Porn= eye cheating

[Asylum]

Now.. my opinion on porn is that it is "eye cheating". Let me explain.. a guy is looking a naked girl and getting excited... eye cheating!! now..


what is your opinion?

note: don't bash other people's opinions, just explain yours, ask questions on what other people htink and why. you can ask them to elaborate if you don't understand... etc.

[Amnesiac]

It's not cheating, the guy doesn't even know the people he's looking at. It's just a natural and acceptable form of sexual release. That's why a multibillion dollar industry's been built off of it.

[Perseus]

I actually agree with you; I've carried this idea with me for the past two years. If you have a girlfriend, then you don't really need to look at porn.

[deadpie]

I actually agree with you; I've carried this idea with me for the past two years. If you have a girlfriend, then you don't really need to look at porn.

And what if you and your girlfriend want to watch some exciting erotic film? You'd be surprised how many couples do it.

Plus porn can be allot about sexual frustration. So even if you do have a girlfriend, sometimes you can't always fuck her nor will she even let you. So that doesn't solve the problem of sexual frustration. Plus, what's wrong with porn in the first place?

Committed relationships are bullshit. If they do work then they're extremely boring.


note: don't bash other people's opinions, just explain yours, ask questions on what other people htink and why. you can ask them to elaborate if you don't understand... etc.

Then this topic should of never been posting in ROTW if you can't bash people's opinions / debate and dissect the posts. Deal with it.

[Perseus]

And what if you and your girlfriend want to watch some exciting erotic film? You'd be surprised how many couples do it.
I know there are couples that do that; I don't see anything wrong. I meant when just the sole person is doing it.
Plus porn can be allot about sexual frustration. So even if you do have a girlfriend, sometimes you can't always fuck her nor will she even let you. So that doesn't solve the problem of sexual frustration. Plus, what's wrong with porn in the first place?

I never said there was anything wrong with porn; I'm just saying in general if you want to get off you don't really have to use porn. I wasn't entirely talking about sex saying you have a girlfriend or whoever. You can always masturbate to her or whoever.

[The Batman]

Be glad a guy would rather watch porn than pressure you to have sex. Seriously it's not eye cheating it's doing what all guys do and it's no worse than being attracted to someone that you're not dating. If someone is that insecure that they think by watching porn their bf is cheating on them then they need to look at themself and figure out why it's a problem.

[deadpie]

Be glad a guy would rather watch porn than pressure you to have sex. Seriously it's not eye cheating it's doing what all guys do and it's no worse than being attracted to someone that you're not dating. If someone is that insecure that they think by watching porn their bf is cheating on them then they need to look at themself and figure out why it's a problem.

http://img641.imageshack.us/img641/7408/clappingz.gif


This post is probably the best in this topic. You sir win a billion brownie points. I definitely agree with all that is said in this.


Truly, is looking at porn in an relationship as bad as pressure into sex? I don't think so.

Porn solves more problems then it creates. Deal with it.

[Andrew0017]

I agree 100%, and I'm a perfectly happy, straight guy. Yes, shocking right? I've never watched porn in my life, and I have absolutely no interest. The idea of watching a bunch of naked tramps pretending to have sex makes me want to gag. Let alone watching it during a relationship. I view that as definitely cheating. I have an amazing girlfriend, why would I personally want or need to watch porn?

And just want to point out, in disagreeing with deadpie, that I do find committed relationships boring at all. My girlfriend and I have a very exciting, satisfying relationship. There are many different things you can do to make a long lasting relationship fun, such as roleplay, among other things. It's all what you make of it.

Believe me when I say that not every guy out there has the desire to watch porn. A large percentage do, but not all. Many of my friends do not and a lot of them are single!

[The Joker]

Many of my friends do not and a lot of them are single!

That's what they tell you. They probably fap in the night to 2 Girls 1 Cup.

[steve1234]

I don't think it is eye cheating. Looking at pornography isn't much different from seeing it in your mind, and no person can control their partner's thoughts. I would have thought most people in a relationship would think of other people naked, its natural, and pornography is not much different from that.

[Kaius]

Tbh I agree with the op and Jake, It feels like cheating to me. I'm not honestly sure of the reason why, but it always has done.

[Sogeking]

And what if you and your girlfriend want to watch some exciting erotic film? You'd be surprised how many couples do it.

People shouldn't need to look at films to help your sex life

Plus porn can be allot about sexual frustration. So even if you do have a girlfriend, sometimes you can't always fuck her nor will she even let you. So that doesn't solve the problem of sexual frustration.

