretty tough times Matt, and I'd like to return the favour, so I'm here for you if you ever need anything.

You don't need it. It won't be worth it, because once the rush is over, nothing will have changed, and you know it. Everyone here is willing to help you.

Instead of cutting away the pain, it would be so much better if you tried to sort it out instead. Cutting won't solve anything, in fact it'll make it worse.

No one deserves to feel like they want to cut, and people are out there to help you and listen, including me :hug3:

[MadManWithaBox]

But I really want to. And I don't know how not to.

[georgiamay]

Go out. Anywhere, just go for a walk, so you won't be at home.

[MadManWithaBox]

But if I go out, I'm gonna be tempted to do something worse. Like cut with glass off the ground. Or jump out in front of a car.

[whereismymind]

Just try to think of something positive or go out for a run maybe? that helps me sometimes.

[MadManWithaBox]

I can't I can't think of anything else.

[1_21Guns]

Mat no, you're better than it and you know it.
You come out with such empowering statements, take your own advice.
You don't need to slip back Mat, you really don't.

:hug3:

[MadManWithaBox]

Even Churchill himself failed sometimes. And I'm sitting here with myvraxots, and the temptation is overwhelming

[1_21Guns]

It'll only ever control you as much as you let it, and you're stronger than it.

[MadManWithaBox]

I thought I was, but I'm not. I can't do it.

[1_21Guns]

Remember what you used to say to me when I said things like that?
You're an amazing person Matt, don't you dare let yourself think anything otherwise.

[Bath]

Don't do it. But I know the feeling, when you want to, you want to, you have to pull yourself out of it..

just, don't do it. :/

[Mike321]

Come on Matt, you are better than this, like Nat said you are an amazing person, you always help people out
You post really inspiring things, dont do it
You can get through this

[MadManWithaBox]

I don't think I am. I think I'm the worst person alive, and I deserve this.

[1_21Guns]

Nobody deserves it, ever.
Look at how many people you've helped, the countless times you've saved some of us.
That makes a horrible person does it?
No.
I think you are, that must count for something?

[UnknownError]

Matt come on, what about the other day, saying we were all amazing? And now your saying you deserve this?
Personally I believe the first one about you. :)
Dont cut, its not worth it.

[JCake]

I don't know you very well, but I know personally that cutting is not worth it. No matter how bad you feel, just think of how much better things can get. Cutting isn't the only option, write poetry, listen to music, do whatever you'd like to do, just don't cut. From what I read in a couple other people's posts, you've helped out some people, help yourself out, think about if it were someone else, how would you tell them to control themselves?

[MadManWithaBox]

I don't know. I'm in capable of thinking of anything other than running the razor down my wrist.

[1_21Guns]

you're typing on here aren't you?
you're not incapable Matt, you're just fighting yourself.
Keep going.

[MadManWithaBox]

Only cos of you. You guys. I don't want to let you down. Desires still there and It's so strong I feel sick

[1_21Guns]

It's never gonna be easy Matt, not really,
you're a fighter, keep going.
Don't let yourself down either.
:hug3:

[MadManWithaBox]

I knew it was hard. Just not this hard.