My sister from hell.

[Syvelocin]

I just want to communicate a few points about her, as I never, ever, talk about her. This will be long, so kudos for the people who get through it.

Point A: She can turn anything, anything at all, into a spoiled-brat's tantrum
Point B: She is literally, with all due seriousness, the favorite.

Sam is my ten year-old sister (eleven in December). I hate her guts. No, quite literally. Allow me to tell you about an incident a few months+ ago. It was getting late one day, and she hadn't come home yet. She continued to be missing, to the point where my dad actually was searching the neighborhood for her. Opposite to what most might think, this event actually confirmed that I don't have one care in the world for her. Yep, I was actually hoping my dad wouldn't find her. I'd be ecstatic if she died.

Other than my parents, she's the single cause for my discontent, unhappiness, and overall dislike of my family. She has more attitude than any teenager I've met. She's cold, heartless, ignorant, stupid, selfish, explosive, snotty, envious, mean, friendless, spoiled, bratty, and "perfect." She's the blond soccer player. The egotistical perfectionist. Athletic, likes books, a Christian, good grades. All in this small, disgusting, unbelievable package.

Point A: She can turn anything, anything at all, into a spoiled-brat's tantrum. I'm not even talking about not getting her way, which she does get upset about anyway. No matter what it is, even if it is the single-most flawless situation in the world, she will make a scene out of it, complain about it, and refuse to let anyone help.

My only thing, is that everytime she cries, I have this desire to show her what REAL pain is like. What REAL emotion feels like. What self-harm, bipolar disorder, multiple personality, eating disorders, being the ignored child, hated by your parents, facing verbal abuse everyday, feels like. Not some stupid, unimportant shit that gets you attention for five seconds. She wouldn't survive a minute in my shoes. And don't give me the "well, she's young" excuse. Ten, almost eleven, is not young. I stopped crying when I was six. I taught myself how to behave when I was in elementary school, because my parents failed at raising me. I understood my mother's mental state and suicidal tendencies when I was eight. I thought for myself when I was nine. I suffered from depression at her age. I started hurting myself when I was twelve. All the while, I always put my loved ones before me. Maybe I was just an intelligent child. Sure, yeah, that's possible. But my parents raised me just like they did her. But I wasn't so fucking stupid to believe every word they said.

Her way is the only way in my house. She'll get upset because you're watching tv, she'll get upset because you are having fun, she'll get upset because you're talking to someone, she'll get upset because you're feeding the cats. And what she says, goes.

Point B: She is literally, with all due seriousness, the favorite. Oh no, this isn't some kind of perception thing. I've expressed it to my parents, but they disagree.

-Sam has two rooms. Self-explanatory.
-She can have any pet she wants, at any time. (guinea pig, hamster, gerbil, turtle, cat, rat). I have a cat, that's all I've ever had, and I am denied even a goldfish.
-No matter the importance of something I need, or an errand, anything she WANTS comes first. She wants to get books at the book store. I need something for school. She gets to go to the book store, and I get yelled at by my teacher. I asked for some steri-strips, because my arm was bleeding out, her homework came first, and I needed to go to the hospital.
-She's Christian, and I'm the exact opposite. My mother hates me for not being Christian. She's also everything my parents wanted in a child but didn't get with me.
-She's taken on routine trips to wherever she wants. Six Flags, Disneyland, Chicago. I've been allowed to go with to Six Flags once of one thousand opportunities.
-When my birthday comes around, or Christmas, I'm told that we don't have the money for presents, so I accept a CD and a pair of socks. Come her birthday, she gets everything on her wishlist, toys, a new computer, maybe some room furniture, a cat. Her birthday's in December, and I still get the socks for Christmas.
-Everything that comes out of my parents' mouths about her, is positive. About 75% of what comes out of my parents' mouths about me, is shit like "bitch," "selfish," "ungrateful," "devil child." I'd like to know who the person impersonating me for 15 years is if they think these things about me, cause, might just be my perception, but as far as my social life, I'm known as one of the nicest and selfless people my outer family and friends know.

We're far beyond therapy. My sister won't even try. She desires a relationship with me apparently, though kicking me in the face, dominating me, scoffing at my mental disorders, and overall treating me like the little sister, is a funny way to get people to like you.

I also want to know, how this stupid, childish, brat can be a blood relative of me? She's not smart, logical, intelligent, or rational like my dad and I. She isn't depressed, mentally unstable, or laid-back like my mother (and I). It's difficult to believe we got our blood from the same people. She's worse than every teenager who has a similar personality put together, and that's saying something.

Thank you for withstanding my rant.

[Quick_Sylver]

I understand all of this completely. :hug3: Im around if you need to talk.

[Vonn]

Read the whole thing, and damn if that doesn't suck. Hard to believe she's only ten and can be described in so many negative adjectives. Good for you for telling it like it is.

Hopefully, nobody will bring up the "you have to love your family" BS. Your sister sounds like a real piece of work.

[Clawhammer]

I read the whole thing. I can only say that I hope they realize what they're being like. There's some people that call themselves Christians, but aren't. If they were, they'd be loving and caring and want to help you. They apparently fall far short of all of this. As I don't know all the details, I'm not sure how much help can be offered, but my best thought is this: try to help them realize what you're going through and what they are being. It's hard, and I have no idea how one could go about it, but I wish you the best of luck, and give my sympathies.

[Syvelocin]

It's quite unbelievable, actually. Your sister. Sisters can be that bad? :( I bet a lot of it's in how your parents raised her. All those factors have an affect on a kid's personality and attitude. More discipline, less discipline. More structure, less structure. More responsibility, less responsibility. My brother and sister, though I usually despise the heck out of younger kids, are the cutest darlings in the world. Though, you know, they're seven and three. But my mother definitely has better parenting skills than what I'm hearing about your parents :/

And then not everyone can be born intelligent dearie. You were, and you were smart enough to pick yourself up from how your parents raised you. She doesn't seem quite independent enough to be able to do anything but rely on her parents. But I guess, independence is something you need in this situation, huh? Both of us had that need to be independent, to be our own support system, security blanket, and even our own parents.

I think I'd definitely be a little different if I had lived with my mum for my entire childhood. I don't know if I'd be more or less grateful, more or less independent. But I can see what you have gone through, and what I have gone through, just events in our past that wove together to make us who we are. We created our own coping mechanisms to fix the holes in ourselves.

How much can you do about Sam? Not a lot. Give her a few years though. Jay's got this younger sister about her age. She throws the most insane tantrums, and I've witnessed a lot of them. Maybe not a few years, give her till she's out of college. Maybe thirty years old. She'll wake up from this probably. Now, about your dislike of her, that we can't change. But since you're the older one, you have every right to not like her. I bet when you were a kid, and she was born, you were excited. Though you probably started to hate her when she learned to talk is my guess =P

Just want to ask, is there any possibility that she either has anger management problems, or maybe she'll end up with one of your mother's mental disorders. I know it would be horrible for you, if she were to have one too. But it's a possibility. What were you like as a kid, for comparison?