TigerLily
May 26th, 2010, 05:58 PM
I have too many of these sh/depressing/general bullshitty poems >_> most are pretty old though, summer/autumn '09
Cyanide
There was a poet, don’t you know it
With hair of blazing red
The kind of girl who ruled the world
‘Til before twenty she’d end up dead.
And when she wrote it was so haunting
Every night was Halloween
But I’ll always say her writing
Was the best I’d ever seen.
If she couldn’t find a pencil
She’d carve her words into her skin
And I’m sure they’re still there stencilled
Into her heart deepest within.
They all said she was crazy
I’d say they were probably right
But the sane don’t keep on shining
In the darkest of the night…
Believing in dreams is so much harder with insomnia
She bet her dying breath on the truth of paranoia
So many nights spent wishing I’d have saved her
But what’s there to do when her destiny was to enslave her
She wrote a little note to me telling of her suicide
They later said the ink was made up of cyanide
Reading her last poem, god knows how many tears I cried
Because she never should have fucking gone, never should have died…
“Eyeliner cobwebs are turning scarlet
And this heart it seems too broken and scarred yet…”
No, no, no, no, no…
“Washed-out hope’s so faded and far ‘cept
Maybe this way I’ll learn how to forget”
Please, don’t let me go…
“My future’s amazing you say that you’ll bet
But gambling on maybes left me in so much debt”
Did you know I loved you so?
“By the time that you have read this rhyme,
I’ll be six feet under a rainbow mine”
I guess you’ll never know.
“Don’t you go crying,
I’ve only gone flying”
Sorry, no can do.
“See you in a dream sometime soon,
I’ll be the one sitting on the eclipse of the moon”
I see you every night, my dear.
“Goodbye”
Forever.
“I love you”
And always.
Windowpain
In English class time rarely flies
Trying to teach us how to verbalize
Said to imagine a window in our minds
Just close your eyes now, close your eyes.
Now look out of the window, what do you see?
Mumbled something bout individuality
But what I saw scared the shit out of me
“No wrong, no right” - I’d have to disagree
Because the window was open staring out to the night
And the cold wind it howled and it seemed to invite
Me to come and join, baby, it will be all right
Just follow me to the clouds, I swear I don’t bite
Come fly with me, come lets go flying
It’s not all that bad, the thrill of dying
You’ve got nothing to lose but those days of crying
They say there’s hope, but honey they’re lying.
I am your friend
You’re happy ending
Come now darling
Lets stop pretending
This shattered soul
Is beyond mending
So lets stop living
And start fending
For ourselves, our broken wings
Will stop us feeling anything
Now take my hand
To the promised land
You wished all night
Now it’s my demand
Sweetheart, for the time is nigh
To go a fly up to the sky
Never gonna hide and never gonna lie
Just gonna watch this cold world pass us by
And it won’t cry, no it won’t cry
A mere sigh of relief as we kiss it goodbye…
So come on baby, your curtain calls
Hold your head high and stand up tall
Take your final curtsey, last bow of all
Cause baby, now it’s time to fall.
Papier Palace
I know that people have flaws
And even though dark trees have claws
There’s no need to shed a tear
Because you take away my fear
Even when the world’s gone wrong
I know that I can be strong
For when my hurting hurts you
Then its time to pull through…
Cause your teardrops fall like acid rain
And sting deeper than any pain
Than ever could be brought by a knife
The night you scared me to life
While this playing card pyramid crashes around me
(Let’s not be scared)
It will all be all right, honey, someday you’ll see
(Just like you said)
We’ll be the new broken-hearted monarchy
(I’ll have my court in your arms)
Someday we’ll run away, won’t you run away with me?
I’ll be your Queen of Heart
And you’ll be the King of Mine
This time we won’t fall apart
No cards will tumble this time
As we build our paper palace back
Out of the dusty mess
We’ll leave the jokers out of the pack
It will be perfect, no less.
Cause the teardrops falling from your eyes
Leave my poor heart paralysed
Just like a bullet through the brain
Your hurt means I can’t feel again
So, honey, we won’t hurt again
No, we’ll run away from all this pain
And it will never be the same again
No more clouds of acid rain…
Just Fine
She’s breaking.
She’s crying.
She’s faking.
She’s lying.
She’s losing her mind.
She’s dying inside.
She’s failing.
She’s hurting.
This damn plan
Aint working.
She stands alone,
She can’t take it anymore,
She picks up the phone,
And falls to the floor.
The end of the day,
On the end of the line:
“You’re sure you’re ok?” --
One tear.
One lie.
One fear.
Oh why
Does
It
Always
Have
To
Be
Me?
The end of the day,
On the end of the line:
“You’re sure you’re ok?”