There are other ways to work that out. Watching porn doesn't help

Plus, what's wrong with porn in the first place?

There are alot of things wrong with porn (http://www.surfrecon.com/get-help/10-things-parents-need-to-know-about-pornography.php)


Committed relationships are bullshit. If they do work then they're extremely boring.

So you would rather prefer she cheats on you to keep the relationship alive?

[Nickbee]

I dont think i wuold call it cheating, well i dont have a girlfriend so i don't think i would know. Well if your a guy, you cant have sex all the time can you? and boys masturbate a lot. So porn just kinda... helps? haha.

[Amnesiac]

People shouldn't need to look at films to help your sex life

There are other ways to work that out. Watching porn doesn't help

How a couple wants to manage their sex life should be up to them. If they want to be able to look at porn, then they should. It's their choice, not society's.

There are alot of things wrong with porn (http://www.surfrecon.com/get-help/10-things-parents-need-to-know-about-pornography.php)

The list you posted provides absolutely no citations for the statements it makes. Therefore, it is not reliable for use in a debate.

[Andrew0017]

That's what they tell you. They probably fap in the night to 2 Girls 1 Cup.

I want to know why is it that whenever someone mentions other people they know who don't watch porn, it immediately gets attacked with petty accusations like these? Someone assuming that the person mentioned lied. Not to be rude, but I'm the one who has known them for over 10 years, not you. (We grew up together.) I'd like to think I know my own best friends well enough to be able to realize when they're telling me the truth.
Not that it matters, but the one friend doesn't even have good internet access at his house. It takes him hours just to load his Facebook page, and that's without videos or anything on it. So even if he wanted to watch it, which he tells me he doesn't, he couldn't.

[Perseus]

People shouldn't need to look at films to help your sex life Why not?



There are other ways to work that out. Watching porn doesn't help Name a few. You obviously seem against masturbation, which doesn't require pron, if you didn't know that.

[Spreadingwings]

My opinion is the same thing but different, if a person is looking at a naked person in a lustful way and does not push his/herself away from those perverted thoughts & feelings and is in a relationship. Then that person is guilty of eye cheating.

[Amnesiac]

Wow, you guys are irritatingly conservative. How can you cheat on someone with porn? Is that even possible?

Over 90% of men masturbate, are they all cheating on their wives/girlfriends because they don't use her for sexual release every time they get excited? No, of course not, looking at porn is no different.

[The Batman]

It's human nature be attracted to other people and you can't fight that. "Look but don't touch" is all that should matter. It's just like trying to arrest someone for thinking about stealing a car.

[Errr]

i disagree completely. everyone looks at others. its human nature.It isnt like your having sex or ANY physical contact. OR even emotional!

[The Joker]

I agree Tom. If that's cheating, then this is 1984 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thought_crime).

[Amnesiac]

I agree Tom. If that's cheating, then this is 1984 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thought_crime).

I applaud your reference to one of the greatest novels of the 20th century.

Remember guys, every time you look at porn, big brother is watching you. Don't want the thought police on your tails, now do you? We all know what the Junior Anti-Sex League thinks of your betrayal of the Party.

[Zephyr]

Will porn hurt your partner's feelings? Maybe. It is cheating? No. If you're so paranoid that you consider pornography as cheating, I think that you have issues with insecurity. You can't help but having a feeling for sexual activity. I'm all for monogamy once you're at a certain point in a relationship, but the same partner is never going to get you off 100% of the time. Hell, humans haven't always been a monogamous species. I'd rather find my partner watching porn than actually cheating and having sex with somebody else. If people seriously consider porn cheating, then what's next? Thought cheating? I can see where porn can cause a slippery slope into actual cheating due to boredom in the bedroom, but in itself, porn is not cheating.

Your insecurities with porn watching =/= Cheating

Hurt feelings due to porn watching =/= Cheating

[Continuum]

It's what people want, why not give it? It's a natural urge, and it's best to satisfy it as much as possible.

I agree Tom. If that's cheating, then this is 1984 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thought_crime).

I wanted to read that book next time I borrow from the library. :D

[Andrew0017]

[QUOTE=TheDarthEgg;1037069]Wow, you guys are irritatingly conservative. How can you cheat on someone with porn? Is that even possible?
/QUOTE]

Irritatingly conservative? I think not. But if that's what you are convinced that I am, then so be it. I'm proud to be different. My "irritating conservative" ways got me into a steady, long lasting relationship with an awesome girl, unlike so many other couples our age, so I must not be too bad. :P
I like to consider myself as being respectful to my girlfriend by not having any interest in viewing porn. It's sad that more guys aren't like this. That they can't simply be completely satisfied by one person. That's why I think porn is cheating. But, I suppose that's how our society is. Not trying to judge, just merely voicing my concerns.

