My mum knows and now i've ruined everything

[xgeekyrocksx]

My Nan who found out about my cutting made me tell my mum. And when i told her she cried. Thats when i realised what a stupid little cow i was and how mean and spiteful i had been. Its not like my mum is a bad mum. I love her loads. And just the fact that i hurt her by doing it makes me all the more sick. And my dad... he saw cuts on my arm when they were still new, not scars. and he made me promise not to ever do it again and the thing is... i did. about a week or so later i cut again and i feel like i took advantage of both of them. I hate myself for doing this and now..im never ever gonna cut again. But i dont think its that simple....
and now i cant make the scars go away. and my mum thinks im trying to do it to be COOL. to be EMO.
i just can't fight back any more.... im a lier and a cow and i hate myself for ever cutting. i made my parents sad and hate me. thats all..

[laurita_21]

They don't hate you trust me!! She cried because i mean what mum wouldn't?

Don't hate yourself for it ok, Explain to them how it can be addictive and that you want to stop but your gonna need their help to do that :)
good luck !

[Cloud]

My Nan who found out about my cutting made me tell my mum. And when i told her she cried.
She cried because she cares
youve got a advantage now, youve got a mother who cares and will help you
Thats when i realised what a stupid little cow i was and how mean and spiteful i had been.
why? by dealing with problems?
if you keep thinking like that youll just end up circling around and ending up worse than you are now
Its not like my mum is a bad mum. I love her loads. And just the fact that i hurt her by doing it makes me all the more sick.
sooooo make sure you dont cut anymore for your mums sake
And my dad... he saw cuts on my arm when they were still new, not scars. and he made me promise not to ever do it again and the thing is... i did. about a week or so later i cut again and i feel like i took advantage of both of them.
since its not easy to stop
it takes alot and you cant expect yourself to stop imediately
I hate myself for doing this and now..im never ever gonna cut again. But i dont think its that simple....
its not simple but now youve got your mum and dadd who know and who can help you when your feeling like you need to cut so tthat you dont end up cutting

and now i cant make the scars go away. and my mum thinks im trying to do it to be COOL. to be EMO.
well make sure she knows its not because of that
i just can't fight back any more.... im a lier and a cow and i hate myself for ever cutting. i made my parents sad and hate me. thats all..
how do you know they hate you
or do you just think they do

[Mike321]

Don't take it out on yourself, or hate yourself.
Your nan probably told your mom becuase she cares and is worried about you
Its more than likley your mom cried becuase she cares and doesnt want you to hurt yourself.
Your are by no means stupid, mean or spiteful, I think you need to explain to her why you have been doing it, how you feel (I know this is not an easy thing to do), but this way she can help you and understand it more.
Chances are they dont hate you, they want to be there for you and support you, like we do.
Seriously dont take it out on yourself, its important to talk to her about it.
As you know, you can PM me anytime if you need to talk

[Wish]

Often, people don't show you that they care until the very riskiest and painful of experiences. This must be what kind of happened here. Your Mum found out about self-harm and cried. That is not because you are a horrible little cow or any of those things you say or believe about yourself, it is because she cares a great deal about you which, on the contrary, means you must be someone with many positive attributes. It is 'easy' to blame ourselves in order to get out of a mess, but we have to look objectively on the situation.

I don't know the reason you self-harm but it perhaps now is the time to tell your Mum. Just because you hurt yourself doesn't mean your Mum is a 'bad' Mum, just that you've had some difficult times (that might not have been to do with her). Maybe you could think about writing her a letter and explaining why it is you hurt yourself. It sounds as if she wants to, or will want to help you when she can.

It is the foundation of recovery, to have a solid support network around you and it is great that you are well on your way to finding that.

[xgeekyrocksx]

thank you to all of you, i dont know.. mum just wont get it will she.
and dad, im scared to look at him now caus i bet he's so dissapointed in me
and yeah, it has nothing to do with them. i'll just say i wanted to be cool. whatever. anything else will make them angry

[Cloud]

thank you to all of you, i dont know.. mum just wont get it will she.
well explain it well to her

and dad, im scared to look at him now caus i bet he's so dissapointed in me
key words you say there are I BET, you dont know he will
your just assuming the worst that he will

and yeah, it has nothing to do with them. i'll just say i wanted to be cool.
Oh but it is something, something pretty dam serious
you cant just pass it off as that
thatll make your parents even more dissapointed if they already are since there thinking your doing it for a pathetic reason like that
explain to them why your doing it properly,

whatever. anything else will make them angry
telling them that would make them even angrier

[HeroesAndCons]

<3 u aint bad u just needed a release kust like all of us did or does dont be so hard on urself

[xgeekyrocksx]

hmm maybe thats right. and i will talk to them. Its true isnt it. if you dont do your best to help yourself, then nothing anyone else does is gonna work. If that really makes sense...

[DarkHorses]

Polina,

Your parents definitely don't hate you. It sounds like they're really concerned about you, and it hurts them that you would want to hurt yourself, because they love you and they don't want you to suffer. No parent wants to see their child in pain, and a lot of times it's hard for them to comprehend why they would ever want to hurt themselves intentionally.

I think you should sit down and talk to your mom about your self harm. Share with her your reasons for self harming, and try to make her understand why you hurt yourself. She may not be completely understanding, seeing as she's never dealt with this herself, but she will at least realize that you're not doing this to "be cool."

I also think you should consider getting professional help for the problems you're struggling with that are causing you to hurt yourself. Self harm is a hard habit to give up, but with professional help and people there to support you through this it becomes all the easier.

Believe in yourself, you're perfectly capable of living a life without self harm.