MadManWithaBox
June 16th, 2010, 06:30 PM
Her thoughts? God is not on her side. She could see the peace she desires, she craves. It was in reach. Then her mother had to enter the room. Shattered.And now?
The ambulance. The wailing sirens. The stitches threading through the wound on and in her arm. The nurses with the unsympathetic smiles on their faces. Sneering at her. The poor girl who slashed her wrists. She wants to die anyway, so who cares?
Psychiatrists. Doctors. Her mum. Her sister. Her brother. All trying to draw her into a pointless discussion about it. They don't understand it. They'll never understand. She doesn't want them to understand. Let those nurses, with their sneers, and superior, silent leers, mock her.
But now, they all talk of making her life better, of moving through and past these dark days, into bright, broad lit horizons. All this talk, designed to help her? Making her ten times worse. And while they talk about being open, and sharing things, they talk behind her back, when they think she isn't listening. Referring to her as mentally unstable, fucked up. Hypocrites, the lot of them. She is, in her own mind, the only sane patient in this asylum.
Her mother, not talking, not ever. Able to speak for hours, but not say a word. Never dealing with any issues, not ever. This will be brushed aside, like so many other things, swept under the rug. A terrible accident, is how she'll describe it, to her friends. She says it enough times, maybe she'll start to believe it too.
The ambulance. The wailing sirens. The stitches threading through the wound on and in her arm. The nurses with the unsympathetic smiles on their faces. Sneering at her. The poor girl who slashed her wrists. She wants to die anyway, so who cares?
Psychiatrists. Doctors. Her mum. Her sister. Her brother. All trying to draw her into a pointless discussion about it. They don't understand it. They'll never understand. She doesn't want them to understand. Let those nurses, with their sneers, and superior, silent leers, mock her.
But now, they all talk of making her life better, of moving through and past these dark days, into bright, broad lit horizons. All this talk, designed to help her? Making her ten times worse. And while they talk about being open, and sharing things, they talk behind her back, when they think she isn't listening. Referring to her as mentally unstable, fucked up. Hypocrites, the lot of them. She is, in her own mind, the only sane patient in this asylum.
Her mother, not talking, not ever. Able to speak for hours, but not say a word. Never dealing with any issues, not ever. This will be brushed aside, like so many other things, swept under the rug. A terrible accident, is how she'll describe it, to her friends. She says it enough times, maybe she'll start to believe it too.