The feeling is too strong

[LiTTleBrok3nDolly]

I get flashbacks so bad that my stomach turns and feels sour and i feel like throwing up, or i go silent and my throat shuts up and i end up getting a sore throat. Or i feel so sad and scared that i think im the only one, my mind gets all foggy. Or those spots that were violated get a "sick" feeling to them. Like i have a strong urge to cover them with a pillow. I can't touch myself, i cant even go to the bathroom.

Is there a way to make these things less intense? The feeling? Maybe thinking to myself that i am safe? But yet again, theres sexual predators living around me, i got so scared and anxious to the point where i looked up around my area BIG mistake, now i made myself more feared. I did this about a month ago.

If any BOYS REPLY TO THIS IF U SAY SOMETHING RUDE THINK BEFORE YOU SAY IT

Ive been through so much ridicule i should have committed suicide when i was 8. Oh well, 9 years too late. :(

[sarah newman]

okay, firstly, u made the right decision 2 not commit suicide when u were 8 x

u can cope wiv things rather then killin yourself xx

maybe c someone to help u with these fears? u dont need to be scared of where ever u go x

maybe keep yourself busy, meet up wiv friends? so u dont think bad thoats x

hope this helps :)

pm me anytime xx

[Scarface]

First of all killing yourself would not be the best option. As killing yourself is permanent. It is a decision that is irreversible. I know the feeling of paranoia. I was abused as a child. I was beaten. I was mentally tormented and tortured with self doubt. Then the flashbacks come from when I see everything so vividly. The feelings. The smells. Everything felt so real like I had to relive it again.

I can feel and remember going through what you have. The first thing I would do before I start getting to that feeling is I would switch my thoughts. I would start thinking about something nice. I would think about something happy. I force myself to think of something happy. That way the flashback doesn't start. I remember making paranoid delusions of things that just were irrational. Don't do that. Even though you live in an area like that. Those kinds of people are everywhere. I know because I have a lot of those in my area as well, but I don't think about it. I just have to think positive no matter what as hard as it is. Just try not to keep all of these negative thoughts in your head. Keep yourself occupied.

If you ever need someone to talk to I'm always here VM me anytime. I hope things get better for you.