My Aunt & Uncle Hate Me.

[galigator8509]

Back in December, of 2007, on the 23rd my uncle sexually assaulted me.

He and I used to have a really close relationship, I could talk to him about anything and everything, and I felt comfortable doing so. We would always joke around with each other, and I was at my Aunt & Uncles house just about every weekend.

Now that I think about it though, maybe the conversations, and questions he used to ask me werent so innocent? He used to ask me what me and my "boyfriends" would do, and stuff like that. And he would sometimes comment about how I look, and everytime before I would leave he would give me a hug, but maybe it wasnt innocent like I had though for him?

Anyway, after it happened, he came in to his sons bedroom, which is where I was, and his exact words were "Did I do something wrong babe?" I told my friend, whos dad is a cop, and they told my parents, who in return called me, and came to pick me up, because I was suppose to be spending the night.

Well, I was interviewed, and spoke to the cops, but nothing really came of it, because I waited over a year to tell someone, who helped me get to the police.

My parents didnt believe me, and my aunt kept telling everyone I was lying, and just trying to start drama, so everyone was blaming me.

Well, its now 2010, almost three years later, and is it normal that I MISS my uncle?

Missing my uncle makes me wish I never told anyone, that way things could still be normal, and I could still see my cousins, and my aunt wouldnt hate me. I miss him, and wish that things were like they had been before all this happened.

And I really want to reach out to them, and talk to him, and see what it would be like now, or what he thinks of everything.. but im pretty sure they all want nothing to do with me, but how do I stop missing him?

I know I probably shouldnt miss him, but I really really do.

[Asylum]

there are times in which i miss my neighbors. my neighbors sexually harassed me... we used to play star wars in the back yard, after the abuse started eveyrting changed. i hated them, i was hurt, angry, but i still wished that never happened because htye were my onlyfriends at the time. so i understand that yo miss them... to stop missing htem concentrate on the bad. however i wouldn't do that, i would jsut forget the situation entirely... and perhaps talking about it wiht osmeone.

i'm sorry i wasn't much help...

[DarkHorses]

Hey there. :)

First, I'm really sorry about what happened to you. I know that must have been so difficult for you to deal with, especially since you kept it a secret for so long. I think you did a good thing in reaching out and telling someone, even if the reaction of your family wasn't the best one.

It sounds like the relationship you had with your uncle before all of this happened was one that you enjoyed having, even if it was a bit of a borderline inappropriate one. I think that when you say you miss your uncle, the conversations you used to have with him and the person he was before he did this to you is the person that you miss. You looked up to him, and saw him as a good person. That's the person you miss. You don't miss who he really is.

I think that you should try to find someone that you can count on like you counted on your uncle when you would spend time with him like you did. Someone who you can talk to about everything you want or need to. That might fill the hole in your life that's causing you to miss your uncle.

I really don't think it's a good idea for you to get back in contact with your uncle. For so long you believed he was a good person, but once he took advantage of you he proved that he wasn't. You need to think of your uncle as who he is - someone who would sexually abuse an innocent family member - instead of the person you thought he was for so long. That's not to say you shouldn't forgive him. You definitely should try to do that. But at the same time, you shouldn't forget what he did to you.

You deserve people in your life who you can count on, but who won't do this to you. They're definitely out there, you just have to find them. Good luck with everything. x

[disassociation2016]

Personally I think that this behavior from someone you expect to act kind towards you is unacceptable. My aunt has recently acted out of proper conduct towards me and I promptly told my dad, and asked her not to speak to me, call me, or text me again. Problem solved I also told her husband who I'm sure let her know that she should refrain from contacting me anymore.