minko401
August 12th, 2010, 09:12 PM
This is what's been on my mind the past several days.
At camp last week, I met a girl, we'll call her Jane. I was a bit doubtful of her early in the week, her being 14 and myself being 16. as i got to know her throughout the week, however, i started to really enjoy her company. by saturday (the camp was monday through monday), i found myself missing her whenever i was not with her, and i started to get the feeling that i liked her more than a friend.
saturday night was when things started heating up. she accidentally said some rather insulting things to me, but she said she did not mean them. im pretty sure she didnt, but they still got into my head for about a day.
by sunday, our group of about 10 was incredibly close, and we all loved each other like siblings. on sunday night, jane and i kissed. it wasnt a long, drawn out kiss, it was more of a peck. it had little to no emotional meaning to me, and im pretty sure it had none to her either. later i found out that she had kissed a few other guys, but i still believe all of these kisses were just friendly kisses, seeing how close we were.
on monday morning, before i left, i made sure to take her aside and tell her that i felt that she was an amazing person and i wanted to see more of her after the week was over. we texted the next few days, and yesterday, she texted me that she was confused about this guy, lets call him zack (hes also 14).
zack had gone to the camp with us and was a great friend of mine by that point; he also, evidently, had kissed jane (i was convinced though, that this was a "friend kiss"). she asked me some advice on how to talk to him, and at this point i put my foot down. i told her i wasnt the right guy to ask because i liked her, and she was confused. then i took my sweet time explaining to her that i liked her as more than a friend. at first she didnt believe me, but she was convinced soon thereafter. she was talking to zack in the mean time, and she told him that she liked him. zack said he liked her back, but i am pretty sure his thought process was more along the lines of "cool, she likes me, and shes pretty cute. so ill go for it."
needless to say, by this point i was pretty damn upset. jane apologized for all that she had done, and i was in between wanting to blow up in her face and just being a good friend and saying that it was fine. i decided on the latter.
were all scheduled to get together next week and see each other again, and im feeling a bit better about doing that now. i have cried a few times about it now, as i have never fallen this hard for a girl. its weird, i have never sexually fantasized about her, and i feel that i have so much more respect for her than i have had for any girl ive ever met. any other girl seems completely out of the question, simply because i dont know any other girls on the level i know jane.
my devious little mind was forming a plan, however; i live only about 20 minutes from jane, while zack and jane live an hour plus apart. and given the fact that zack is not absolutely crazy about jane (unlike myself), i doubt he will make a huge effort to go visit her or be with her very often. since jane and i are still good friends, i can hang out with her and get closer to her while zack and jane are together (theyre not together yet, but im assuming theyre going to be soon). im banking on their relationship being short-lived, too, given the aforementioned conditions. lets see how things play out, i guess.
i guess i really needed to get that out there and get feedback on it. feel free to give your advice about what i should do.
At camp last week, I met a girl, we'll call her Jane. I was a bit doubtful of her early in the week, her being 14 and myself being 16. as i got to know her throughout the week, however, i started to really enjoy her company. by saturday (the camp was monday through monday), i found myself missing her whenever i was not with her, and i started to get the feeling that i liked her more than a friend.
saturday night was when things started heating up. she accidentally said some rather insulting things to me, but she said she did not mean them. im pretty sure she didnt, but they still got into my head for about a day.
by sunday, our group of about 10 was incredibly close, and we all loved each other like siblings. on sunday night, jane and i kissed. it wasnt a long, drawn out kiss, it was more of a peck. it had little to no emotional meaning to me, and im pretty sure it had none to her either. later i found out that she had kissed a few other guys, but i still believe all of these kisses were just friendly kisses, seeing how close we were.
on monday morning, before i left, i made sure to take her aside and tell her that i felt that she was an amazing person and i wanted to see more of her after the week was over. we texted the next few days, and yesterday, she texted me that she was confused about this guy, lets call him zack (hes also 14).
zack had gone to the camp with us and was a great friend of mine by that point; he also, evidently, had kissed jane (i was convinced though, that this was a "friend kiss"). she asked me some advice on how to talk to him, and at this point i put my foot down. i told her i wasnt the right guy to ask because i liked her, and she was confused. then i took my sweet time explaining to her that i liked her as more than a friend. at first she didnt believe me, but she was convinced soon thereafter. she was talking to zack in the mean time, and she told him that she liked him. zack said he liked her back, but i am pretty sure his thought process was more along the lines of "cool, she likes me, and shes pretty cute. so ill go for it."
needless to say, by this point i was pretty damn upset. jane apologized for all that she had done, and i was in between wanting to blow up in her face and just being a good friend and saying that it was fine. i decided on the latter.
were all scheduled to get together next week and see each other again, and im feeling a bit better about doing that now. i have cried a few times about it now, as i have never fallen this hard for a girl. its weird, i have never sexually fantasized about her, and i feel that i have so much more respect for her than i have had for any girl ive ever met. any other girl seems completely out of the question, simply because i dont know any other girls on the level i know jane.
my devious little mind was forming a plan, however; i live only about 20 minutes from jane, while zack and jane live an hour plus apart. and given the fact that zack is not absolutely crazy about jane (unlike myself), i doubt he will make a huge effort to go visit her or be with her very often. since jane and i are still good friends, i can hang out with her and get closer to her while zack and jane are together (theyre not together yet, but im assuming theyre going to be soon). im banking on their relationship being short-lived, too, given the aforementioned conditions. lets see how things play out, i guess.
i guess i really needed to get that out there and get feedback on it. feel free to give your advice about what i should do.