1_21Guns
June 2nd, 2010, 10:10 AM
its all kicking off in my head.
i need it.
no you want it
i need it
no you want it
i need it
no you want it
SHUT UP GODAMNIT.
urgh.
i cant take it.
im going to pay for this later.
all this bottleing up im doing to help everyone else
its what i always do.
and im going to fall apart and cut myself to pieces by the end of the week.
not yet. my best friend isnt okay yet.
i need to be strong till then.
but god help me when i know she's fine.
ill do what i always do
beat myself up.
listen to things that kill me.
hack myself to pieces
then watch the blood pour.
then regret it all.
feel like a twat.
tell someone because i feel guilty.
and watch one thing fall after the next.
a little like dominoes.
then ill pick them all back up again. execept again, they're close than before.
so they fall quicker next time.
because everyones going to be sick of this.
everyones going to be sick of me.
im just a whiney kid. that deseverves everything she gets.
but still pulls everyone down with her
because shes too weak to stand up for herself.
then when nobody can help her.
she falls apart.
like the weak mess she really is.
but nobody see's that.
because shes a liar.
a good one.
nobody knows.
so whats it matter
who's it hurting?
me.
and what does that matter?
it doesn't.
i'm done.
seriously.
i'm done.
:blowup:
i need it.
no you want it
i need it
no you want it
i need it
no you want it
SHUT UP GODAMNIT.
urgh.
i cant take it.
im going to pay for this later.
all this bottleing up im doing to help everyone else
its what i always do.
and im going to fall apart and cut myself to pieces by the end of the week.
not yet. my best friend isnt okay yet.
i need to be strong till then.
but god help me when i know she's fine.
ill do what i always do
beat myself up.
listen to things that kill me.
hack myself to pieces
then watch the blood pour.
then regret it all.
feel like a twat.
tell someone because i feel guilty.
and watch one thing fall after the next.
a little like dominoes.
then ill pick them all back up again. execept again, they're close than before.
so they fall quicker next time.
because everyones going to be sick of this.
everyones going to be sick of me.
im just a whiney kid. that deseverves everything she gets.
but still pulls everyone down with her
because shes too weak to stand up for herself.
then when nobody can help her.
she falls apart.
like the weak mess she really is.
but nobody see's that.
because shes a liar.
a good one.
nobody knows.
so whats it matter
who's it hurting?
me.
and what does that matter?
it doesn't.
i'm done.
seriously.
i'm done.
:blowup: