Suicidal thoughts

[Hajiku]

Ive probably done more damage to my family than to myself
I have been thinking thouroughy about how i would commit suicide.
And how it would benefit my family.
1)i wouldnt fuck-up anything with my family like i have done in the passed year.
2)i have life insurance so when i die parrents get Money
3)Parrents dont Really like me so if i die they wont give a fuck.
4)Brothers might care seeing as how when my dad nearly killed me they abcked him off.
World would go arround, Just 1 more obichuary More in the newspaper.
Alls i need to do is just Open this bottle of extra strength tylenol and start popping 4 at a time untill the bottles empty.

[Bobby]

Somebody cares. Suicide i think is the worst kind of killing. you shouldn't do it. you mean something to someone.

[Hajiku]

Like who?
My whole family hates me.

[Bobby]

Like your whole entire family? don't you have friends that care?.

Besides your family hating you, why do you wan to kill yourself.

[Hajiku]

Imonly 14 and ive already done more bad things than anyone should at my age.
I dont have friends.
if you really want to help me you'd add me on MSN.

[Bobby]

I don't have msn, but if you want you can Private Message me :)

[Hajiku]

I really dont like Pm-tag.
AIM?

[Bobby]

yes... bob91593

[Hajiku]

Wow, its not just my family that hates me, its the whole world :/

[Bobby]

The whole world does not hate you....

[Hajiku]

you big liar.

[Bobby]

I don't hate you, and I doubt anyone on this site hates you.

[Hajiku]

right. I bet theres some Emo-hatingMcSonofabitch out there waiting for this very post.

[Bobby]

Actually there are a good amount of people on this site that are into the whole emo/punk thing.

Please don't do it.

[~Dazed&&Confused~]

ye i don't hate you :).. and suicide is not the answer.. i mean you're 14!.. you have a whole life ahead.. you'll make new friends and meet new people.. some you don't like some you like and some you care about which you'll think your life now actually has a meaning..

[TheWizard]

I care so don't do it because I would never be able to live knowing you killed yourself because I couldn't help you.

[what the?]

Calm down mate. What on earth makes you think that the whole world hates you. I don't hate you. I'm pretty sure there's a hell of a lot more people who don't hate you out there. Just look how many people there are right here, right now, who want to help you. No matter how much it might seem your family hates you, I very much doubt they do. What is it that is so bad in your life right now, that couldn't be resolved, that would make you want to kill yourself. Go on, ask yourself, is it really worth losing out on something you can never ever regain? Like everyone has said, you're only 14. You've got a whole life ahead of you. A life that you could make something of, don't give up now?! Whatever it is that is so bad in your life, you have a lifetime to sort out, to turn around. Please reconsider, we would all hate to see you go...

[Physicist]

Hey hey, calm down, obviously your brothers care about you. And maybe they don't show it but your parents love you to, and they would be devestated if you were taken from them in any way.

[darkman]

Life is indeed difficult, trust me I know, but like everyone else said, I don't hate you. You have the potential to change, you are only 14 years old and you have a life ahead of you. Life has so many obsticales, it can almost render it unbearable, but there are so many great aspects to you have yet to fully embrace. Think about intimate love, friendship, education, money, traveling, there is so much to life that you have yet to understand to try to take in. Suicide will just take you away from it all and you will have died in vain. You have to try to change your ways, you family will always love you despite what you do, but in this instance, you are able to change yourself. Change yourself for the better and your family will realize that you are making an effort and they will "love" you again. Life is tough, keep going and make the best of it. Take it from someone that is at a roadblock in life...

[Hajiku]

Well, how the hell you guys feel you obliged to "save" my life is beyond me but.
Thanks for your support and all those other things, changing my ways would mean for me to:
Stop being on the computer and devote my life to being my families, Bitch/and or Slave.
Do any, and all work in school and go insane.
Give up all of my friends I have made over the..6 years I've had a computer w/internet.
Get off the Drugs, Oxycontin, and Pot
Stop being the little meniacal bastard I am and stop having sudden urges to steal my parrents credit card and spending money on nothing.
Stop playing the game I have been playing for the passed 4 years, Darkages.
I Really, really hate how everyone says "You have a life ahead of you" Bullshit the way im going or "was" going i would have had a world of Jumps on the street, and getting my ass kicked by my dad. I would basically be in a living hell with the benefit of food, and a place to stay untill im 16-18ish then im out of the house on my own and back to the drugs.
So tell me right now, why I shouldnt Just give it all up. Tell me why I shouldnt open this bottle and take everysingle one of these pills. Tell me why I should stop slitting my wrists and cutting my arms. Tell me why I should care what you say?

[Bobby]

If your just going to kill yourself then do it, you won't accept our help so why did you post this topic, Why??
I told I didn't want you to harm yourself, but then you practically say you don't care what we say, so why post??

[what the?]

If your just going to kill yourself then do it, you won't accept our help so why did you post this topic, Why??
I told I didn't want you to harm yourself, but then you practically say you don't care what we say, so why post??


Exactly. If you're not going to take any notice of what we say anyway, why did you bother with this thread? :eyebrow:

[Hajiku]

Im asking, why you care,

[Parasite]

You aren't going to do it.
If you were you wouldn't be talking, you would be doing.

[what the?]

Because we're decent human beings who care about other people and not just ourselves...

[Bobby]

Because we're decent human beings who care about other people and not just ourselves...

Exactly...

[Hajiku]

You aren't going to do it.
If you were you wouldn't be talking, you would be doing.
what if i came here to get help?What if i just needed those extra people to tell me not to do it? What if your an asshole?

[Parasite]

What if you are an emo kid craving attention?
You already said you were going to do it and it's pretty obvious that you need attention. No one can help you, but yourself. Sure, I can give you a nice comment. It will make you feel a lot better for 10 minutes and you will crash down even harder next time.
I would help you, but I truly don't think you are suicidal.
The week before I attempted suicide,
I couldn't get out of bed, nor could I force myself to get a username to a forum and write explicit posts on "suicide" and "severe depression".
The fact is, thousands ..no millions of teens in the world feel the way you feel right now.
Your attempts to "flame me" or lower my self esteem in any way have failed.
Stop doing what ever you are doing ( I know, easier said than done!)
And get your life in control.
You control your outcome in life.
Not your father,
your razor,
or your converse shoes,
or even the people that want you to fail.

[darkman]

Haijiku, I'm quite puzzled on where you are coming from. You have asked for help on this forum, and yet you don't want to even attempt to try to take any advice or try to hear any of us out. You are saying that inorder to become "unsuicidial", you have to completely change your lifestyle. Why do you have to get rid of all of your friends? I don't understand that, I also thought you said that no one on the Earth loves or cares about you? If that were the case you'd have no one in the world to turn to, but if these are just exploition friends and just make the situation worse, ditch them, but if not, seek their advice. If you didn't wnat to listen to us, why did you make a topic about it? Suicide and depression isn't a joke, it's not a way you should be trying to obtain attention from others, it's a serious issue. As Parasite said in this previous post, you control your life. There are sometimes that might however be unchangeable, but you are able to control your furture. Wheither you like the phrase or not, it's true. "You have a life ahead of you". Why give up life now? Yes, it's difficult, but it's not all over.