[Sage]

I like to consider myself as being respectful to my girlfriend by not having any interest in viewing porn.

>Implying one has control over what they find interesting.

[Andrew0017]

>Implying one has control over what they find interesting.

I do. Can't speak for other guys, but nothing about it appeals to me. I don't want to see a bunch of naked, fake, ugly, sluts doing shit together, to put it bluntly.

[Sage]

but nothing about it appeals to me.

And what I'm saying is that you don't consciously make the decision to find that unappealing, it's just how you feel.

[The Batman]

Irritatingly conservative? I think not. But if that's what you are convinced that I am, then so be it. I'm proud to be different. My "irritating conservative" ways got me into a steady, long lasting relationship with an awesome girl, unlike so many other couples our age, so I must not be too bad. :P
I like to consider myself as being respectful to my girlfriend by not having any interest in viewing porn. It's sad that more guys aren't like this. That they can't simply be completely satisfied by one person. That's why I think porn is cheating. But, I suppose that's how our society is. Not trying to judge, just merely voicing my concerns.
Porn isn't someone else satisfying you it's watching a video of people having sex and getting off to it. What about them reading erotic stories, or watching hentai? If it's that they are real people that can easily be changed to something fake. No one will ever be just attracted to one person and if they are then they are lying about it. Can you honestly say you've never thought about anyone other than your girlfriend in any sexual way or even been attracted to them?

[Andrew0017]

Porn isn't someone else satisfying you it's watching a video of people having sex and getting off to it. What about them reading erotic stories, or watching hentai? If it's that they are real people that can easily be changed to something fake. No one will ever be just attracted to one person and if they are then they are lying about it. Can you honestly say you've never thought about anyone other than your girlfriend in any sexual way or even been attracted to them?

Yes, I honestly can. I don't want any other girls, I only want her. I'm extremely picky with what I like in girls and she is the only one I've seen who is everything that I find attractive.
It's really not that hard to understand. Sure there are girls who aren't as bad as some, but I wouldn't call them "attractive." Just not "terrible."

[Sage]

Yes, I honestly can. I don't want any other girls, I only want her. I'm extremely picky with what I like in girls and she is the only one I've seen who is everything that I find attractive.

Yeah, I said things like that when I had a girlfriend too.

[Andrew0017]

Yeah, I said things like that when I had a girlfriend too.

Your point being? Not every guy is a horndog who feels the need to jack off to porn and drool over other meaningless skanks. I'm sick of them all being generalized as such, all because of a few. It's an insult to the guys out there like me who truly only love one and are happy that way.

[Sage]

Not every guy is a horndog who feels the need to jack off to porn and drool over other meaningless skanks.

I hope you're not insinuating anything, because those are some pretty loaded words.

[The Batman]

Your point being? Not every guy is a horndog who feels the need to jack off to porn and drool over other meaningless skanks. I'm sick of them all being generalized as such, all because of a few. It's not a few and it's not just guys. No one in the world is only attracted to one person and to say that you are is a lie. There's nothing wrong with finding other people attractive and theirs nothing wrong with watching porn hell even going to a strip club is debatable, you just feel as if you have some type of loyalty you owe to your girlfriend so by even looking at another chick it's wrong and she should leave you forever. If you really do feel that way there's no way in hell a relationship like that can work out because not only does it scream a clingy insecure person but it borders obsessive and is not healthy. It's an insult to the guys out there like me who truly only love one and are happy that way.

Says the guy calling every chick in a porno an ugly skank or a slut.

[Andrew0017]

I hope you're not insinuating anything, because those are some pretty loaded words.

Now I'm just pissed off. How dare you people sit there and accuse me of lying about MY own personality and what I like, when I would be the one to know what I like more than any of you. You don't know the first thing about me.
If none of you can understand that still, then I'm just at an utter loss for words because I believe I've made myself clear enough times.
Edit: Don't bring my girlfriend into this either. Why would she leave me forever? I love her, and she loves me. She's on these forums to second that. She tells me all the time how she loves my unique, loyal personality and how I don't drool over other girls like so many guys do. And I do think chicks who are in porn are sluts. Same goes for stripclubs.

[Sage]

You don't know the first thing about me.
Probably not, but I am taking (and excelling) in an undergraduate level Psychology course with an emphasis on sexual nature and other things, and to deny a part of your biology that you share with all other humans is absurd.

I don't know you, but I know you have a brain, and I know how brains work.


