Lifeguard18
October 9th, 2010, 10:23 PM
ok so me and my bf had broke up last month. it was a long time ago i know but i keep forgetting to make a post so im doing it now before i forget again. lol.
ok so like i said, we broke up last month and i have to say i wasnt really all that upset. i expected it a lot and i kind of wanted to. the first two weeks we went out was perfect, then when we talked more and more, he basically only wanted to talk about "our first time," when we should get married, i tried to see you naked on google maps, our own apartment, we should take a shower/bath together one time, etc etc. so if you get what im saying, he basically talked about sex most of the time.
and yes, i have talked about it seriously to him a few times, then it just started to get a little bit too much where at the point i stopped txting him first then at the point where i didnt want to talk to him at all. and sometimes when we flirted, he would say to me, oh your so sexual, when i really wasnt.
and tell me how he says he wont tell anyone who his boyfriend is, then he goes and tell people this, "yeah i have a boyfriend but i cant tell you his name." hes told me that he told a huge amount of people that where one person actually guessed my name. and he said no hes straight just to cover it. Which leads to something else, coming out.
So he keep telling me to come out, come out, youll feel so much better and respected, no one will do anything, this and that. i keep on telling him i will come out when i want to, not on your damn benefit so we can still go out. ive told him so many times that i will come out when i want to and he always said, ok i respect that. and a day or two later, he would tell me, you should really start coming out more. then i started to get pissed and i said to him, "i told you so many times that i will come out to more people when i want to come out." its like he never got the damn message.
and another thing that i didnt like out of the relationship, doing stuff. no not getting it in or anything. like everytime we hung out which wasnt much, all he wanted to do was basically make out and experiment. Which we just j/o each other, that was it. the first time i was ok with it then he keep wanting to do it more. i pulled away from him so many times when he wanted to make out with. like, do you not get what im doing. im pushing you away and im pulling myself away, i dont want to make out anymore. i tried telling him in different ways that he would see what im saying, but he didnt get it.
i even walked backwards from him to his computer to see what kind of music he has on itunes just so he would stop.
and he would buy me stuff so he wouldnt be a bad boyfriend. he asked me so many times if he wanted to get me stuff. i would say no. when i went over to his house he straightened my hair which i really liked a lot. so you know i was obsessed about my hair for a while cause it was straightened then i didnt care for it as much anymore. then one time he sends me a txt saying, what would your mom say if i got you a hair straightener? i said, "Why. did you buy me one." of course he said yes. which pissed me off cause he didnt ask me first.
yes i wanted a straightener but that was only like a day after he did it to my hair, then i didnt care for one anymore. so now i have a hair straightener that i have to hide in my old laptop cast so my mom wont find it. and if she does find it, ALL HELL WILL BREAK LOOSE I SWEAR! and my dad know about me being bi and he doesnt care, but i will save that for a different post. i used the straightener like 6 times, but that was after school so my parents wouldnt know i had one. like i just played around with it, but i cant actually style it in the morning and getting questions like, what did you do to your hair. when i came home that day from my house, my mom said my hair looked awful like that. i have a straightener that i cant even use. and idk what to do with it. so im gonna stop the straightener story there cause its goes way too too long of a story.
theres A LOT MORE i want to talk about but i dont want to make a whole entire essay. lol. so yeah we broke up and im actually glad we did. and i dont even talk to him anymore cause if i try to, i know hes gonna try to want me to go back out with him.
ok so like i said, we broke up last month and i have to say i wasnt really all that upset. i expected it a lot and i kind of wanted to. the first two weeks we went out was perfect, then when we talked more and more, he basically only wanted to talk about "our first time," when we should get married, i tried to see you naked on google maps, our own apartment, we should take a shower/bath together one time, etc etc. so if you get what im saying, he basically talked about sex most of the time.
and yes, i have talked about it seriously to him a few times, then it just started to get a little bit too much where at the point i stopped txting him first then at the point where i didnt want to talk to him at all. and sometimes when we flirted, he would say to me, oh your so sexual, when i really wasnt.
and tell me how he says he wont tell anyone who his boyfriend is, then he goes and tell people this, "yeah i have a boyfriend but i cant tell you his name." hes told me that he told a huge amount of people that where one person actually guessed my name. and he said no hes straight just to cover it. Which leads to something else, coming out.
So he keep telling me to come out, come out, youll feel so much better and respected, no one will do anything, this and that. i keep on telling him i will come out when i want to, not on your damn benefit so we can still go out. ive told him so many times that i will come out when i want to and he always said, ok i respect that. and a day or two later, he would tell me, you should really start coming out more. then i started to get pissed and i said to him, "i told you so many times that i will come out to more people when i want to come out." its like he never got the damn message.
and another thing that i didnt like out of the relationship, doing stuff. no not getting it in or anything. like everytime we hung out which wasnt much, all he wanted to do was basically make out and experiment. Which we just j/o each other, that was it. the first time i was ok with it then he keep wanting to do it more. i pulled away from him so many times when he wanted to make out with. like, do you not get what im doing. im pushing you away and im pulling myself away, i dont want to make out anymore. i tried telling him in different ways that he would see what im saying, but he didnt get it.
i even walked backwards from him to his computer to see what kind of music he has on itunes just so he would stop.
and he would buy me stuff so he wouldnt be a bad boyfriend. he asked me so many times if he wanted to get me stuff. i would say no. when i went over to his house he straightened my hair which i really liked a lot. so you know i was obsessed about my hair for a while cause it was straightened then i didnt care for it as much anymore. then one time he sends me a txt saying, what would your mom say if i got you a hair straightener? i said, "Why. did you buy me one." of course he said yes. which pissed me off cause he didnt ask me first.
yes i wanted a straightener but that was only like a day after he did it to my hair, then i didnt care for one anymore. so now i have a hair straightener that i have to hide in my old laptop cast so my mom wont find it. and if she does find it, ALL HELL WILL BREAK LOOSE I SWEAR! and my dad know about me being bi and he doesnt care, but i will save that for a different post. i used the straightener like 6 times, but that was after school so my parents wouldnt know i had one. like i just played around with it, but i cant actually style it in the morning and getting questions like, what did you do to your hair. when i came home that day from my house, my mom said my hair looked awful like that. i have a straightener that i cant even use. and idk what to do with it. so im gonna stop the straightener story there cause its goes way too too long of a story.
theres A LOT MORE i want to talk about but i dont want to make a whole entire essay. lol. so yeah we broke up and im actually glad we did. and i dont even talk to him anymore cause if i try to, i know hes gonna try to want me to go back out with him.