Completely lost it.

[KillerKing]

I have never felt so lost and alone in my life.

First off, school. I've recently finished and going back there in 6th form. For a very stupid reason. The reason is a mix between friends and i simply didn't want too leave it but that was so stupid of me. I've got no really close friends there and no one which i can talk to in person about things like this which is why im on here. I like to think they're my friends but i just can't place my trust in them. Also the subjects i'm doing suck and they're all btecs which isn't gonna get me far. I would of much rather gone to college and experience something new and meet new people and have new obstacles to overcome but that path has already become closed because no colleges would be accepting now. So I'm stuck in a school with only people that i talk to to pass time and with subjects that suck.

Secondly I've completely lost myself, i don't know who I am anymore. I didn't have much self confidence but something was there. I could actually trust people but now i can't. I've always seen my 'friends' for what they are and what they are isn't good. They claim to have bset friends yet they betray them and tell stories about how annoying they are. Yet they claim to be my best friend too. Which is why i just can't trust them. Which boils down to me looking at myself and thinking i'm some fat kid with no hope, no friends and no future.

Lastly, I can't handle all of this, I look back on what I used to have and i enjoyed it so much and I've lost it all. 5 years ago people (real friends) would call for me, always ask what I'm doing, always inviting me to things and now, its just gone. So many things have changed and I don't like it. I sit in my room all day thinking about what it would be like to have a completely different life. Instead I'm stuck here in my room on the computer all day.

I've got no one and nothing worth trying for.

[Scarface]

I know exactly how you feel. Trusting people for me is extremely hard and when you do finally start to gain a little trust, it just seems to be far fetched. Like it just seems like you can only trust yourself. What I would suggest with these 'friends' of yours is keep them at a distance, and try to make new friends. You don't need friends that talk shit because that's not real friends. Even though you have to go to shitty lessons now, it doesn't mean all is lost.

This is your fresh start. Even though I'm not so sure what "6th form" is, but try to stay optimistic about it. The friends you have now aren't worth stressing over because they just have no grasp on real friendship. Try not to look over the past as much as it can be painful sometimes looking at how things used to be. You have to try and stay in the moment.

Use college and your present school situation as motivation to try hard so you can achieve it and get there like you really want to. Nothing is impossible only what you limit yourself to. Never do that. Reach for the sky man and I know you're going to make friends. All is not lost. Keep your head up. If you need someone to talk to I'm always here. VM me anytime. I really hope things get better for you.

[playa85]

I hear you....been there done and done that....it boils down to digging deep down and finding the reasons and things that make you unique....special....you have many of those qualities...even though it may be hard to notice them at first, if you try really hard you will come to see what makes you a great person, and when you find those reasons, and come to know who you really are, that will be your motivation to keep going strong. Not for your friends, or family, but for you. You gotta love yourself first before being able to love others. so now that your in a school that sucks, until you can get the heck out of there, concentrate on figuring out why you are as special as you are. Dont ever give up...thats not an option, but succeding is......