galigator8509
September 10th, 2010, 08:39 AM
If you really knew me: you would know that my past still haunts me, and there are secrets that a lot of people dont know.
If you really knew me: you would know that my life isnt as nice as it seems.
If you really knew me: you would know that I might come off as though im really confident, but in reality im extremely insecure.
If you really knew me: you would know that when I was in elementary and middle school the boys used to call me "heifer", and now I have a huge fear of gaining weight. You would know that I think about my weight everyday, and even though in most peoples eyes im skinny, I still think im fat, and need to drop some pounds.
If you really knew me: you would know that after he took advantage of me, my life has never been the same. You would know that it takes a lot for me to trust, and im afraid of it happening again.
If you really knew me: you would know that the huge random scars on my legs, arent from what I say there from. You would know that most of the marks on my body have been self inflicted, and you would know that I have struggled with self harm for over five years.
If you really knew me: you would know that my mom, isnt the nice person everyone makes her out to be. You would know that she puts on a front, to make her seem like shes a good person, and you would know that ive had to deal with both emotional, and physical abuse from her on more than one occasion.
If you really knew me: you would know that I lost all my friends from high school, and now I barely talk to anyone.
If you really knew me: you would know that even though you might not notice, I suffer from a bad case of OCD. You would know that it affects my everyday activities, and makes things a lot more difficult to accomplish.
If you really knew me: you would know that I am not as strong as I may come off. You would know that im actually a very sensitive, and emotional person. And you would know that, even the littlest comment could put me down.
If you really knew me: you would know that im not a goodie two shoes like people may think.
If you really knew me: you would know that even though I might look okay, I used to have a sucide plan to how I would end my life. You would know that I wanted to crash my car, at high speed, into a stationary object. And you would know that everyday I was afraid to even drive to school because I wasnt sure if I would ever make it.
If you really knew me: You would know that I am dealing with a virual disease, which happens to be HPV. You would know that I want to help others become aware of this disease, and help prevent them from getting it, but im afraid to tell people. And you would know that I feel people will judge me, and think im a disgusting person, because I have a STD.
If you really knew me: You would know that even though I say im glad to be graduated from high school, I secretly miss it. You would know, that all four years the only two people I had that truely pulled me through were my math teacher, and my guidance counselor. And you would know, that I miss the relationships I had with them, that were so dear to my heart.
If you really knew me: you would know that you really have no idea who the real me is.
AND if you really knew me: you would know that this is only the beginning, to an endless amount of issues.
If you really knew me: you would know that my life isnt as nice as it seems.
If you really knew me: you would know that I might come off as though im really confident, but in reality im extremely insecure.
If you really knew me: you would know that when I was in elementary and middle school the boys used to call me "heifer", and now I have a huge fear of gaining weight. You would know that I think about my weight everyday, and even though in most peoples eyes im skinny, I still think im fat, and need to drop some pounds.
If you really knew me: you would know that after he took advantage of me, my life has never been the same. You would know that it takes a lot for me to trust, and im afraid of it happening again.
If you really knew me: you would know that the huge random scars on my legs, arent from what I say there from. You would know that most of the marks on my body have been self inflicted, and you would know that I have struggled with self harm for over five years.
If you really knew me: you would know that my mom, isnt the nice person everyone makes her out to be. You would know that she puts on a front, to make her seem like shes a good person, and you would know that ive had to deal with both emotional, and physical abuse from her on more than one occasion.
If you really knew me: you would know that I lost all my friends from high school, and now I barely talk to anyone.
If you really knew me: you would know that even though you might not notice, I suffer from a bad case of OCD. You would know that it affects my everyday activities, and makes things a lot more difficult to accomplish.
If you really knew me: you would know that I am not as strong as I may come off. You would know that im actually a very sensitive, and emotional person. And you would know that, even the littlest comment could put me down.
If you really knew me: you would know that im not a goodie two shoes like people may think.
If you really knew me: you would know that even though I might look okay, I used to have a sucide plan to how I would end my life. You would know that I wanted to crash my car, at high speed, into a stationary object. And you would know that everyday I was afraid to even drive to school because I wasnt sure if I would ever make it.
If you really knew me: You would know that I am dealing with a virual disease, which happens to be HPV. You would know that I want to help others become aware of this disease, and help prevent them from getting it, but im afraid to tell people. And you would know that I feel people will judge me, and think im a disgusting person, because I have a STD.
If you really knew me: You would know that even though I say im glad to be graduated from high school, I secretly miss it. You would know, that all four years the only two people I had that truely pulled me through were my math teacher, and my guidance counselor. And you would know, that I miss the relationships I had with them, that were so dear to my heart.
If you really knew me: you would know that you really have no idea who the real me is.
AND if you really knew me: you would know that this is only the beginning, to an endless amount of issues.