This fucking feeling again.

[REGRET]

I get this feeling everytime I'm alone at home. I start thinking about everyone that has been mean to me, and then I start thinking that I'm not worth anything anyways, so why continue living? I start thinking that when I start school again this fall (I'm on summerbreak) I won't have any friends, because they don't want to be friends with a cutting emo.
I don't want to cut again, I've been clean for a week and three days today. I have such a strong urge to cut.

[Sith Lord 13]

My suggestion is to distract yourself. You don't have to cut. You're stronger than your urges.

[Mike321]

Well done for bieng clean for over a week, thats really good
And as Alex said try and distract yourself, and keep fighting the urges
Dont let hthem get the better of you

[NightFighter]

Well, you need to realise that everyone has had someone being mean to them at one point. There is not a single person in history that everyone has liked. It's simply because people are different. So, try not to think about it too much. It just means that you are unique.

Also, forgive me when i say this, but when you said that you are worthless, well, that's quite frankly ridiculous. Everyone is worth living. The chances of getting pregnant is actually very slim therefore everyone is a miracle. You don't know and you never will know how much you mean to people. Everyone you know- you have affected their life. And i know that you (like every single person in the world) is not perfect and has hurt people but that doesn't make you worthless. You have also enriched people's life's. Don't even try to tell me im wrong. You must have made atleast one person smile in all of your years alive. I think that managing to make one person smile means your life has been worthwhile and is important.

About your friends- if they don't stand by you and care for you when you really need them then really, are they worth the bother? VT is proof that there are still teenagers that are understanding, compassionate and caring. Don't feel like you need those friends. You don't. There is bound to be someone else in school that is just like a member of VT. Just try looking. But if you do feel like your friends are worth a second thought then i'd suggest you try to please them: don't cut. I know its not quite so simple (if only!) but if you cared about them and their feelings then that should be motivation enough for you to quit self harm. It's not as strong a monster as you think. There is plenty of ways to control the urges. Just fight them and do your best. Explain to your friends about the addictive side. I know many people are unaware about how self harm is addictive. Tell them you need them to help you. If they are worth it, they will help.

Personally, i found it easier to quit once i stopped counting the days since i last cut. This is because when i did count it was constantly on my mind but once i stopped counting it stopped running through my mind. I even forgot about it sometimes. It is also handy because despite the length of time clean from it, it always seems longer in your mind which is a strong motivator for declining the temptation. So, that's something you should think about too.

Just one last thought- if you really do want to quit you will quit. You can overcome self harm. Many people do. And those people are happy and strong individuals. They fought their demon and they won. You can too. Just do your best.

Take care and all the best,
Sarah

[REGRET]

Well, you need to realise that everyone has had someone being mean to them at one point. There is not a single person in history that everyone has liked. It's simply because people are different. So, try not to think about it too much. It just means that you are unique.

Also, forgive me when i say this, but when you said that you are worthless, well, that's quite frankly ridiculous. Everyone is worth living. The chances of getting pregnant is actually very slim therefore everyone is a miracle. You don't know and you never will know how much you mean to people. Everyone you know- you have affected their life. And i know that you (like every single person in the world) is not perfect and has hurt people but that doesn't make you worthless. You have also enriched people's life's. Don't even try to tell me im wrong. You must have made atleast one person smile in all of your years alive. I think that managing to make one person smile means your life has been worthwhile and is important.

About your friends- if they don't stand by you and care for you when you really need them then really, are they worth the bother? VT is proof that there are still teenagers that are understanding, compassionate and caring. Don't feel like you need those friends. You don't. There is bound to be someone else in school that is just like a member of VT. Just try looking. But if you do feel like your friends are worth a second thought then i'd suggest you try to please them: don't cut. I know its not quite so simple (if only!) but if you cared about them and their feelings then that should be motivation enough for you to quit self harm. It's not as strong a monster as you think. There is plenty of ways to control the urges. Just fight them and do your best. Explain to your friends about the addictive side. I know many people are unaware about how self harm is addictive. Tell them you need them to help you. If they are worth it, they will help.

Personally, i found it easier to quit once i stopped counting the days since i last cut. This is because when i did count it was constantly on my mind but once i stopped counting it stopped running through my mind. I even forgot about it sometimes. It is also handy because despite the length of time clean from it, it always seems longer in your mind which is a strong motivator for declining the temptation. So, that's something you should think about too.

Just one last thought- if you really do want to quit you will quit. You can overcome self harm. Many people do. And those people are happy and strong individuals. They fought their demon and they won. You can too. Just do your best.

Take care and all the best,
Sarah

I know I'm not wothless, I just feel that way. And I don't feel worthless because I hurt people, I try to be as humble and nice as I can. I feel worthless because all my friends turn out to be fake, they all leave me after a while. That's why I don't want new friends, I don't bother to find new friends because I know they will leave me in the end. It may sound stupid and childish but that's what I'm afraid of.
I think I should just stick by them because I only have one year left in this school, then I can forget all about them and start fresh in another school. They can hurt me all they want for now, I don't have the strenght to stop them.

[georgiamay]

ok, first of all, well done for not cutting for 1 week and 3 days :D

dont give up now though, it's not worth it!!! tell these people how feel, and show them that there's a lot more to self harm than being a "cutting emo" which so many people seem to have as a stereotype ingraved into their minds.

if these people are worth being friends with, they'll listen, and try to understand how you feel, and accept you the way you are. dont expect them to understand though. its such a hard thing to understand unless you've been through it yourself.

keep fighting you're urges!! the fact that you've stopped for this amount of time proves that you are stronger than your urges, and that you can keep going!!

PM me if you ever need to talk, i'm always here :) x

[LoveMe_HateMe]

I know I'm not wothless, I just feel that way. And I don't feel worthless because I hurt people, I try to be as humble and nice as I can. I feel worthless because all my friends turn out to be fake, they all leave me after a while. That's why I don't want new friends, I don't bother to find new friends because I know they will leave me in the end. It may sound stupid and childish but that's what I'm afraid of.
I think I should just stick by them because I only have one year left in this school, then I can forget all about them and start fresh in another school. They can hurt me all they want for now, I don't have the strenght to stop them.

I'm not gonna tell you that if your friends were true, they'd stick by you, cause you've heard it all before. But I do know exactly how you feel. I'm in exactly the same position as you. To be honest, I'm not sure why I'm posting this to you cause I don't really have any advice for you, I spose I'm just letting you know that your not the only in your position. But don't give up. Things will look up in the future (god I feel such a hypocrite saying that >_< ) but, enough of my babble :P