To Stay or To Go???

[Fruit_Tart.]

i hope this is the right place to put this, and if not please move. :) thanks.

okay. here i go. i love my friends and family ALOT! i have lots of close friends and my family is really lovable and all that good stuff, BUT the current place i live in is not a stable place for a homo-guy to live in. homo's are a no no where ever my family lives because we live in a reservation (native american placement community). sure there are some people that will accept me but majority or most people will not. my family all over is completely homophobic. i really consider living my life as a "gay" and will want to raise a family and live with my lover. i don't know if many people here will accept that and that's where my question comes in...

do you think i should stay and live my future here at home where my family and friends are to love and care for me BUT won't accept me for who i am?

OR

do you suggest i go elsewhere when im done with school and start and live a new and stable life for myself and my family? (god i sound selfish. o.o)

i really appreciate any help/advice anyone gives me and would really like for you to expand on your guy's answers. :) thanks for your time. ~RaINBoWKiD (AKA- HaPPyEmO)

[erik1993]

I really can't answer this for you. It really comes down to one thing: Do you want to leave the people that you have grown up with for your entire life.... or leave? Even if your family does not approve they should still support you no matter what decision you decide to take in life.

But as I said, it is really your choice. I think that me nor anyone else on this site should tell you what makes your feel happy.

[thiscityisdead]

I really can't answer this for you. It really comes down to one thing: Do you want to leave the people that you have grown up with for your entire life.... or leave? Even if your family does not approve they should still support you no matter what decision you decide to take in life.

But as I said, it is really your choice. I think that me nor anyone else on this site should tell you what makes your feel happy.

^^^^ couldn't have said it better and who says that your completely stable after school you can't predict the future and it can be alot harder to move out on your own then you think it is. This is a huge responsibility And should be thought out carefully before the final decision.

I say stay home and hopefully they learn that everybody is different and not perfect.

[1_21Guns]

if they love and care, they accept you for who you are. you have a lifetime ahead of you to settle down elsewhere and raise a family, cross that bridge when you get there. it's pointless chucking yourself in at the deep end too early.

but as above, ultimately it's your own choice, you know what's best for you etc and nobody else can tell you that.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

:p
It's normally natural for a child to leave their parents/immediate family when they finish school.
It seems to normal to me....

[Fruit_Tart.]

^^^^ couldn't have said it better and who says that your completely stable after school you can't predict the future and it can be alot harder to move out on your own then you think it is. This is a huge responsibility And should be thought out carefully before the final decision.

I say stay home and hopefully they learn that everybody is different and not perfect.
yeah. but that's why im planning out my life. i know that it possibly won't happen but i can hope for it. and my family, well some of em won't ever learn to accept anyone that they already dislike. example A: my dad. and i don't ever want to disappoint him in anything like this especially when he specifically told me not to do anything like "them" meaning gays.

but i do appreciate your help and it will give me something to think about. :)
:p
It's normally natural for a child to leave their parents/immediate family when they finish school.
It seems to normal to me....
:D i like you. :) yeah i do to. ^_^
if they love and care, they accept you for who you are. you have a lifetime ahead of you to settle down elsewhere and raise a family, cross that bridge when you get there. it's pointless chucking yourself in at the deep end too early.

but as above, ultimately it's your own choice, you know what's best for you etc and nobody else can tell you that.
ha. hun. i was speaking of after college. i wanna move out after college cuz where will i be without my parents to get me that far??? in the dumps? lol. :) sorry just trying to lighten the mood. but thanks hun. you actually made me smile. lol. :D
I really can't answer this for you. It really comes down to one thing: Do you want to leave the people that you have grown up with for your entire life.... or leave? Even if your family does not approve they should still support you no matter what decision you decide to take in life.

But as I said, it is really your choice. I think that me nor anyone else on this site should tell you what makes your feel happy.
yeah but my parent's lifestyle and opinions are wayy different when it comes to sexuality. they think it's disgusting and really nasty and they don't want a son of theirs to be like those fags or homos or queers or whatever name they will throw at me. :/

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

:p
You said you live on a reservation, is that the only reason you wanted to stay?

