not sure what to do

[some guy123]

her guys, im new here but i need some advice.

anyways, there is this girl i lived a few dorm rooms down from in college. we became friends but not really that great of friends. i wasnt really sure how i felt about her but as the year was coming to a close we started flirting and spending way more time with each other. she was always asking me to go do little things with her or come with her when she went to do things.

however, we didnt really text or talk on the phone that much, since we lived so close. everything usually happened kind of just because i was there. like i would just be walking past her room and she would stop me and ask me to go some place with her or something. unfortunately, the school year ended and we went our seperate ways, still friends of course.

so over the summer i didnt really speak to her too much, but i did post something on her facebook one day just saying hi and asking how shes doing and such. and she seemed really excited to hear from me and she asked when i was coming to visit her and such. so, we talked a little bit and i planned a trip to her house.

so i drove up to her house, which is really far from me, planning on staying 1 night. and basically, it wasnt what i had hoped. we didnt really flirt much at all or spend much time together alone like i wanted to. she had other friends over and we had a little party with her friends, with none of whom i know. i dont know, it just wasnt what i hoped it would be.

so now, we are going back to school in a couple weeks but she lives in a different dorm from me entirely, so now im worried we wont spend as much time together and our friendship will like slowly diminish. however, she might realize that since we dont live together anymore that now we would need to start texting and calling each other a lot more in order to continue seeing each other.

i just dont know how this girl really feels about me. i mean she flirts with me and there are a lot of signs she does like me, but then other times it seems like she doesnt... i dont know im just confused. i really want to tell her i like her but i dont know if its too soon, and maybe i should wait and see how things go... i really love spending time with her but sometimes i just dont know if i have a chance with her... i certainly dont want to lose her but i dont want to seem clingy. and now, i have to worry about her hitting it off with the new guys in her dorm. ughhhh...

im sorry for the rant, but does anybody have any advice for me?

[justalovestruckteen]

I think you should tell her,

[Andrew.6]

tel her how you really fell if nothing works out you can still be friends

[thiscityisdead]

First off welcome to VT and bro you definitely need to take her out to dinner ( a fancy one i might add ) and just be yourself. talk a bit about life and what you wanna do after college and hopefully you guys just hit it off

First and foremost you gotta have confidence in yourself, no one can do this for you and you might be confused on her actions but maybe she wanted to spend time with you and her friends.

Next time she asks to go somewhere to bare through it and go with her, like you said she asks alot so hit her up on one of her offers and hope to have fun on whatever adventure she brings you on

I wish you the best of luck bro,
Remember confidence is key x]

[some guy123]

thanks a lot guys, i really appreciate it. yea, like the last week of last school year we really spent a ton of time together and we always had a lot of fun. even just doing little stupid shit, we had a lot of fun together.

at the end of last semester i felt on top of the world lol but after i went to see her over the summer i just dont know anymore. she really wanted me to come visit her, but when i actually did she didnt really pay much attention to me. we hung out with a few of her friends and stuff, and i didnt know anybody so it kind of sucked. i was hoping to spend a lot of alone time with her and build our relationship even more, but i barely even spent a few moments alone with her. it didnt help at all that i didnt know anybody cuz im pretty shy at first. but when its just me and her, we have a blast together.

i mean we used to flirt and we would like play wrestle with each other and she always loved it. she seemed to act differently with me than she did the other guys. one night she was a little drunk and was all over me when she came back to the dorm. everything seemed like she liked me. she always like stared into my eyes when we talked and things... you know, little subtle signs like that. but now im just not sure.

listen, i really appreciate you guys taking the time to listen and try to help.

and thecityisdead, thanks for the advice. much appreciated. yea, i really hope she still wants to spend a lot of time together and still asks me to chill with her even though we wont be living in the same dorm together. if things kind of like carry over from last semester, then i will definitely tell her how i feel. i just need to hope she still wants to spend time together.

like i said earlier, we used to hang out a lot because we lived 2 doors down from each other so we were always right near each other so if i happened to walk by she would stop me and ask me to go somewhere with her and i always would. but now, living in completely different buildings i dont know if things will still be the same....

once again, i really appreciate the responses everyone.

[thiscityisdead]

If you like her as much as you say you do then you need to find the time for her and you need to call her and make plans with her not only vice versa it may be hard now living in separate buildings but you gotta just find the right moments to spend together and hopefully like you said you get that chance with her cuz tbh I think you deserve it I mean you seem like a pretty Down to earth guy about these girl problems but just keep your head held high and aim for the best.

I've learned that you gotta be the one dedicated to the relationship as much as the partner should be this is a mutual thing after all, if it carries on to next semester (which it will) that twinkle in her eye is usually something special. I'd keep in touch and see how it goes from there.
Once again good luck bro.

[some guy123]

yea thanks man. i'll definitely make sure to keep on stepping up and asking her to do things, not just wait for her to ask me. you have no idea how much you're helping me out man, thanks a ton. i really needed to get all this off my chest and talk to somebody about it, so i really appreciate you listening.

[thiscityisdead]

yea thanks man. i'll definitely make sure to keep on stepping up and asking her to do things, not just wait for her to ask me. you have no idea how much you're helping me out man, thanks a ton. i really needed to get all this off my chest and talk to somebody about it, so i really appreciate you listening.


The whole point you posted right? To get something off your chest and just talk to someone. The reason I found this site so helpful and informative and you've only recently discovered the people on this site. They can be very helpful for no matter what problem you have so keep posting and dude I'm always here to help.
Peace bro.

[DanielBoy]

I find girls are flirts, they don't always mean it. It seems like you two are just friends, so you might just want to talk to her, and ask if there is more there. And if now, you need to tell her you want to keep spending time together, and I'm sure if she considers you a friend, she will. I don't think that your friendship will diminish that much. Good luck bro. :P