Edit: Don't bring my girlfriend into this either.
When did I do that?

Why would she leave me forever? I love her, and she loves me. She's on these forums to second that. She tells me all the time how she loves my unique, loyal personality and how I don't drool over other girls like so many guys do.
That's good for you man, but I don't see why you're so defensive over this.

[Andrew0017]

Probably not, but I am taking (and excelling) in an undergraduate level Psychology course with an emphasis on sexual nature and other things, and to deny a part of your biology that you share with all other humans is absurd.

Please do not try to diagnose me. That's just...no. I can't even formulate any words to describe how irritated that makes me.
I'm sorry I'm different, I guess that's all I can say to you. I'm not trying to deny what other humans are like. I'm telling you what I think. And I only want one.
I think the reason this is so hard to understand is because you're so used to hearing guys go on and on about all the chicks they see that they find hot. Well, I'm not like that and I never have been.
And Sage I know you didn't bring Jenna into this, I was talking to "The Batman." I'm not getting defensive over what you stated, but I was talking to him in the same post, that way I wouldn't be double-posting. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

[Sage]

Oh...so you think you can diagnose my "problems" because you're taking Psych courses? Haha, wow.
I never said you had a "problem", don't put words in my mouth. And no, I can't do a proper diagnosis of anything over the internet, but as I said- you have a brain, and your brain is wired to have sexual desires. To only be attracted to a single person is biologically and neurologically impossible.

you're so used to hearing guys go on and on about all the chicks they see that they find hot.
I seldom discuss women with my friends. Again, you're making faulty assumptions, and I find it condescending in the highest sense of the word.

And Sage I know you didn't bring Jenna into this, I was talking to "The Batman." Sorry for the misunderstanding.
Fair enough.

[Andrew0017]

I never said you had a "problem", don't put words in my mouth. And no, I can't do a proper diagnosis of anything over the internet, but as I said- you have a brain, and your brain is wired to have sexual desires. To only be attracted to a single person is biologically and neurologically impossible.



Okay, I see what you're saying and I too know of that since I am extremely interested in biology and psychology so I have a relatively good idea of human nature (I am nowhere near an expert at all but you see what I'm saying), but I honestly can't recall a time when I watched another girl out in public or where ever and was all "wow she's very attractive." Like I stated earlier, the best example I might be able to give you is the fact that I have seen girls that I'd say are "okay" compared to most (since I do find a large percentage rather unattractive, mainly because of the whole "fake" thing that seems to be the trend right now), but I wouldn't call them "pretty/hot/gorgeous" or anything of the sort.
I guess if you guys all consider me strange, well...okay then. You're entitled to your opinion but I am how I am, I'm not going to try to change the way I think just because it's not "the most normal thing for guys" or whatever.

[The Batman]

Now I'm just pissed off. How dare you people sit there and accuse me of lying about MY own personality and what I like, when I would be the one to know what I like more than any of you. You don't know the first thing about me.
If none of you can understand that still, then I'm just at an utter loss for words because I believe I've made myself clear enough times.
Edit: Don't bring my girlfriend into this either. Why would she leave me forever? I love her, and she loves me. She's on these forums to second that. She tells me all the time how she loves my unique, loyal personality and how I don't drool over other girls like so many guys do. And I do think chicks who are in porn are sluts. Same goes for stripclubs.

Didn't really bring her into it just saying how things like that usually go. Anyways live I've said probably twice before it's human nature to be attracted to more than one person and there's no problem with it, it's more of how you act and what's going through your mind. There is a thing as thought emotional cheating when you're emotionally attached to someone that isn't your bf or gf but if you're just watching it and not wanting it to go any farther then there's nothing wrong with getting off to porn.

[Sith Lord 13]

I agree Tom. If that's cheating, then this is 1984 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thought_crime).

This comment is win.

Honestly, there is one time and one time only that porn is cheating, and that's when you're choosing to jerk off to porn rather than satisfy your partner.

That said, there are certain benefits to going without porn while in a relationship. The less frequently you orgasm, the more intense they tend to be. Also, some find it erotic to know they're saving themselves for their partner. (Orgasm denial)

[Hatsune Miku]

There are alot of things wrong with porn (http://www.surfrecon.com/get-help/10-things-parents-need-to-know-about-pornography.php)



"the Internet contains some of the darkest, most disturbing, and easily-accessible pornography ever created."

What the fuck is this? Black magic?

"And even suicide or death "

Who kills themselves over porn? How do you DIE over porn?

[geniusrocksoutloud]

cheating? i dont understand your point!?

