celine93
August 7th, 2010, 03:26 PM
I have recently been to see my doctor on account of revealing my suicidal thoughts and feelings to my best friend. She encouraged me to do this, and I told her I would- for her.
the only people I told about my visit to the docs was my friend and my teacher who is e mailing me over the holidays to keep me sane, really.
I received a call on thursday night from my friend and she was hysterical. She was screaming and sobbing and I couldn't understand what was going on.
It took me a while to calm her down and when I did she revealed that she was so worried for me. She told me she felt worthless and that she was partly to blame because she couldn't help me (she lives in Scotland and we only see eachother every few months).
I was trying to reassure her that she does everything she can physically do. But she doesn't believe me.
She then told me that her parents are getting a divorce and she's been suspended from school, and her mum has made an appointment for her to speak to a counsellor because she's not been eating and she's been locking herself away for days.
This has been going on for weeks- but because I was seeing the doctor and counsellors and god knows what else to try and get over myy SH she never told me because we needed to concentrate on me, apprently.
I told her we'd get help together and try to encourage eachother, but she won't listen to me.
She's refusing to see any counsellor or help at all until I'm over my problem, because she thinks it woiuld be too much for me to handle right now.
She text me last night telling me that she 'completely understood how it felt to self harm' and that I wasn't alone. So I text asking if she would tell me if she has been cutting and she hasn't replied since.
I've tried calling her mum and she just says that she is staying out because her and her mum don't get on so she doesn't keep dibs on where she is or what she's doing.
This all started when I told her about me. I was being open because she asked me to be and I love her. We're so close and it's killing me to know that I've done this to her and now I can't help her.
What if I have encouraged her to self harm without realising it?
I wouldn't have opened my mouth if I knew it would have effected her this way.
How can I make sure she's okay? What am I supposed to do now? I didn't mean to hurt her. Ugg!!
Kate
the only people I told about my visit to the docs was my friend and my teacher who is e mailing me over the holidays to keep me sane, really.
I received a call on thursday night from my friend and she was hysterical. She was screaming and sobbing and I couldn't understand what was going on.
It took me a while to calm her down and when I did she revealed that she was so worried for me. She told me she felt worthless and that she was partly to blame because she couldn't help me (she lives in Scotland and we only see eachother every few months).
I was trying to reassure her that she does everything she can physically do. But she doesn't believe me.
She then told me that her parents are getting a divorce and she's been suspended from school, and her mum has made an appointment for her to speak to a counsellor because she's not been eating and she's been locking herself away for days.
This has been going on for weeks- but because I was seeing the doctor and counsellors and god knows what else to try and get over myy SH she never told me because we needed to concentrate on me, apprently.
I told her we'd get help together and try to encourage eachother, but she won't listen to me.
She's refusing to see any counsellor or help at all until I'm over my problem, because she thinks it woiuld be too much for me to handle right now.
She text me last night telling me that she 'completely understood how it felt to self harm' and that I wasn't alone. So I text asking if she would tell me if she has been cutting and she hasn't replied since.
I've tried calling her mum and she just says that she is staying out because her and her mum don't get on so she doesn't keep dibs on where she is or what she's doing.
This all started when I told her about me. I was being open because she asked me to be and I love her. We're so close and it's killing me to know that I've done this to her and now I can't help her.
What if I have encouraged her to self harm without realising it?
I wouldn't have opened my mouth if I knew it would have effected her this way.
How can I make sure she's okay? What am I supposed to do now? I didn't mean to hurt her. Ugg!!
Kate