I fucked up....

[Ender]

Okay... so.. Theres this guy i've always secretly considered cute, and he recently came out to me as bi-curious, and told me he liked me... Him and I were getting pretty into it. He made me promise not to tell anyone about him.

Well, my best friend (basically my brother), noticed that i was acting happier than usual, and began asking why. Well, It's become impossible for me to lie to him, so I told him.
After thinking about it awhile, i decided that if im going to have a relationship that i dont want there to be any secrets between us, so I told him that I told my friend, thinking he would understand. He lost it and went ape shit on me. Now he wont talk to me, or reply to my facebook messages, except for the occassional "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!! I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!!". Ugh, I wish I hadnt told him.

What do I do? I mean, he was a good friend... I really dont want to lose him.

[scuba steve]

"leave me the fuck alone... I fucking hate you..." Right, sounds like you should back off a bit, leave him to fight with himself for a week or so. But your going to need to talk to him in person, no more messages until you know things are sorted out or at least on speaking terms... That's all I can really offer, as long as you outline that your other mate wont tell and make sure he wont i don't think there should be much of a problem.

[Ender]

"leave me the fuck alone... I fucking hate you..." Right, sounds like you should back off a bit, leave him to fight with himself for a week or so. But your going to need to talk to him in person, no more messages until you know things are sorted out or at least on speaking terms... That's all I can really offer, as long as you outline that your other mate wont tell and make sure he wont i don't think there should be much of a problem.
Thats one of the first things i said when I told him. Brandon (the guy) knows Nick (my best friend), and he knows that Nick 1. doesnt give a fuck what you are and 2. wouldnt tell a sole. He is a really good friend.
And problem, I rarely see Brandon in person, he goes to a different school, and we only hung out when one of us invited the other over. Nick however, has him in two or three classes. (the lucky devils)

[scuba steve]

Thats one of the first things i said when I told him. Brandon (the guy) knows Nick (my best friend), and he knows that Nick 1. doesnt give a fuck what you are and 2. wouldnt tell a sole. He is a really good friend.
And problem, I rarely see Brandon in person, he goes to a different school, and we only hung out when one of us invited the other over. Nick however, has him in two or three classes. (the lucky devils)

Possibly get Nick to try and talk to him, he'll say he's cool with it, wont tell anyone etc just to re-assure him. Or since it's a person and can't ignore him like messages ask him to set up a day when the two of you can meet up?

[Scarface]

Okay... so.. Theres this guy i've always secretly considered cute, and he recently came out to me as bi-curious, and told me he liked me... Him and I were getting pretty into it. He made me promise not to tell anyone about him.

Well, my best friend (basically my brother), noticed that i was acting happier than usual, and began asking why. Well, It's become impossible for me to lie to him, so I told him.
After thinking about it awhile, i decided that if im going to have a relationship that i dont want there to be any secrets between us, so I told him that I told my friend, thinking he would understand. He lost it and went ape shit on me. Now he wont talk to me, or reply to my facebook messages, except for the occassional "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!! I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!!". Ugh, I wish I hadnt told him.

What do I do? I mean, he was a good friend... I really dont want to lose him.

Well I know how hard it can be to not be honest especially someone close to you. Some things are meant to be kept secrets however. When it comes to sexuality especially when first coming out to someone. He felt he could trust you with it. Which is a pretty big thing.

I'm sure he doesn't feel very great at the moment so it might be best just to give him some breathing room. People when first coming out don't want a lot of people to know because they don't know how people will take it and the absolute fear of rejection. Though he is your best friend it just shouldn't have been said, and I don't mean to pour salt on an open wound.

Just give him some time alone that way things can cool down. Then maybe try and talk to him once again and work all of this out. Explain the situation and how you felt and that you in now way meant for him to be upset. Just tell him what you told us, "That you feel it was impossible to lie" you didn't mean it.

I really hope things work out for you Trae, this is kind of like a lesson with secrets, some are just not meant to be told. If you ever need someone to talk to I'm always here, PM/VM anytime. :hug3:

[Ender]

Thanks guys... I guess ill wait a week and try and tlk to him :/ .

More advice is still welcome.

[Demented]

He isn't worth it, If he wants to keep your relationship a secret then he must not care about you that much. Or, he is embarrassed?

[justalovestruckteen]

I would understand if he wants to keep it a secret because his family doesn't allow it or something,

I think you should stay away for a few weeks than talk to him about it,

[Wetherbubble]

Let him cool off a bit

[Ender]

him and i were just texting, hes still really pissed. It was going okay for a few minutes, but then he got pissed again, and now isnt talking to me, again.

[justalovestruckteen]

If he truly love you, he'll come back

[wtblife]

I think he'll get over it and I know exactly what you mean, I've made the same sort of mistake more than once :-\

[Ender]

Thanks for all of the help guys :) I really hope things turn up over the next few weeks.

[htmlrulezd00d]

if he were really a good friend and really liked you, he shouldn't want to keep it a secret.
imo, forget him.

[Ender]

It all worked out guys. Thanks for all of your help. :D