BTW: Im a member +WOOT

[The Dark Lord]

Your point being? Not every guy is a horndog who feels the need to jack off to porn and drool over other meaningless skanks. I'm sick of them all being generalized as such, all because of a few. It's an insult to the guys out there like me who truly only love one and are happy that way.

I think you'll find most guys masterbate, not just the few you allude to.

btw good lesson to learn here- Sage is always right and will always out debate you

[Jenna.]

I think you'll find most guys masterbate, not just the few you allude to.

btw good lesson to learn here- Sage is always right and will always out debate you

Says you. I happened to find him very condescending towards Andrew, so if that's your definition of "always being right and always out debating" then good for you I guess, because in the real world that's not how you win things. Plus, it was a stupid, pointless argument over the internet. Not exactly something to brag about. Just saying. :rolleyes:

[Andrew0017]

Plus, it was a stupid, pointless argument over the internet. Not exactly something to brag about. Just saying. :rolleyes:

Just what I was gonna say. :) I really don't care who wins the argument. It's not important. My life doesn't revolve around insignificant online debates. I joined these forums to be able to post my opinion, not to be a part of some...internet popularity contest.
Getting back on topic, Matty in response to your opinion on what I posted...I realize that many guys masturbate. I don't care, that's their business. It's not wrong, it's just their personal choice. I was merely trying to make a point. Many people generalize guys by saying they "all watch porn, all jack off at every waking moment, all do this, all do that, etc" and it's an insult to the ones like me who don't watch porn or that don't really do any of those things, and yes we do exist.

[The Dark Lord]

Says you. I happened to find him very condescending towards Andrew, so if that's your definition of "always being right and always out debating" then good for you I guess, because in the real world that's not how you win things. Plus, it was a stupid, pointless argument over the internet. Not exactly something to brag about. Just saying. :rolleyes:

Being condesending and patronising someone, giving the impression that you know more about the topic than the other person is exactly the way people win debates. He was correct to use the tone that he did with Andew, who was getting irrational and defensive. It was such a stupid argument that you responded to the post, which says more about you, than me. Also if he needs his girlfriend (or anyone else) to stand up for him, then its little wonder Sage was so patronising.


Just what I was gonna say. :) I really don't care who wins the argument. It's not important. My life doesn't revolve around insignificant online debates. I joined these forums to be able to post my opinion, not to be a part of some...internet popularity contest.
Getting back on topic, Matty in response to your opinion on what I posted...I realize that many guys masturbate. I don't care, that's their business. It's not wrong, it's just their personal choice. I was merely trying to make a point. Many people generalize guys by saying they "all watch porn, all jack off at every waking moment, all do this, all do that, etc" and it's an insult to the ones like me who don't watch porn or that don't really do any of those things, and yes we do exist.

I once read a quote that was along the lines of: "No one talks about God more than those who don't believe in him", which is a bit like you and masterbation. You seem to obsess over masterbation despite protesting that you don't even masterbate. No one actually believes that every single person masterbates, but if you are so concerned with everyone else's masterbating habits, then I suggest you masterbate more often.

[Jenna.]

Being condesending and patronising someone, giving the impression that you know more about the topic than the other person is exactly the way people win debates. He was correct to use the tone that he did with Andew, who was getting irrational and defensive. It was such a stupid argument that you responded to the post, which says more about you, than me. Also if he needs his girlfriend (or anyone else) to stand up for him, then its little wonder Sage was so patronising.






No, that's how people get reputations as arrogant, know-it-all's. You shouldn't need to resort to getting cocky in a debate in order to win.
And from what I read, Andrew's opinions were being attacked, all because he's a little different from most guys. That's no reason to bash somebody. I can see why he was being a little defensive. Imagine being in his shoes.
I responded to your post because you felt the need to bring something up that was over and done with. And not that it's any of your business, but last I checked, stepping in to defend friends (or boyfriends/girlfriends) doesn't make someone "weak." It seems to me that you're implying that it does. In nearly every argument you see, this happens. So you're basically saying that anyone who decides to step in and help out a friend is a weakling? Like you've never done it.

[Andrew0017]

Also if he needs his girlfriend (or anyone else) to stand up for him, then its little wonder Sage was so patronising.




I once read a quote that was along the lines of: "No one talks about God more than those who don't believe in him", which is a bit like you and masterbation. You seem to obsess over masterbation despite protesting that you don't even masterbate. No one actually believes that every single person masterbates, but if you are so concerned with everyone else's masterbating habits, then I suggest you masterbate more often.

