Gayness with Girlyness?

[TheFame]

I always wondered if being gay makes you more girly.

Like I always thought that the gay men chose to be girly because they dont realate to men but more to women.

I feel bi, but i could be gay, but when i was little i was really girly.

So that really made me think if gay guys are born with their feminin ways.

I also want to add in that im talking about the MAJORITY of gay guys. I know there are some manly gay guys out there who you think are straight.

[Captor K]

I always wondered if being gay makes you more girly.

Not at all. I know gay guys who are so masculine you wouldn't dream they would ever be gay. In fact, most guys, myself included, are able to hide in the closet so well by "acting straight."

Like I always thought that the gay men chose to be girly because they dont realate to men but more to women.

Some gay guys are effeminate yes - the flamers make up a minority of the gay community - but the effeminacy is just a part of their nature. They don't, as far as I know, willingly choose to act "girly." I certainly don't act girly, but I do have my effeminate moments. I can relate to men better than women, but strangely enough, I would say gay guys in general can stand neutrally on both sides of gender. I know how men, think, act, what they want, and how to please them. Yet, because I am a writer, I can identify with women pretty strongly as well; I am able to understand their emotions, their desires, and I play therapist for most them (I am good for venting to apparently).

Whenever a girlfriend of mine is having boy trouble, she can express her frustration to me, and I can communicate easily to her, understanding her point of view while trying to explain what the guy might be thinking/feeling as well. It seems for straight couples, guys have a hard time understanding women, and women have a hard time understanding men. I have heard on more than one account on how gays have intervened and saved relationships from crumbling, simply because the gay guy seems to have a natural understanding of both sexes. Weird.

I feel bi, but i could be gay, but when i was little i was really girly.

Are you sure you aren't in denial? If you're uncertain, don't feel pressured to label yourself right now. Give it time. Time tells all.

So that really made me think if gay guys are born with their feminin ways.

Can't really say if they are "born" with those ways or not, but it IS a part of who they are. I basically fail at trying to act feminine because I was raised by hardcore machos; yet, I'm not all that macho (except sometimes), nor am I that feminine, but rather, I seem to hang between a delicate balance.

I also want to add in that im talking about the MAJORITY of gay guys. I know there are some manly gay guys out there who you think are straight.

Not a majority, but a minority as mentioned before.. It seems like there are more flaming gays because they're the ones who get the most attention, from the media and in general. If more gay men came out, you'd be astounded at the number of them who are masculine. I'm willing to bet you know more manly gays than feminine ones.

[TheFame]

Once again, amazing answer!

You should be a mod

[The Flightless Hawk]

Captor K had the perfect answer, i agree with him totally.

[Andrzej]

I doubt that people are "born feminine", it has more to do with their environment and nurturing.

I'm about as gay as a dude can get, but I'm not even close to being feminine/girly. Not that there's anything wrong with being a feminine man.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

<.<
I'm pretty feminine
...
rather I act feminine, I don't LOOK very feminine, but I act it xD
...
I wish I was a femboi

[Billy15]

Adam, I think you might be right about gay guys relating more with girls (just speaking for myself) because three of my best friends are girls and I am gay. I have lots of male friends to but girls are just more emotional, sensitive, in tune with their feelings and guys always seem as though they have to prove something, act macho, become jocks,
beat up on little kids and I don't relate to that at all. I am small for my age, skinny, care about how I look (like clothes, bathing, keeping my hair net lol) but I don't think I act girly either. So for me anyways, I relate more to the emotional side, dreaming about being in love, trying to be myself, following my heart rather then my mind and to be honest, IDK if that's a gay thing or not.

[Felix Felicis]

I'm gay and I've always been rather effeminate. I was reading an article the other day saying that some gay men act girly just to conform to stereotypes. I couldn't disagree more. I've acted very girly and had almost only girls as friends since as long as I can remember, going back to kindergarden I think. Knowing that I was gay didn't change how I acted. I'm not saying that all or even the majority of gay guys are effeminate. I think that there being a higher percentage of girly gay guys than girly straight guys is something that just has to do with being gay.

[DarkHorses]

I think that it depends completely on the person. I think that with some gay guys, being gay definitely makes them more feminine. But others are still totally masculine, and you'd never even guess that they're gay. So I think every gay person is different. Just because you're gay doesn't mean you're girly, but it doesn't always mean you're not either.

[Dorsum Oppel]

I don't relate with women.

I don't even like women that much.