Number02
November 8th, 2010, 10:46 AM
I'm aware of the Guide To Making Friends that Gumleaf has so helpfully posted above, but I thought I'd make this addition.
This isn't necessarily just for making friends, it could just be used as a tool for making conversation with stranger, if you're in a tight spot for whatever reason.
Okay, so visualize this situation: You're out, with a group of people for your friend's birthday. The only person you know in this group of people is your friend, the rest of them are complete strangers.
You're sat down in a restaurant, and your friend and one of the other strangers go to the toilet. That leaves you left sat with a complete stranger whom you've known for a grand total of about 45 minutes.
Huh? What? What do you say? How can you possibly carry off a conversation?
Well, if the person you're sat with finds something to talk about that's of interest, then you've got something there. Ask questions if the topic is something you're unfamiliar with, or offer your opinions/experiences if you are familiar with it.
If, however, the stranger remains silent, and you're unable to come up with anything of interest, then don't be afraid to be quiet. You are under no obligation to force a conversation. The chances are they are more comfortable with silence, so it would be prudent to follow suit.
I do know how it feels to be in that situation - like you have to say something, but you're struggling to think of anything. You feel like a fish out of water, that somehow you're worth less because you talk less than others. You are really not worth less if you talk less - in fact your opinion would be more respected if you kept your reserve.
Remember, attentive company is better than nonsensical chatter.
And most importantly it is ok to be quiet!
Hope this helps, feel free to ask any kind of questions etc.
I heavily referenced from here. (http://www.taoism.net/enter.htm)
This isn't necessarily just for making friends, it could just be used as a tool for making conversation with stranger, if you're in a tight spot for whatever reason.
Okay, so visualize this situation: You're out, with a group of people for your friend's birthday. The only person you know in this group of people is your friend, the rest of them are complete strangers.
You're sat down in a restaurant, and your friend and one of the other strangers go to the toilet. That leaves you left sat with a complete stranger whom you've known for a grand total of about 45 minutes.
Huh? What? What do you say? How can you possibly carry off a conversation?
Well, if the person you're sat with finds something to talk about that's of interest, then you've got something there. Ask questions if the topic is something you're unfamiliar with, or offer your opinions/experiences if you are familiar with it.
If, however, the stranger remains silent, and you're unable to come up with anything of interest, then don't be afraid to be quiet. You are under no obligation to force a conversation. The chances are they are more comfortable with silence, so it would be prudent to follow suit.
I do know how it feels to be in that situation - like you have to say something, but you're struggling to think of anything. You feel like a fish out of water, that somehow you're worth less because you talk less than others. You are really not worth less if you talk less - in fact your opinion would be more respected if you kept your reserve.
Remember, attentive company is better than nonsensical chatter.
And most importantly it is ok to be quiet!
Hope this helps, feel free to ask any kind of questions etc.
I heavily referenced from here. (http://www.taoism.net/enter.htm)