What does that have to do with anything? She's my girlfriend, if she sees people acting like assholes towards me when I'm not online to say something myself, I would hope she'd say something. God knows I'd do the same for her. Nobody has a sense of loyalty anymore...
But may I ask why you felt the need to get us all so off topic? This thread was supposed to be about whether or not porn is cheating, not how many people actually masturbate and who won the debate. I'm not "obsessed with masturbating." I'm simply telling you what I have seen/heard.
Going to report the thread now...

[The Dark Lord]

No, that's how people get reputations as arrogant, know-it-all's. You shouldn't need to resort to getting cocky in a debate in order to win.
And from what I read, Andrew's opinions were being attacked, all because he's a little different from most guys. That's no reason to bash somebody. I can see why he was being a little defensive. Imagine being in his shoes.
I responded to your post because you felt the need to bring something up that was over and done with. And not that it's any of your business, but last I checked, stepping in to defend friends (or boyfriends/girlfriends) doesn't make someone "weak." It seems to me that you're implying that it does. In nearly every argument you see, this happens. So you're basically saying that anyone who decides to step in and help out a friend is a weakling? Like you've never done it.

That's not what I'm saying, but at the end of the day it's Andrew's opinion and he should be able to justify it himself. I understand that people share opinions but there's a difference between agreeing with someone and giving your view compared to attacking someone as they don't agree with your boyfriend's. If Andrew can't or wouldn't justify his position then he shouldn't post in the first place.

What does that have to do with anything? She's my girlfriend, if she sees people acting like assholes towards me when I'm not online to say something myself, I would hope she'd say something. God knows I'd do the same for her. Nobody has a sense of loyalty anymore...
But may I ask why you felt the need to get us all so off topic? This thread was supposed to be about whether or not porn is cheating, not how many people actually masturbate and who won the debate. I'm not "obsessed with masturbating." I'm simply telling you what I have seen/heard.
Going to report the thread now...

Why are you posting in ROTW if you don't want your opinions examined and attacked?
------------------------------
My view is porn isn't cheating. The vast majority of guys and many adults watch it. Has anyone else heard of a relationship that has broken down because a partner has been watching too much porn or masterbated too much?

[Sogeking]

Has anyone else heard of a relationship that has broken down because a partner has been watching too much porn or masterbated too much?

I have. It's not impossible. Kind of what Alex said earlier

[Amnesiac]

I have. It's not impossible. Kind of what Alex said earlier

Only the most stuck up and self-centered girlfriend or boyfriend would end a relationship over masturbation or porn.

[Sogeking]

Only the most stuck up and self-centered girlfriend or boyfriend would end a relationship over masturbation or porn.

True. Thats an epic fail. If that happens the person seriously needs to reconsider his/her life

[Amnesiac]

True. Thats an epic fail. If that happens the person seriously needs to reconsider his/her life

Indeed, it's dangerous to be so self-centered that you're jealous when one of the closest people to you wants to be a little independent.

[Sith Lord 13]

Only the most stuck up and self-centered girlfriend or boyfriend would end a relationship over masturbation or porn.

In the case I cited above, it's because one partner has chosen to pleasure themselves to porn instead of pleasuring their partner. When you pick porn over your partner, there's a problem.

[Amnesiac]

In the case I cited above, it's because one partner has chosen to pleasure themselves to porn instead of pleasuring their partner. When you pick porn over your partner, there's a problem.

I agree with that, but if someone's gonna end a relationship because their partner wants to look at porn and/or masturbate in their free time, they have issues.

[huginnmuninn]

I agree with that, but if someone's gonna end a relationship because their partner wants to look at porn and/or masturbate in their free time, they have issues.

but if the partner offers sex and the other person chooses porn/masturbation i think theres a problem

[Amnesiac]

but if the partner offers sex and the other person chooses porn/masturbation i think theres a problem

That's what I just said, if it's interfering with the relationship it's a problem.

[Sogeking]

Indeed, it's dangerous to be so self-centered that you're jealous when one of the closest people to you wants to be a little independent.

I agree that being too clingy can be unhealthy for a relationship. However, you can't just take advantage of your time away from her and "cheat" on her. I will always stay faithul to my gfs, and will show my respect by refraining from watching porn. Thats just how I roll. We view things differently from others and that watching porn is cheating to me. It just is.

[Andrew0017]

I agree that being too clingy can be unhealthy for a relationship. However, you can't just take advantage of your time away from her and "cheat" on her. I will always stay faithul to my gfs, and will show my respect by refraining from watching porn. Thats just how I roll. We view things differently from others and that watching porn is cheating to me. It just is.