[Fruit_Tart.]

no. its the only reason i want to go. the lifestyle of the older people is way different from the newer generation and i dont want to screw that up. my dad is like going with their ways and i dont want to mess anything up with him that concerns that. i like their way of doing things and stuff but i just can't stand it cuz im a guy and i like guys and i will get bashed in the head one thousand trillion times for it. :/

i don't know what to do that's why i asked for opinions in this kind of sitution. eh. but i dont want to move out right away at this moment. maybe fate will turn my way and everything will go out fine here at home. eh. only fate knows.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

:p
Personally, if I were you, I'd move out... to Iowa (....I like Iowa, it's pretty).
If I'm with people who can't accept me for who I am, and I'm going to feel uncomfortable, then well, I don't want to be in that situation.
Even if you love your family, sometimes being on close quarters with others isn't the best idea (Familiarity breeds contempt!)

[Fruit_Tart.]

hahahaha! iowa? i would want to move somewhere where there are gays and places that we can hang out. like i heard california was a good place too. so is london. or somewheress... :/ lol. :D

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

<.<
I just like Iowa okay? It's pretty. XDD

[TheFame]

I live in toronto. KNOWN for being completely open minded and accepting. My sister has this gay friend, who went to Australia, Shellbourne and he was YELLING of how happy he was. He says that this is like the best place for gays.
He said "When you think of Australia you think desert, but its not like that, its like a small new york who love gays! its just amazing"

so yeah ! :P

Anyways i voted to leave. Seriously dude, you cant think of other people. Its just not worth it if you know you can be so much happier.

I know you might miss your friends and family, but you can always visit family, and youll meet friends who are gay or who love gay people and who are open minded. Dont stay in a jail!

[TheFame]

no. its the only reason i want to go. the lifestyle of the older people is way different from the newer generation and i dont want to screw that up. my dad is like going with their ways and i dont want to mess anything up with him that concerns that. i like their way of doing things and stuff but i just can't stand it cuz im a guy and i like guys and i will get bashed in the head one thousand trillion times for it. :/

i don't know what to do that's why i asked for opinions in this kind of sitution. eh. but i dont want to move out right away at this moment. maybe fate will turn my way and everything will go out fine here at home. eh. only fate knows.


You can either sit on your ass waiting for things that have a chance of not happening, or you can take action and at the end of your life you will have no regrets.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

You can either sit on your ass waiting for things that have a chance of not happening, or you can take action and at the end of your life you will have no regrets.

"Don't you want to take a leap of faith? Or become an old man, filled with regret, waiting to die alone?"
...
Sorry, Inception was far too awesome of a movie to not quote...

[Fruit_Tart.]

You can either sit on your ass waiting for things that have a chance of not happening, or you can take action and at the end of your life you will have no regrets.
why the hell would i sit on my ass waiting for something to happen? im not asking any genie on this damn thing. im asking for help. and i definatlely won't just "sit on my ass" waiting for something.

and sometimes when you do take action you regret sometimes. im not saying always but that's what usually happens to me. i regret somethings that i have done in my past and i wish i could take that back but i can't. and i will take action, and i may regret it but at least i something happens.

[thiscityisdead]

yeah. but that's why im planning out my life. i know that it possibly won't happen but i can hope for it. and my family, well some of em won't ever learn to accept anyone that they already dislike. example A: my dad. and i don't ever want to disappoint him in anything like this especially when he specifically told me not to do anything like "them" meaning gays.

^^^^ well that's just a dumb way of thinking your dad has, why can't he come to terms with reality and just accept "them" for who they are and not what or who their portrayed to be. I know a couple gay guys and there pretty good people to say the least...although their the closet gays I guess you can say cuz not alot of people know but I found out through the grape vine...

What does your father have against gays? There still people..

And dude who doesn't want to move out after college I was just saying it's a very difficult thing to do and like you said needs to be planned out carefully..

Good luck with everything bro

[Fruit_Tart.]

to thiscityisdead: dude. you made my day. i mean this is the cherry to my ice cream sunday. thanks. ^_^ for everything you just said. you made me feel really good about my opinion. thanks once more. :D