should you tell if you cheated??

[love_linds]

My friend cheated on her boyfriend. She said she wasn't going to tell him. And I told her she should.
She eventually did. But I don't think she said who it was with or wat they did. Just that she kissed another guy.

So I'm wondering when someone cheats in a reltionship should they tell or not??

[Kaius]

Tbh if they don't tell and the other partner finds out the consequences are going to be much worse than if they were just honest with them. If it ever happened, I'd tell my partner because if you can show you can still be trustworthy enough to admit when you've done something wrong there will be more of a chance of getting that relationship back up than if you lied or kept quiet.

[HellHound]

Only if ur bf/gf is a nice person

[Jenna.]

Tbh if they don't tell and the other partner finds out the consequences are going to be much worse than if they were just honest with them. If it ever happened, I'd tell my partner because if you can show you can still be trustworthy enough to admit when you've done something wrong there will be more of a chance of getting that relationship back up than if you lied or kept quiet.

This. Couldn't have said it better.

[Paladino]

I think if you cheat you need to tell them no matter what, cheating is unfair and cruel, ive been cheated on and it hurt so much. I would never cheat but in an event that I did I would tell my partner.

[love_linds]

I couldn't agree more. And my friend who cheated SAID she is so against it. But then she pulled this shit.
I was so pissed that she did it. Not to mention she didn't consider it cheating. Just cus "it didn't mean anything."
And she said she wasn't gonna tell him because she could just forget about it.
I was so tempted to tell him. Even tho I didn't.

It was just so hard for me knowing that information then I saw him the next day. And he seemed happy because he didn't kno.
And her mom even said not to tell him. That!, I couldn't believe!!!

[Dog Desab]

wow, your right kaius. i kinda cheated once on one of my ex's but it was only a hug so it didnt mean anything to me or the other girl because i'm extremely flirty but i texted my gf at the time and she said its ok...

But our relationship didnt last because my friend and her friend told me she was cheating on me, which hurt me badly... ironic right?

anyway if you ever find out about a friend cheating i dont think you should the person they are dating but instead warn your friend of the consequences of cheating

[Ramiro]

It has never been involved in my relationship but I would like to know if it did

[Obscene Eyedeas]

If one is with someone they don't have any real feeling towards for the sake of a short fun relationship then no because it would be cruel to cause more pain then they already will. It happens so I'm saying it i'm not implying your friend does that but a lot of people do.

If you care then it depends on the individual relationship imo and whether you respect your partner

[Ender]

Tbh if they don't tell and the other partner finds out the consequences are going to be much worse than if they were just honest with them. If it ever happened, I'd tell my partner because if you can show you can still be trustworthy enough to admit when you've done something wrong there will be more of a chance of getting that relationship back up than if you lied or kept quiet.

Couldn't agree more :)
However, if they really loved their bf/gf, then why cheat?

[love_linds]

Couldn't agree more :)
However, if they really loved their bf/gf, then why cheat?

That's exactly what I told her. Because she was explaining to me that she loves him so fucking much. And I said "obviously you don't love him as much as you say. Because then you wouldn't have cheated."
She said she understand what I'm saying but she really does.

Idk, I think it just pisses me off more then anything. Because she thinks that everything is going to be ok with them. And even though they arnt 'together' she acts like they are.

Uuugghhh!!!!! It just makes me so mad how ignorant she is!!!
Damn!!!!
Buuut I try not to stress.
*Breeeeaaaath* lol.

[DanielBoy]

I say yes. They need to be done cheating, and make sure their partner knows that. It is better not to have secrets or lies in any relationship. :D

[OhMightyLion]

Yes, you should be comepletely honest....they deserve the truth, show's respect and maturerity

[misery_business]

I think you should, their most likely to find out so i would be truthfull and honest about it.

[INFERNO]

If you're cheating because you've lost your attraction to someone, then yes you should tell them as there's no reason to drag someone around when they haven't lost their attraction for you. It becomes a 1-way relationship because you'd just be faking your attraction for them. Chances are, they may detect this or hear rumours of it and by denying it, you'd only be straining the relationship further and faking further. No reason why you shouldn't tell.

But, if you cheated for say a day or so but the relationship with your partner isn't weakened, then as long as you can control the cheating so it doesn't get too much, no need to tell. If your partner is not hot-headed, then you may consider telling them. Sometimes, not often, you can have one partner pretty much for sex while the other (first one) is a more emotional one. That's hard to maintain with both parties being fully aware of each other's actions.

[Jenna.]

Couldn't agree more :)
However, if they really loved their bf/gf, then why cheat?

Exactly! I wonder this all the time. Cheating is so wrong and disgusting...how could you do that to someone who you supposedly love?

[prettyprincess]

I generally stay out of others business unless something seriously bad will happen if I dont tell.

[Captor K]

As I am a person of loyalty, I demand loyalty from my partner.

We could sit around the fire all day and talk about why people cheat, how we feel about people who cheat, the ethics (or lack thereof) of cheating, and the consequences of cheating. People cheat for all kinds of reasons, from the very simple, "I had a weak moment" to something as understandable as, "I fell out love. with you and in love with another." We can disagree with the reasons, for cheating is lying, and lying is wrong, but the problem doesn't seem to be cheating in and of itself, but the person.

People are gonna do whatever the hell they want, be it rationally or sometimes irrationally. Criticism won't necessarily help any party here, if not make the situation worse. If she hasn't learned from her mistake, then at some point, she will. I know it is hard to do, but if she has to be forgiven (but her actions not forgotten), and life has to move on. Ideally, we all want and expect honest and committed relationships, but sometimes, shit happens. That's the world we live in. Shame and guilt often causes us to keep silent when we shouldn't. We have to find a way to correct and make peace with our errors, learning not to make them again, and keep kicking.

If she and the guy are still together, I'm assuming they're trying to make peace with it all? And if he left/leaves her, he is well within his rights to do so. Cheating hurts, but you can't be healed unless you forgive the person who hurt you. Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to condone their actions, that you have to put up with them any longer, or remain in a potentially jeopardizing and toxic relationship. You're simply saying, "I recognize your mistake, I wish you to learn from it, not to do it again, and we can start putting this behind us."

So, to answer your question, should people confess if they cheat?

Ethical answer: Yes. Lies catch up with you.
More realistic answer: Probably should, but it doesn't mean it'll happen.

[The Flightless Hawk]

you should definitely tell them because the person they cheated on deserves the complete truth and they might decide to stay with you because yoou told the truth and also they might find out somewhere else which will really not be good for you and they'll probably break up with you