Agree completely. This is how I think as well. Even before I met my girlfriend I was always a bit grossed out by the idea of porn. I think it was the fact that I knew it wasn't "real" and it's based on something that should go on between two people, not be made into a movie, show or whatever you'd call it. Yeah I'm a little "old fashioned"; you can make fun of me all you want but it won't change who I am and what I think.
If it was possible to give you a million positive rep points, I would. :P

*If you noticed, I'm trying not to say anything that some people might get offended by, since it seems that every time I post anything "anti porn," a huge flame war breaks out. :)

[Amnesiac]

I agree that being too clingy can be unhealthy for a relationship. However, you can't just take advantage of your time away from her and "cheat" on her. I will always stay faithul to my gfs, and will show my respect by refraining from watching porn. Thats just how I roll. We view things differently from others and that watching porn is cheating to me. It just is.

Masturbating ≠ cheating. What a boyfriend or girlfriend does in their free time is up to them, as long as they're not ACTUALLY cheating on their partner by going out with another person.

I'm fine with people wanting to "respect" their girlfriends, it's up to you if you want to be all paranoid and creepily devoted like that, but it doesn't apply to every relationship and it certainly can't be called cheating.

[Aves]

Porn is not "eye cheating". Unless, like stated before, you choose porn over your girlfriend/boyfriend, it is then a problem. Also, I'd rather have my girlfriend watch porn than cheat on me. Just saying.


PS: Andrew, you might be different, you might be lying. We will never know for sure, so STOP taking offense to everything. This is ROTW. It's a DEBATE forum. People will come in and dissect your posts beyond what you said.

[Amnesiac]

PS: Andrew, you might be different, you might be lying. We will never know for sure, so STOP taking offense to everything. This is ROTW. It's a DEBATE forum. People will come in and dissect your posts beyond what you said.

I can't stress this enough. ROTW is hardcore. Nobody here is ever offended at anything, and if you are, then you'll have a hard time debating.

[Andrew0017]

I don't see how respecting a girl equates to being "creepily devoted" but okay, I guess that's what I am. I'd rather be, as you call it, "creepily" devoted to my girlfriend than be considered an asshole by some people because I'm not respecting her enough. I've noticed I can't win no matter what I say.
Also, what's with the whole lying accusation that keeps coming up? What could I possibly gain by lying? I could understand you saying that if I was lying to seem "cool" and to "fit in" but if that was the case then I'd be going with what the majority is saying, which I'm obviously not. So, your accusation doesn't make sense.
I don't like porn and I think of it as cheating. Get over it.

[Nathan_B]

i don't think it's eye cheating but that's just my opinion....

[Amnesiac]

I don't see how respecting a girl equates to being "creepily devoted" but okay, I guess that's what I am. I'd rather be, as you call it, "creepily" devoted to my girlfriend than be considered an asshole because I'm not respecting her enough. I've noticed I can't win no matter what I say.

I don't see how doing what you want in your free time equates to "respecting" someone. I don't see how abstaining from masturbation can possibly be considered disrespectful. It doesn't make any sense.

Face it, we're only teenagers. These relationships won't last forever, and we shouldn't take them too seriously. You should be having fun with your girlfriend or boyfriend, not molding your daily activities and routines around "respecting" her in your free time, which makes no sense anyway. My third-party opinion in this thread is that anybody who seriously considers looking at porn "cheating" is taking things a little too seriously. Lighten up. Respecting a partner (or any person for that matter) is achieved by talking to them, being nice and spending time with them. It isn't about restraining your own personal matters to conform to some misguided sense of respect.

It's not like you're living together, or will even be in some long-term, infinite relationship that's so perfect. Girlfriends come and go, but the experience of being a teenager doesn't.

[Andrew0017]

I don't see how doing what you want in your free time equates to "respecting" someone. I don't see how abstaining from masturbation can possibly be considered disrespectful. It doesn't make any sense.

Face it, we're only teenagers. These relationships won't last forever, and we shouldn't take them too seriously. You should be having fun with your girlfriend or boyfriend, not molding your daily activities and routines around "respecting" her in your free time, which makes no sense anyway. My third-party opinion in this thread is that anybody who seriously considers looking at porn "cheating" is taking things a little too seriously. Lighten up. Respecting a partner (or any person for that matter) is achieved by talking to them, being nice and spending time with them. It isn't about restraining your own personal matters to conform to some misguided sense of respect.