Deep breath… “I’m fine”
Untitled (Written for a friend at the time)
Huddled in a corner,
I see you in my mind,
Alone, and living without,
The peace you seek to find.
Frightened in a corner,
Tears running down your face,
Wishing you could be anywhere,
But in this hellhole of a place.
Crying in a corner,
I wish there was something I could do,
If only we could turn back time,
If only I knew.
Desperate in a corner,
I see you reach your hand,
To reach the blade to take away,
This pain you could no longer stand.
Don’t return to that corner,
That could have taken you away from me,
Don’t forget how much I love you,
And just how loved you will always be.
Don’t forget that you’re amazing,
And don’t stop believing in tomorrow,
Don’t forget your immense strength,
That will pull you through your sorrow.
Don’t forget I’ll always be here,
Even through the darkest of your days,
And that your courage and spirit
To me, will never cease to amaze.
Don’t forget your beauty,
Both on the inside and the out,
Don’t forget that little fighter,
Whose courage none can doubt.
And, this might be selfish,
But it is what I need to say,
Please don’t ever leave me,
Because I just couldn’t live that way.
The Masquerade Parade
Putting on the façade,
Living the masquerade,
Life’s not all that hard,
In the happy parade.
She puts on her persona,
Her happy-go-lucky disguise,
Had they ever really known her,
Enough to see through the lies?
And maybe someday they’ll see,
Those porcelain scars,
But hidden away they must be,
Buried so deep, lost so far…
Now don’t get me wrong,
Not every smile was a fake,
But as the cold night drags on,
The façade starts to break.
Mascara Rivers
I don’t need your insults,
I don’t need your lies,
I don’t need to remember,
I don’t need to cry,
I don’t need your fear,
No matter how you try,
I don’t need your tears,
None will fall from these eyes.
Pass The Parcel (Just Don't Take Too Long About It)
Once upon a suburbia, there’s this little girl,
She’s small and easy to lose in this big wide world,
One out of millions, but with her own little surprise,
But you wouldn’t care to take the time to realize.
Maybe you’ve seen her, or maybe you’ve not,
Maybe you remember something, but conveniently forgot,
Maybe you caught a rare glimpse of those untrusting eyes,
But didn’t take a second took - time presses on, must fly.
Only time lasts forever and a day, just when you want it to,
Never running out for comfortable truths and idyllic suburban views,
But there are some things that don’t fit into your pretty picture frame,
Don’t worry though; they don’t exist as long as you don’t give them a name.
So if you see her, beware, she has this haunted quality about her,
The sharp glass in her stare that lingers longer than you would prefer,
You might only see past for a second, but a second’s all it takes,
For this invading reality to make your handcrafted utopia look fake.
(And we wouldn’t want that now, would we?
If you can be blind, why bother to see?)
Please keep on walking by, there is nothing to see here,
Of course she will be ok, never mind, never fear,
Just pass down the parcel, hand her down the line,
Let somebody else not give a damn this time.
(Didn’t take much convincing now, did you?
Good good, hurry now; people to see, things to do.)
She really is a nuisance, that little child freak,
Crashing into your thoughts, oh God, what cheek!
But don’t give it a second thought, now she’s walking home now for the night,
She’ll play a special kind of rope swing, and won’t bother you again, all right.
The Angel With The Button Nose And The Night She Saved My Life
See the look upon her face,
As she makes this fall from grace,
That perfect poise has been destroyed,
But what will be left in its place?
She looks around these four blank walls,
She feels so trapped, she feels so small,
Hating her life she spies the knife,
Buts it’s not enough to satisfy the call…
Inside her heart that’s racing fast,
Now clear thinking is a thing of the past,
She wanted to escape via the pills that she’d take,
She just didn’t want this pain to last.
But she never wanted to die,
Only to blackout for a while,
Maybe LiCO3 could allow her flee,
From the chasing demons, tears and lies.
The knife was too blunt and the pills needed more,
To send her collapsing to the floor,
She was still too alive to feel the fear inside,
Then she heard the turn of the door.
It was her little sister standing there,
With her button nose and long brown hair,
Thank God she never saw the madness hidden on the floor,
But that sight that night caused her big sister’s heart to tear.
There was a shiver down her spine,
As she knew she’d crossed the line,
This was wrong and she needed to be strong,
She needed to fight and someday it’d be fine.
She sunk the pills down the drain and to the kitchen with the knife,
Only it was harder to dispose of the pain and the strife,
But she knew she could and that someday she would,
For the angel who had just saved her life.
Never Wanted To Go
My shoulders were not made to stand this weight,
My mind not prepared to last this fight,
Armed with nothing a heart already broken,
My weak knees will surrender to the ground,
Is a promise of a future enough to keep me
Walking through this valley of helplessness,
Or is it not a promise, merely a lie,
To keep me running away to the place
I never wanted to go…
Anaethetised Sunrise
There’s something about a quarter to four,
That takes away the pain, takes away the joy,
Strips all emotion bare ‘til there’s nothing more,
The perfect solace for a heart destroyed.
