Do you feel like you alienate people?

[TravM]

I feel as if I've alienate the people around me. I can have a good conversation with someone, and be very happy. Then I want to continue talking to them more, but they seem to not want to. I can feel and hear people getting bored with me. I wish I wasn't like this. Does anybody else feel this way?

[haibekah]

i totally understand how you feel. most people are like that. they stare right through you because most people only care about themselves. it's those special people that make you feel like you belong somewhere. you should try meeting new people. try coming out of your bubble maybe!

[kyler]

well i think everyone does i guess. sometimes i try to hard and run outta good stuff to talk about an yea it gets boring and they wanna take off

[janthem]

tht happens to me sometimes

[steve1234]

Often happens to me. Maybe I need to get some better friends. Ive got so fed up with people getting bored with me, I hardly talk anymore.

Maybe you should try and find some new friends, or different people to talk to, as they may not feel alienated.
Also you could try asking people why they seem to get bored with you. This has sometimes worked for me, but It might make you look paranoid.

[INFERNO]

Everyone feels like this and does this. If someone is happy because, say they got a great job position and they talk about it to a friend who just lost a great job position, that friend may be bummed out and you see the alienation. It's not a problem unless you constantly brag about yourself or someone else or give unnecessarily long lectures during a discussion as that would annoy people quite a lot.

If you get this experience, then try to change the topic to something you think the person will like or has something to talk about. For example, if A says to B "oh man, I just had the best week" and B says "me too, you go first". If A doesn't stop bragging, then B will eventually feel alienated. To stop this, A should say something like "how was your week" or "did you get [thing/person B wanted]?". During the conversation, A should try to keep a balance so that B can follow the goal of the conversation (talking about whatever happened to A) while allowing B to participate so it's a two-way conversation. For example, A says part of what happened then allows B to relate to it or comment on it rather than talk over B and continue with the one-way conversation.

There's another way, which is the "hold on, I just got a text". Pretend someone has texted you, tell the person it's vibrate only and that you're going to step away to answer it. While doing so, watch to see if B is going to leave, if so, let them, otherwise return and say "sorry about that, how was your week?". Do this even if you haven't completely finished if B is bored as hell or annoyed with the bragging. Don't do it too often because it does become suspicious and they'll catch on. You need to make the faking look authentic, so just open a text message and type whatever while doing the proper emotions, such as a little giggle or whatever. If B asks what it was, say something like "oh [person] just called and asked if I wanted to go/do [thing]". It's great if it's a person B doesn't know so you don't end up getting caught in a lie later on, less explaining and faster to get B to talk about their week.

Don't pretend it's a call because it's harder to fake and many phones now have a mini display window on the outside so B can see that no call is actually occurring. Explaining why you're faking makes the situation odd for you.

[wishuponastar]

everyone does tht sometime in their life

[Haydzzz]

I dont really alienate people like that cause people tend to wanna talk to me but i act very out there and dont think about what i do before i do it. so i alienate alot of people like that and then i feel pretty bad about it.

[Ryhanna]

Yeah, I think I know what you mean Travis...
You feel as though you're friends but then suddenly it's awkward and silent.

I think the first reply was the most helpful: Come out of your bubble, don't be afraid to say things or crack a joke... if they don't think it's funny - who cares? It's not like you do it for money :)

[imcool_17]

i try not to alienate peopl but im sure everyone does it at least once, but yeah i've felt that way before