I understand what you're saying, but I just have no interest in watching porn so there's nothing to "mold." I'm busy with other things in my life, many of them very time consuming, for example: working on cars, playing hockey, attending school, etc. Those are what one could say are my "personal matters." I suppose you could say I take things to seriously, but my girlfriend and I are planning on staying together, and we've been together for a while already (at least compared to most other couples I know) so it is a bit more serious for us than it would be for someone who's part of, say, a three month relationship.
I know you're probably going to say "you don't know for sure that you'll stay together" and all I can say is: okay. That's fine. You don't have to believe me or even take me seriously. But I love her and I want to stay with her.

[Sith Lord 13]

Also, what's with the whole lying accusation that keeps coming up? What could I possibly gain by lying? I could understand you saying that if I was lying to seem "cool" and to "fit in" but if that was the case then I'd be going with what the majority is saying, which I'm obviously not. So, your accusation doesn't make sense.
I don't like porn and I think of it as cheating. Get over it.

Because there are some girls (including your girlfriend apparently) who would find what you're doing romantic. I'm not saying you are lying, but don't act like there isn't a motive for lying here.

Honestly, you're an exceedingly rare statistical anomaly. If I told you I was dating a supermodel, you'd be skeptical. When encountering the highly unlikely, it's natural to be skeptical because often enough it's not true.

[Andrew0017]

Because there are some girls (including your girlfriend apparently) who would find what you're doing romantic. I'm not saying you are lying, but don't act like there isn't a motive for lying here.

Honestly, you're an exceedingly rare statistical anomaly. If I told you I was dating a supermodel, you'd be skeptical. When encountering the highly unlikely, it's natural to be skeptical because often enough it's not true.

Fair enough, I can see how one would think I'm lying. But for the record I'm not doing this for my girlfriend. I'm just stating my opinion. Whether or not she or any other girl finds it romantic is not anything intentional on my part.
I realize many guys watch porn, that's their choice. However, not every guy does and I am a part of the small percentage of those who do not.
Even if for some reason I wanted to watch it...I couldn't, because I have the slowest internet imaginable. I'm at my school right now (1st year of college=endless evening classes with long waits in between), I tried to go onto this site at home...wouldn't even load the page.

[Hockeyfreakk90]

i happen to think it is a form of cheating. you're lusting after someone besides your partner. even if they are just people on a screen, it's still lust. but i don't watch porn anyway. its staged and fake so what's the point?
just my opinion...

[CairAndros]

I understand where you are coming from Andrew. Instead of being accused of lying you should be admired for what you are doing. I know a good few girls who would finish a relationship if they knew their boyfriend was watching porn in his spare time because it would make them feel inferior to what the boyfriend is using as a stimulus. Therefore, I congratulate you and would like to say that I admire what you are doing =]

[Sage]

I've never watched porn in my life, and I have absolutely no interest.

I have an amazing girlfriend, why would I personally want or need to watch porn?

My girlfriend and I have a very exciting, satisfying relationship.

I'm proud to be different.

My "irritating conservative" ways got me into a steady, long lasting relationship with an awesome girl, unlike so many other couples our age

I like to consider myself as being respectful to my girlfriend by not having any interest in viewing porn.

It's sad that more guys aren't like this.

they can't simply be completely satisfied by one person.

Can't speak for other guys, but nothing about it appeals to me.

I don't want any other girls, I only want her.


I'm extremely picky with what I like in girls

there are girls who aren't as bad as some, but I wouldn't call them "attractive." Just not "terrible."

It's an insult to the guys out there like me who truly only love one and are happy that way.

I love her, and she loves me.

She tells me all the time how she loves my unique, loyal personality


I'm sorry I'm different, I guess that's all I can say to you.

I only want one.

Well, I'm not like that and I never have been.


I guess if you guys all consider me strange


I don't care, that's their business.

the ones like me who don't watch porn or that don't really do any of those things, and yes we do exist.

She's my girlfriend,

Nobody has a sense of loyalty anymore...

I'm not "obsessed with masturbating."

Even before I met my girlfriend I was always a bit grossed out by the idea of porn.

I'm a little "old fashioned"

I guess that's what I am.

I'd rather be, as you call it, "creepily" devoted to my girlfriend

I don't like porn and I think of it as cheating. Get over it.

I understand what you're saying, but I just have no interest in watching porn

my girlfriend and I are planning on staying together

we've been together for a while already so it is a bit more serious for us than it would be for someone who's part of, say, a three month relationship.

I love her and I want to stay with her.


I am a part of the small percentage of those who do not.

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_8CgZn7SSp9g/STjHermF-1I/AAAAAAAAAZM/G9kSGOR-hnY/s400/broken+record.jpg

Okay, Andrew. Do you have anything new to share?