I don’t get all that much sleep these days,
Can’t say I’m too bothered either way,
As the window before me captures my gaze,
I’m watching, waiting for that pre-sunrise haze…
All through the day I wear my masquerade,
For myself or those around me, I’m not quite sure,
But the night draws in and the façade starts to fade,
As the dry tears start to fall and the clock strikes four.
With the cold air surrounding me I’m anaesthetised,
I can’t feel that pain I know is lingering inside,
I told you I was fine but, darling, I lied,
Because honey, those nights, I cried, I cried…
I didn’t see the lightning, but I sure felt the shock,
I never got the diagnosis, but it sure hurt like hell,
I don’t know anything at all; maybe it’s just my luck,
I don’t know how far I must fall; maybe it’s just as well.
While they were sleeping, I walked up to the rooftop,
Before me a glistening sea and one hell of a drop,
I was never going to jump, not that over-the-top,
But, damn, I sure wanted everything to stop…
There’s something about a quarter to five,
That brings back all the pain, but none of the joy,
Dead enough not to care that you’re even alive,
The perfect signature of a spirit destroyed.
Flutterby’s Got A Vengeance (Did I Forget To Mention The Knife?)
Secrets are meant for shoeboxes in the bottom of wardrobes,
Secrets are meant for an eternity on the ocean floor,
Secrets are meant to be secrets forever,
Secrets aren’t meant to hurt me anymore.
The past a place to which you can’t return,
The past a place where old wounds cease to sting,
The past a place from which wise lessons you learn,
And the past need not mean a thing.
but then the old bugger follows you and the wardrobe doors come crashing open and the tsunami swept the secrets from the sea to the streets and now they’re all over this city but I can’t leave and I want to runaway to the land of the masquerade parade and I don’t want to come back not now not ever.
Those scars were years old
Now they’re healed and blind to the eye
Or so I thought but then again
You must have seen something in me
Because I never told you
You saw for yourself
And how did you do that
If there was nothing left to see?
because you cant go to the past but the past can come to you and stalk you every night like the monster under the bed that you dismissed a long time ago but really all you needed was to be more aware because it never went away and no it will never go away and yes its still there waiting to pounce and no you’re not bigger nor stronger than the monster and yes the monster it wants your blood.
When you let the butterfly out of the cage
You have got to expect its rage
It never wanted to be locked away
Now flutterby’s gonna stab you in the back
Today.
And when you’ve got monsters under the bed baring their sharp teeth
And flutterby butterfly’s got a real sharp knife
And all you have in your defence are a few broken dreams
And a handful of saltwater missiles from the arsenal in the corner of your eye
Is all you have to fight with for your life
Well, then you know you’re fucked.
Meh.
Arabella
Cotton cobwebs fall down her thigh
Didn’t want to drown in the lies
Run, swim, now fly to the wild
Escape your destiny, my sweet child.
Cotton cobwebs form a second skin
Masquerading the pandemonium within
The end is her new favourite place to begin
Who would have guessed spiders could sing?
Cotton cobwebs like intricate lace
Catastrophic serenity frames her face
As she ponders on her fall from grace
Arabella, get the fuck out of this place.
“My dear friends,
This is my end,
Arachne, please
Will you help me?
I don’t want to die
Alone
I can’t do this
On my own.”
By cobwebs her lips together are tied…
Can’t scream anymore.
Pinned down to the floor.
Her nose now wrapped in her silky demise…
Can’t breathe anymore.
Dies on the bathroom floor.
With her last stolen breath, tries to apologize…
Who would have guessed
Spiders could cry?
A funeral procession of sixty billion legs
In melancholy silence crawled to the pier
They abandoned their fine safety ropes
Having left them by the bathroom sink in fear
They formed a line as the angels cried
That night they say that innocence died
Arabella and her friends brought a tear to my eye
For there’s nothing quite sadder than spider suicide.
Freefalling Rose Petals Caught On The Wind of Wasted Breath
I cling on to three words
But my grasp is getting weaker
And their power is fading
Which is a pity
When they’re all you have.
And I don’t know if
I should even try
To stop the inevitable
When freefall looks so
Beautiful.
I want to be held
Safe in the arms
Of someone who loves me
A little but not enough
That I can take them down with me.
I want to be small enough
That I don’t have to hide
My own fragility
But I don’t want you
To think I’m weak.
I want to lose control
And not give a fuck.
I want to fall to my knees
And not bother to get up.
And the funny thing is
I was laughing an hour ago.
Fuck, this poems made me sick.
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